My Way Home Is Through You

When Ray pulled into his brother's driveway, he actually felt nervous. He had no idea just how to tell Lou about Anna. He was just thankful that it was only Lou, for the moment. Telling his parents later on would not be pretty.

On the other hand, some of his anxiety came from the fact that he had just left his four-year-old child in the care of guitar-wielding madman. Frank had arrived in a particularly bouncy mood, much to Anna's delight. When he saw the box of toys Anna was playing with, he immediately dropped to the floor to join her. Ray had left the house with their high-pitched squeals and giggles echoing in his ears.

Ray stood on his brother's doorstep, hands shaking as he reached out to ring the bell. His stomach seemed to clench as the door swung open.

"Ray!" Lou exclaimed. The brothers embraced, then the older man stepped back to let Ray in.

"So you're finally off tour, huh?" Lou said with a grin. Ray crashed on the couch and nodded.

"Yeah, finally."

"You realize it's been over a year, don't you?" Lou sat beside him. He was a tall man, like his younger brother. In fact, he looked very much like Ray, though his hair was shorter and darker, without nearly as much curl. His dark goatee gave his face a clear distinction from Ray's.

Ray chuckled. "Yeah, but you know how we are. We love touring." He paused. "Besides, now... Things may change..."

Lou's eyebrows furrowed and he looked sharply at Ray. "What do you mean? Is something wrong? You guys aren't having problems, are you?"

"Oh, no, no," Ray said hurriedly. "No, it's not that. It's just..." He ran his hand through his hair. "Dude, I don't even know how to say this."

"Ray, what's the matter?" Now Lou was concerned.

Ray sighed. "Do you remember my old girlfriend Jenna?"

Lou thought for a moment. "Jenna, Jenna... Yeah, I remember her. She was a real sweetheart. What about her?"

"Well," Ray started. "I just found out that she died two weeks ago. Car crash."

"Oh, bro, I'm so sorry," Lou leaned back into the sofa. "But that was ages ago. Did you still have contact with her?"

"No," Ray replied. "I hadn't seen her since we broke up."

"So how did you find out about her passing?"

"Tony Beatty told me about it," said Ray.

"Your lawyer?" Lou gave him a confused look. By now, he was very concerned. "What the hell does he have to do with it?"

"Well, apparently I was mentioned in her Will." Ray swallowed hard and pushed on. "I'm the father of her child."

Lou sat stunned for a moment. "The father of her... What?" He looked his younger brother in the eyes. "Are you fucking kidding me?"

Ray shook his head. "No, it's no joke. I've got a four-year-old daughter."

Lou was silent for another moment. Then, with a flabbergasted look still plastered on his face, he said, "How the hell did this happen? Weren't you guys careful? Didn't you use protection?"

Ray rolled his eyes. "Jesus, Lou!" he exclaimed irritably. "Is that all you can think to say? Look, what's done is done. I have a four-year-old daughter, I think it's a little late for a lecture on safe sex!" He sighed and looked at the floor.

"Look, she never told me she was pregnant. In fact, this was reason she broke up with me. She didn't want to put me through the stress of it, or some crazy shit like that." He shook his head and looked up at his brother. "I wouldn't have even known about my own child if she hadn't had that accident, Lou."

The brothers sat in silence. When Lou finally spoke, his voice was softer than before.

"So how are you handling this, man?"

Ray shrugged. "I'm doing a lot better than I was the other day. I mean, this was all just kind of sprung on me. We were wrapping up the tour, planning on going into the studio again soon, looking forward to vacation. Then all of a sudden, here's this little person who needs me to be her father. And I don't really know what I'm doing, bro." He shook his head. "I'm terrified I'm going to fuck up.

"And the truth is, I never really got over Jenna, either. I still loved her. So all of this has really fucked with my head." He let out a heavy sigh. "But I'm getting better with it. Surprisingly, a lot of it's coming pretty naturally."

"What about the kid?" Lou asked. "A little girl, you said?"

"Yeah," Ray said with a smile. "Her name is Anna. And she's... Amazing. She's handled this all so well, all things considered. A hell of a lot better than I have. And she's so sweet. She's such a good kid. Smart, too. She just continues to surprise me."

Lou smiled at him. "Sounds like you're doing better than you think. Congrats, little brother." He hugged him with a laugh. "So when do I get to meet my niece?"

Ray smiled. "We can go right now, if you want. I left her with Frank, so... The sooner we get back, the better..."