As the Sister of Harry Potter

Sunday night, quarter to midnight. I sat in the Entrance Hall, disguised as my cat. Ophilia stood next to me under the Invisibility Cloak, which I had managed to convince Harry to let us borrow. Fred and George were in an empty classroom down the hall to the Kitchens with the Map, our speakers, and a couple of empty bags. Sarlanda and Cedric were making their rounds and were due to arrive any moment.

Finally, they arrived. When they made it to the bottom of the staircase, I approached and lead them to Fred and George. Ophilia followed behind to make sure no one else had followed them. When we were all safely in the room, I transformed and Ophilia took off the Cloak. Cedric looked shocked, but didn’t say anything.

“How are we doing?” I asked Fred in a hushed voice.

“Snape and Umbridge are in their offices,” he whispered, “Filch is on the fourth floor, and Norris is on the second.”

“Good,” I whispered.

George handed us our bags of speakers and handed a single one to Cedric. “Attach this to the wall in your common room some place high up with a Permanent Sticking Charm. And make sure you’re not seen.”

“You shouldn’t have any trouble, looks like everyone in Hufflepuff is in their dorms,” added Fred.

Cedric nodded, and I kissed his cheek. “Thanks love.”

He smiled and replied, “Anytime.” Then he left for his commonroom.

Fred re-examined the Map. “Alright Sar, there’s some bloke named Ian Cogon in the Slytherin Commonroom.”

Sarlanda nodded. “That’s okay, he’s only a third year.”

“Right, you’d better take the cloak in case of Snape. George and I’ll take the Great Hall, and Ophilia, you get the Entrance. Jen, you’d better take the Map and hit the Greenhouses.” He handed me the Map and we all shouldered our bags. “Meet back here when you’re done and we’ll move on to the first floor,” he added, and we split up.

-

We repeated this process seven times. We’d split up, place the speakers, re-group, and move on. We were doing good until we got to the fourth floor and Ophilia and I were doing the Library. I was placing the third speaker when Ophilia appeared next to me and pulled me behind a bookcase.

“It’s Filch!” she breathed. I finished up and we started peaking around corners. Since George had the Map and Fred had the Cloak, all we could do was pray we didn’t get caught.

He was walking down the main aisle, cutting us off from the location where we needed to put the final speaker. We hid again, and Ophilia mimed throwing something. ‘Distraction?’ she asked, mouthing the word. I shook my head. That would tip him off. But we might have no other choice…

Suddenly, I got an idea. I held my wand in one hand and the speaker in the other and mimed levitation. She shrugged her shoulders and we checked again. Filch was walking away from us towards the back of the Library.

“Get out,” I whispered to Ophilia, and I ran across the Library as stealthily as I could. I made it and hid behind another bookshelf. I glanced back and saw that Ophilia had made it to one right next to the exit. Unfortunately, Filch had heard me.

“Eh? Who’s there? I’ll get you! Oh, she’ll be so pleased…” Filch said gleefully, casting his lantern light all around. I couldn’t risk it being on the wall… so I improvised. I climbed the bookcase as high as I dared and stuck the speaker inside an empty spot in the case. Now to get out…

I pulled the Dungbomb I’ve been carrying for just in case out of my pocket. I gripped the bookcase, and threw the Dungbomb as hard as I could across the Library. It sailed over Filch’s head, bounced off a bookcase, and exploded on the other side of the Library. Thank Merlin for Chaser skills. Filch squealed excitedly and took off towards the explosion while Ophilia and I booked it out of there. No pun intended.

-

We were all a lot more careful after that. When we finally got to the seventh floor, we were all a bit skittish. Ophilia had the Map, and she gave out directions. “Alright, I’ll take Divination. Fred, you to do the corridor, George, Gryffindor. Sar, you should do Astronomy, seeing as you’re the best with curses. Jen, that leaves you with Ravenclaw Tower. Looks like everyone is asleep.”

“They’d better be,” I said, yawning. “It’s almost two.”

George handed me the Cloak. “Good luck mate, you’ll need this.” Fred took the Map, and we dispersed.

I reached the door for Ravenclaw okay. It just had an Eagle knocker on it. I took off the cloak and addressed it. “I’d like to get it please,” I told it.

“Then answer me this; which came first, the phoenix or the flame?”

I thought for a moment, then replied, “It’s a never ending circle, therefore it has no beginning or end.” It was my best guess, and luckily I was right. The door swung open. As I pulled the Cloak back over myself, I thought, ‘Ravenclaw needs a better guard-statue thingy… person.’

It was a beautiful tower. There were blue plush armchairs and far more study tables than Gryffindor had. The arched windows were blue and bronze stained glass with the Eagle, and the Ravenclaw banner hung everywhere. I picked a spot next to one of the many bookcases and was standing on an armchair about to place it when I heard footsteps coming down out of one of the dorms. ‘Dammit!’ I thought and jumped over the armchair. I landed behind it and crouched just as the person entered.

“He—hello?” The voice was feminine and stressed, but it was defiantly Brittany Chang. Judging by her sounds and shadows, she sat down by the fire. I sneaked a look at her. She had tears going down her face and she looked pale and almost sick. Her brown curls were limp and she looked as if she had gained a bit of weight over the summer. I frowned. This was so unlike her… could the rumors be true? Could she have actually gotten pregnant over the summer? ‘Ridiculous,’ I told myself. ‘It was probably that backstabbing Cyliana White. They must have gotten in a fight or something…’

I had to wait fifteen minutes before she fell asleep. When I was sure she was out, I stood cautiously. I placed the speaker and crept out, wondering what the hell was going on with that girl.

-

We were absolutely exhausted the next morning, but it was all well worth it. About half way through breakfast Monday, a loud coughing noise came out of the ceiling. Then, in Ophilia’s brightest, bubbliest voice…

“Hello everyone at Hogwarts!”

The hall went silent. Everyone was looking around for the source of the voice. The teachers looked just as confused, but Dumbledore was smiling all-knowingly and continued attending to his toast.

“We hope you’ve enjoyed your first week back!” continued Ophilia. “Now we’d like to introduce ourselves! I’m Miss Kumquat!”

“And I’m Miss Skulls,” came Sarlanda’s voice, full of humor for once in her life, “and we’re just two of the many Marauders. It is our duty to this school to keep up the mayhem and make everyone question their sanity!”

“Now, we’d like to address Professor Umbridge!” said Ophilia. “In case you haven’t noticed,”

“You all have been pranked,” finished Sarlanda. “And we won’t stop until Professor Umbridge leaves this school.”

“So, the sooner you leave Professor, the better.”

“And trust us, our pranks will only get bigger and better from here.”

“So… as our first prank…”

“We’ve installed an intercom system all throughout Hogwarts. And… it’s permanent.”

“So everyday, one or two of the Marauders will be giving you your daily announcements!”

“So this is Skulls and Kumquat, signing off. Miss Skulls would like to say that pink is disgusting and Professor Umbridge should stop wearing it.”

“Miss Kumquat would like to add that Professor Umbridge looks like a giant toad.”

Then the intercom switched off.

Excited buzzing filled the Great Hall. “Who’d be mad enough to do that?” one fourth year girl asked. I tried really hard not to look smug. Hermione shot myself and the Twins dirty looks all throughout the rest of breakfast, but like I said before, it was so worth it.

-

Wednesday morning was when George and I did our bit. We sat in Sarlanda’s dorm, holding the speaker.

“Ready?” he asked.

“As ready as I’ll ever be,” I replied, and turned on the speaker. “Hello Hogwarts! This is Miss Phoenix!”

“And I’m Mr. Matrix!”

“And we’re delivering your morning announcements!”

“Now, since we’re gone public, we’ve heard quite a few of you talking about us. So if you would like to send us comments or questions…”

“All you have to do it write us a note, address it to one of the Marauders, and tap it with your wand!”

“Oh, and this is a student only thing. Teachers be advised: if you try and send us stuff, you will break out in unpleasant boils.”

“And finally, we have a message. If any of you know Peter Pettigrew, would you please remind him that his child support was due three days ago, because Narcissa Malfoy really needs it since Draco is the most expensive of her children.”

“So that’s it for today, this is Matrix and Pheonix, signing off. Mr. Matrix would like to say that Dungbombs are a wizard’s best friend!”

“And Miss Phoenix would like to ask Professor Umbridge to stop speaking because her voice is really annoying.” And I turned it off.

-

“What? Again?! Harry! I wanted the whole team there!”

I stamped my foot in frustration.

“I know, I’m sorry Jen.”

“Come on Harry! Can’t you control yourself a little?”

“I’M TRYING JEN!” Harry yelled in my face.

I sighed, biting back my own anger. “Look, I know it’s hard, but… please Harry? I don’t want you expelled.”

-

Saturday night was not the best night for tryouts. One, because it had rained all morning and the Pitch was still muddy and squishy. Two, it was after dinner, and I had several younger students puke when they flew too fast.

I stood on the Pitch in jeans and a long sleeve shirt. Behind me were the Twins, who were in their Quidditch robes. I hadn’t had time to change on my desperate run down here after dropping off my bag in my dorm. I stood in front of quite a large group of Gryffindors, from first to seventh years. I swallowed hard. I hadn’t expected this many people, and I was already nervous. This was even worse than I thought.

“Okay, so, err… I’m your Captain, Jennifer Potter. And we’re looking for two Chasers and a Keeper. So… if you came to try out for anything else or are a first year, leave now.” A couple people left, but a few determined first years stayed. “Leave of I’ll hex you,” I growled, clutching my wand in my pocket. They left in a hurry. “Alright then… form a line, we’ll start with Chasers.”

Fred and George watched me drill everyone on Chaser skills, from passing to scoring and especially flying. Eventually Fred joined me to test everyone on dodging skills. My dorm mate Katie Bell tested third and did excellent, as I had hoped. She made it. After a long string of horrid players came Launa Lupin. Her long, dusty brown hair was in a pony tail and she looked very determined. She caught every pass, dodged every Bludger, and got four out of five shots past me, making her second only to Katie.

When it was all over, I announced, “Katie Bell and Launa Lupin. You’re our new Chasers. Keepers next.”

George and I tested out the Keepers. None of them were anything like Oliver Wood though. It came down to three people; Vicky Frobisher, a fourth year; Geoffrey Hooper, also a fourth year; and Ron.

“Hooper!” The boy jumped up eagerly. “Look, you’re a good flyer and all, but when you learn to stop complaining, you could make the team. But honestly, you’re very annoying. So no.”

He went away, stomping and grumbling, splattering mud everywhere.

“Vicky, you’re fair, but you’re in all those clubs. Priorities?”

“Umm, well… Charms Club is top of my list, so if practice clashes with it…”

“I see. Well, maybe next year.”

She left without a word.

“Well Ron, it looks like you’re our new Keeper.” He was stunned. I smiled. “Congrats.”

Harry finally made it back at around ten that night. His hand was bleeding like mad. As he tended to it, I told him about tryout results.

“Katie Bell is back on the team, and Launa is our other new Chaser. I think they’ll be good together, and Launa should be a good replacement for Angelina. But Ron…” I paused trying to think of the right words. “Look, he’s our friend, yes, but I’m really counting on him to fly better than he did tonight… I mean, the other two flew better, but Ron doesn’t complain as much as that other kid and Quidditch is his main priority.” I sighed. “Look Harry, I just want you to help him out. He’ll need it.”

“Okay, I can do that,” Harry replied, finished up with his hand.

“Gryffindor Quidditch Team!” I announced loudly to the commonroom. “Tomorrow, two o’clock sharp is our first practice!” Then I trooped up to my dorm and a nice hot shower.