It's My Pain Too

Frank's POV

I spent the night in the Intensive Care Unit. I was fine for most of the night until my lungs decided that they hurt. The pain came in intense waves. My pulse was erratic and my fever was at boiling point. I was so hot to touch, Gerard had to get out of the bed.

Dr Bryar was my doctor for the night shift. He came in and gave me steroids and pain relief every few hours, but still checked up on me every half an hour or so. I know that this is my final day, maybe my final few hours, I'm not quite sure.

Gerard is in the chair beside me. His hand is holding mine gently as they lay by my side limply.

"Gerard?" I ask.

My voice is horse, death-like.

"Yer baby?" He asks sadly.

"Can you call my friends and ask them to visit?" I ask, my breath becoming short.

"Sure." He says and pulls out his phone.

It's lucky that he is friends with all my friends, because there is no need to ask me for phone numbers, which I can't recall.
It takes a whole ten minutes to call everyone. I don't have many friends, however, they all agreed to come and pay their one and only visit.

*****1 hour later*****

Everyone is gathered around my bed. My parents have made a surprise visit, their explanation was they had a second honeymoon. They are together, but it doesn't make me happy.
By now I have an oxygen mask attached to my face as it has become harder and harder to breathe.
I need to make final arrangements.

"Everyone, listen...please." I start and everyone turns to face me.

"After this you can all go..." I take another gasping breath."I want you to all attend my funeral, but I don't want you here when I die." It's getting harder to speak.

"I want you all to go...everyone but Gerard." I look at mom and dad when I say this.

Mom's eyes are full of tears, dad looks the same. My friends are looking at me and silently promising that they will attend my funeral. Gerard just looks at me and holds my hand. His strong face is slowly crumbling as he realises that I want him to hold me until I die.

Mere minutes pass, and I give a look of despair to everyone around me. One by one everyone gives my a gentle hug and leave with tears in their eyes. It starts with my friends then my mom.

"I love you, so, so much." She whispers in my ear.
A tear falls onto my cheek as she kisses it and hugs me gently.

Dad is the last one.

"I am so proud of you frank. I know that I haven't been there but I love you and not a day went by where I didn't think about you." He says.
It starts out strong but falters by the end.

One last hug and he walks away.

"It's time, isn't it Frankie?" Gerard asks me, I give a weak nod.

Gerard puts the bars down and climbs into bed. He sits me up as gently as he can but it still hurts. I give a whimper. He shush's me and lays my head against his chest. I find his hands and wrap them around me. He holds me tightly but not tight enough to hurt me, just enough to make me calm.

We lay for a few moments and just snuggle. I feel content and know that I can move on to the afterlife as a happy person.

"Are you scared?" Gerard suddnely asks me.

"No." I gasp.

"Why?" He asks again.

"Cuz, I am happy to have lived this much and met you." I wheeze out.

"I will never forget you." He says.

"I'll watch over you every day for as long as you live." I reply.

It is silent for a few moments, I break it.

"You can go if you want, I don't want you to suffer with me." I say.

"I made a promise to you frankie. I promised that when your time came I would hold you until you were cold." He says,
It's strong, desperate, and sad all at once. I simply nod against his chest.

"Frankie?" Gerard questions.

"Mm?" I reply.

"How long will it take?" He asks.

"I don't know. Can you buzz my doctor?" I ask.

Gerard doesn't answer, he just reaches over and presses the button to summon my doctor.
We don't have to wait long as Dr Mille rushes in.

"What's wrong Frank?" She asks, clearly panicked.

"It's time...how long will it take?" I ask.

"Not long. Do you know how you want to go?" She asks.

Put me to sleep, please." I ask.

Dr Mille nods and bustles away for a moment.

"Don't let go until I'm gone...please." I ask Gerard.

"I won't, I promise." He replies.

Dr Mille comes back into the room.

"Frank this is just a sedative. It has nothing in it to make you die any faster, it will just send you to sleep so you die without pain, ok?" She says.

I nod, she takes the syringe to my chemo port. I grab her wrist.

"Thank you, for everything." I gasp.

She replies with a gentle hug.

"You will be missed around here, but I know you will live in a happy and pain free afterlife." She whispers.

"Stay." I say, she nods in reply and injects the syringe into my port.

It takes a feww minutes, but I soon feel sleepy enough to close my eyes, but before I do I whisper

"I love you Gerard."

"I love you too." he replies, before bending over and kissing my lips tenderly, before holding me a little bit tighter.

I close my eyes and go to sleep. My time has come.