My Way Home Is Through You

When Ray awoke, he had the distinct feeling that he was being watched. He squeezed his eyes shut tighter and told himself the feeling would pass. For a moment, he lay completely still, waiting. But the feeling did not pass. Then he heard a small voice whispering close to his ear.

"Daddy?"

Ray mashed his face further into his pillow. He was not ready to get up yet. The emotions caused by Jenna's letter were still fresh in his mind, and he felt he could do nothing but wallow in them. For the first time in two days, his mind was filled with one selfish thought.

Leave me alone.

And so he said nothing, and did not move at his daughter's whisper.

"Daddy?"

This time her voice was louder, more insistant. Resigning himself to the fact that he would not be left alone, Ray forced aside his irritation and picked his head up, opening one eye.

Anna sat on the edge of her bed, watching him. She held her rabbit in her lap and smiled when he looked at her. Returning her smile half-heartedly, he glanced toward the windows. Sunlight streamed into the room through the closed blinds, telling him that it was probably mid-morning.

"What's the matter, Anna?" he groaned, still not sitting up.

"It's morning!" she said brightly.

Ray propped himself up on one elbow. "I see that. Is something wrong?"

Her smile faltered a bit. She shook her head, then asked, "How come you're not up yet?"

He sighed and let his head fall back onto the pillow. "Because I'm very tired. I need my sleep."

Her face fell and her voice was small as she murmured, "I'm sorry."

The sadness in her voice snapped Ray back to reality as he looked back up at her. The bright smile was gone from her face, replaced by a miserable look of discomfort. He mentally kicked himself, feeling terrible for being so short with her.

"Hey, kiddo, you want to go have breakfast with the guys again?" he asked in what he hoped was a cheerful voice. He gave her a real smile this time as he sat up in bed. Her face lit up once more and she nodded.

He got up and rummaged through his duffel bag for a fresh t-shirt and jeans. "I bet you're hungry, huh? Have you been awake for a long time?"

"A little," she said, shrugging as she came to stand by his side. He picked her up and kissed her nose. She giggled.

"Thank you for waking me up, baby." He set her back down and ruffled her hair. Pulling his jeans on over his shorts, he tossed his bag aside and went for her suitcases again. With a grin, he pulled out her little My Chem shirt and a pair of shorts, then helped her get dressed. He laughed with satisfaction once she was dressed.

The t-shirt only added to the similarities in their appearances. It was like looking into a funhouse mirror. Though her hair was darker and longer than his own, she looked so much like him that he could understand how Jenna must have seen her. Anna was indeed her father's daughter, that much was clear.

As they left left the hotel room to go down to the bus, Ray avoided looking at the folder in the tv room. His mind was still filled with all he had read in the letter the night before, and he knew that if he let it take control, it would break him. And so he tried only to think of the day ahead, and how they would enjoy the band's first day of vacation.

Author's Note: Okay, this chapter turned out as filler because the original direction I was going to go with was just too hard to do. As you can see at the beginning, I was planning on having Ray be a bit of a dick and worrying about himself more... But I sat in front of the screen for two hours trying to write it, and nothing worked. Nothing felt natural or right. So I got filler instead. Sorry about that. There will be more of Angsty Ray later, when I figure out how to deal with him.