Paradise Lost

Jorel was awake, but out of it. Never in my life had I dreamed that I would walk into a hospital room to see Jay of all people, wrapped in tubes and connected to so many machines.

“Hey.” He grumbled out, watching me as I walked in.

“Hey yourself. How are you?” I asked, walking to the edge of his bed.

“I’ve been better. How come you’re here?”

“I flew home. I got frantic texts and calls telling me about what happened.”

“I’m pretty stupid, I guess.”

“Shut up, Jay.” I laughed, sitting down on the edge of his bed.

“I’m really sorry about all of this.”

“It’s fine. I probably just lost my job, but whatever.”

“Nah, it’s not whatever. I think you should go back.”

“And I think you’re fucking crazy if you’re expecting me to go get on another plane and fly all the way back to O’hare. Never.”

“You’re going to have to go sometime.”

“Then I’ll go when you can actually handle being on your own, because god knows you need a babysitter.”

“Did you have fun while you were there?”

“I went to a meeting with Brett and then got on a plane home. There wasn’t time for fun.”

“I’m sorry.” Jay stated, before a nurse walked into the room.

“I’m sorry miss, but we’re going to have to ask you to leave for now. We have tests to run and we need to speak with Mr. Decker.”

“Ok, thanks.” I stated, waving goodbye to Jorel and walking out of the room into the waiting area with everyone else.

Once I was out there, I sat down in the chair, exhausted.

“Hey, you need to get some sleep. I’ll take you over to my place, or you can go to your and Jay’s place if you want.” George said, looking over at me.

“I want to go home. I’ve got a car, so I can drive myself.”

“Ok, are you sure? I don’t want you to have a wreck because you’re so tired.”

“I’ll be fine,” I said, yawning at the same time.

“Yep, I’m driving you home, come on.” George stated, helping me up.

The car ride to my place was a silent one, but it was comfortable. I managed to keep my eyes open the entire time and not fall asleep. When we pulled up to the house, I dug through my purse to find my house key before stepping out of the car. George walked me to the door to make sure I got in ok, considering it was now dark out, and when I turned to walk inside and say goodnight, the one thing that I wasn’t expecting happened.

I leaned in and kissed George. And the thing was, he kissed back.

As soon as I realized what had happened, I jerked away, George and I staring at each other in shock.

“I’m so sorry, I don’t even know what I was thinking. It just…happened.” I said, my words coming out fast and jumbled together.

“It’s ok, I don’t mind.” George said, staring deep into my eyes.

Before I could comprehend what was going on, George began to kiss me again, and we had now made our way to the couch. He leaned me down into and began to run his hands up and down my sides, causing me to shudder in response.

“George, we can’t do this. You know that. It just doesn’t feel right.” Guilt flooded my system.

“It feels right to me.”

Then, George left the house silently. I heard his engine crank and his car turn down the road, and stayed on the couch wondering why that had just happened. How I could have let it happen. Yes, Jay and I fought, and we fought constantly. George and I had never had a fight in our lives, and he was the one person always there for me. If my life was a movie, then this would be the cliché part where I found out that George was the perfect guy for me and that my entire life had been spent waiting for him to come along. Unfortunately, I was in the real world and shit just doesn’t turn out that way. I loved that guy that made me feel like shit, and I didn’t think it was going to change. And now, my friendship with George may never be the same, and the pieces may never be picked up. What had I done?