What You Deserve

"Frank?" I could hear someone shouting. Ray?

My body twitched, and blood rose into my mouth. I couldn't stop shaking. Why couldn't I stop? I managed to shift my view to the source of the name - the name of the one person I wanted to see the most. "Jade! Shit... shit..." as another person neared, I realized in the darkening room that it was none other than Mikey. "Jade? Can you hear - oh.. oh god!" I heard him gagging, and could see his ever-fading silhouette jerk back, clutching at his nose and mouth, shivering abnormally.

"Gee..." he stuttered out, "venom! Shit! It's going to kill..." his voice faded out as I heard a ringing in my ears.

I could feel my body jerk again, with the mixture of pain surging through my veins. Burning. My shoulder was on fire, but at the same time, stung as if bees had just attacked me. I couldn't help but try to escape the feeling. It was getting darker. I felt around me rapidly, touching something cold, and gasped. "M-Mi..." I gagged on the blood still forming in the back of my throat.

"Mikey, go. Get Ray and get out of the area. You don't need to see this. Not again," this was Gerard's voice - I could hear it as if it was so far away, but as the voice spoke, a cold object - what seemed to be a hand - wrapped around mine, and another cool object touched my face. "Jade..." I heard him sigh, "this wasn't supposed to happen. Not to you. Not for Frank's sake..." he shifted. "Come on, Jade... hold on..." he pulled me closer, and cold wandered through the back of my torn shirt, seeming to freeze the blood that had yet to cease flowing out of the gouges in my skin. I felt the cool hand wander my face, pulling hair out of my eyes - I could see a faint shadow of it drifting across my eyes, running across my cheek, and sweeping my hair to the side. "Frank..." Gerard muttered, "Frank... she's going. It's worse that Alicia... Frank... Do you want me to...? Can you? What do you want to do? Let her?"

I heard him mumble Frank's name over and over, until I felt another body, and through my spasms, I could feel his own body shivering. "F-F..." I tried to speak, but I could only feel the blood boil out of my mouth, and I began coughing, searching for the air that I couldn't obtain. Everything was black.

Frankie? Why did my sight have to go now? I want to see my Frankie. Frankie, Frankie. Where did you go? Why did you leave me all alone? I want to ask you so much, Frankie. So, so much.

"Jade..." I heard his fading voice whisper, "please Jade.. be okay," I could feel the person's - my Frankie? - hugging me close. "I came here as fast as I could," the voice was small, as if it was breakable itself, "why did you take off the necklace? I asked you.." he trailed off, his voice replaced by whimpering. "Don't hurt. Don't hurt," he mumbled while rocking back and forth.

In the darkness of my mind, I could see Jamia standing in the distance, giving me a sympathetic smile. Soon, her smile was joined by a more concerned looking woman. Alicia. Christa could be seen, too, I noticed, but far more faintly than the other two. Out of the three, she was the only one holding such a blank, emotionless expression. As if it had been expected and she held no sympathy.

I wanted to cry out to them - to ask them if they knew what my fate would be. But did I really need to ask?

"Frank! Are you just going to sit there, or do something? She's suffering! Put an end to it! The venom's not going to save her - it's too little compared to her wounds," I could barely hear Gerard's voice.

I could feel liquid dripping onto my face - it felt like pools freezing over on my burning face - my burning skin. The stinging was spreading, seeming to fight the frozen liquid splashing onto my body - the only comfort that was provided for me.

I couldn't see. Where was everything? Were my eyes open? Was I dying?

Something in my mind told me that I was. I could feel my heart slowing. It was weakening with every second - every attempt to draw air into my damaged lungs. There was no way in hell I would survive - why would I think that I could even take one glance at my Frankie after this event would occur?

We knew it was true. Frankie knew. Oh, my dear, dear Frankie. All the things I wanted to say. Gerard knew, Mikey, Ray, and surely Bob knew. Did Turtle somehow know too? Hell, I even knew it.

It was too late.

The venom was supposed to save me, wasn't it? Turn me into one of them.

No. It wasn't supposed to save me. Otherwise, they wouldn't have hurt me so badly. It wouldn't have drained so much energy and blood.

"Jade..." Frank's voice was going too far away, making me struggle further in attempts to hear his soothing voice, "Jade, hold on.. please. Don't leave me, don't," I felt another cold entity brush my shoulder, and a small prick - more burning.

The burning - oh, hell. Was I on fire? Now I knew what it was like to be an intruder in a flaming bees nest. It hurt. It hurt so badly that if I could, I would have screamed at the top of my lungs to make it stop - just to kill me.

My mind felt like it was shutting down - giving me it's own last words.

Let me die.

I'm dying.

I know that I'm dying.

...I know...

I have to be dead...