What You Deserve

Rolling in my bed, I turned to stare at a small clock that Bob had bought me. I told him I didn't need one, but he ignored me. It had been an hour since Frank was crying about Jamia, and I finally stopped hearing sniffling. My mind ran through what had happened. Him crying, and stating he loved her... then just before I was getting too tired to listen, I had hugged him.

Apparently, I was getting used to how cold he was, because it didn't feel half as bad as the near-paralyzing cold that I had felt when he had first grabbed me. And when I hugged him, he started screaming at me! I swear, he was shouting every cuss word that he could think of, and finding even the smallest sentence to fit them into describing me... or something. I figured it was me, seeing as I was the only one around. Even though he had settled down before I hugged him, somehow he had managed to suddenly seem suddenly go back to being unstable. Then I remembered what he had said.

"I told her after I got bitten... and I thought she was going to leave me... but you know what? She hugged me. She fucking hugged me and said she never would!"

It clicked in my mind why he had started to get upset when I had hugged him. She had done the same to comfort him about something terrible, and we had just held a conversation that I could imagine the emotions being similar enough to strike a faint resemblance. Stupid me, hugging him and telling him everything was okay. In all honesty, it wasn't okay. He wasn't okay. He was far from it. Before I could think any further on the situation, my eyelids became to heavy, and I felt myself succumb to sleep.

I found myself in a familiar room. It was covered in a faint flowery scent, that was probably a perfume of some sort. There was a dark-haired girl in a gray bed, propping herself up with pillows, as a man walked in. "Frank?" I murmered, but he didn't respond, he merely looked over at the girl, and smiled a little. I could barely hear what they were saying.

"I'm feeling a lot better today," the girl smiled a little. It was weak, and she was frail. Actually, her entire body looked weak, and her skin was pale, almost more so than Franks. "I-I can't wait to be able to go to the park with you again, Frankie..." she continued, but soon after caught herself in a coughing fit.

Frank stared at her carefully. I couldn't really understand the look in his eyes. They were so sad, yet filled with happiness. "I can't either... rest up... maybe by the end of the month I'll be able to take you back to the park that I proposed to you by... would that make you happy?" he smiled faintly, as she nodded some, breaking away from her coughing fit. Apparently, this was my idea of the day before Jamia's death. It was the only logical explaination. "Good... now... I'm going to go make you something to eat..." he murmered, kissing her softly on the forehead.

"Wait... F-Frankie?" he turned around, hearing his coughing fiancee speak up. "P-please... reconsider... w-why can't I live forever with you? I-I'd get better... and... and I'd never--" she cut off again, to cough, but this cough wasn't as strong as the rest of them. Quietly, she scooted back down in the bed.

Frank shook his head, "you don't want to live forever. I don't want to curse you, Jamia... I love you... you're getting better... I don't want you to have to live like I do. You don't want to, just trust me. My lifestyle isn't how you think! You won't like it!" he quickly left the room before she had a chance to object. Suddenly, I realized her face had grown more pale, and I scurried over to her bedside.

Her eyes seemed to shift towards where I stood, and her arm reached out, as if trying to touch me, but after a few seconds, just hung over the side of the bed. "I-I'm sorry for making you think I'm better, Frank... I am.. but I don't want you to worry..." she murmered softly. Her voice was gentle, but sounded slightly raspy, probably from all of her coughing. A dog suddenly yipped, causing me to jump, as a small canine lept onto the girl's bed, and licked her other hand, which rested on her stomach. She turned her face to stare at the animal, "take care of my Frankie..." she murmered before smiling faintly, and raising her hand to pet it. "You know too..." her voice just seemed to fade off a little, as she spoke to the dog.

The room was blurring, as her eyes shifted back to me, almost as if her gaze was trying to penetrate my mind. "Don't you...?" Wait... what she had been saying was going to the dog, right? She couldn't see me. Frank couldn't see me, so she couldn't either. That was how things worked in dreams, right? Before I could question, I found the sound of a radio station buzzing in my ear.

Rolling over, I quickly slammed my hand down on the clock, "he set the damn thing..." I muttered, slipping out of bed. Literally, I just rolled right onto the ground. That was how my days went a lot at my old house. The alarm would go off, I'd hit the alarm, then roll off of the bed, and onto the cold floor, where I would eventually be awake enough to stand. Eventually, I did. I took my time on doing so, however. Then I threw on some of my new clothes, and quietly walked out of my room.

From Frank's room, I could hear the faintest sound of a coffee pot from downstairs, and let out a faint sigh. He wouldn't mind if I went downstairs then, seeing as someone else was awake. Carefully, I made my way to the door, trying not to wake up the man in the process, and reached out for the door.

"Where do you think you're going?" a voice suddenly questioned from right behind me, causing me to jump, and spin around, to face a very awake Frank.

I stared at his expression for a few minuted, studying for any chance that he would kill me, before answering. "I-I heard coffee downstairs... and so... I didn't want to wake you up... and I thought someone would be down there... so you wouldn't be mad and..." he started laughing. He was laughing at me! I stared vacantly at him.

"Your face..." he snickered, "you looked so worried," carefully, he grabbed me around the waist, and tugged me against him, "now... you aren't afraid of me.... are you?" I felt his breath against my neck, making me shiver.

He knew I was afraid. He wanted me to be scared. "More than others..." I muttered lowly, and heard him chuckle softly, before letting go of me, and taking a step back, to allow me to open the door, which I quickly did. Times like these, I needed a cigarette. Really badly.

"I know somebody who needs coffee!" Frank shouted loudly, hurrying me down the stairs. "The girl needs coffee! She's in a bad mood! Coffee cheers up people!" he wouldn't shut up. He really needed to, too.

As he shoved me into the kitchen, I stared at Gerard, who held a coffee cup in his hands, "just don't drink it all... Mikey'll want some when he gets up... which after Frank's yelling, will probably be very soon," he smiled a little, flashing a set of off-white teeth.

Nodding, I was handed a coffee cup from a cupboard, and poured a small amount of coffee into it, before leaning against the counter, and taking in my surroundings. It felt really wierd in this house. Everyone seemed friendly, and sociable. Not quite like my house. This was... kind of pleasant, but I couldn't help but miss my friends at home.