Why Won't You Fall Into My Arms?

Sniffling loudly, I twisted within the bed sheets in an attempt to become more comfortable. The rays of light from the window blinded me so I pulled the covers above my head to hide from daylight. Footsteps resounded through the room as Jack entered and sat himself beside me.

“I told you you shouldn’t have just walked off in the middle of the night. Now you have a horrible cold and can’t stop sneezing. I say that’s karma.”

“Oh shut up mister high and mighty,” I snapped with my nasally voice, shifting under the covers. “You’ve probably got enough STDs for karma to have bitten you in the ass too.”

He laughed “I’m clean actually, that’s what my bedside condoms are for.”

Shuddering dramatically, I squirmed around even further as the sheets clung to my clammy skin. I hated being ill, especially since normally it bought me a free day at my house with the TV all to myself. Now it just bought me a gloating Jack and a tight throat.

“Ugh I feel so disgusting,” I moaned.

My hair fell in a blonde mess around my head and stuck to the sweat on my forehead. Ever since this morning after I’d wandered out into the night I’d come down with the worst cold I’d ever had. For a few hours I’d just tried to sleep it off but a sweat had made that almost impossible.

“I bet you still look lovely,” Jack teased from above the covers.

“Bet you I look like shit.”

He laughed again and carefully pulled back the covers so I was visible to him.

“What’s the time?” I groaned out and turned away.

“About four in the afternoon,” he couldn’t stop his chuckle from vibrating through him.

“Really? I didn’t know I slept for that long. What have you done with yourself for all this time?”

“Oh you know,” he shrugged casually “I jacked off looking at porn magazines all afternoon, the usual.”

I buried my head under a pillow only to have it removed by Jack.

“You’re disgusting,” I groaned.

“Only joking,” he sniggered but when I just ignored him he continued “look Sophia I brought you some food.”

Turning around slowly, I took in the tray of steaming soup that Jack balanced on his lap. His eyes studied my drained face but I didn’t meet them because the soup had captured my attention.

“Have I ever told you how much I love you?” I joked before sitting up and grasping for the tray of chicken soup. It tasted so good that I momentarily forgot Jack was still staring at me.

“Your dimples show when you eat,” he smirked. Rolling my eyes, I shovelled another spoonful of the delicious liquid into my mouth. “And your eyebrows arch when you roll your eyes.”

“Stop creeping me out,” my voice rung with my blocked up nose and swollen throat.

“Sorry,” he lowered his gaze onto what I was wearing. During my long morning hours asleep I’d stripped off my shirt and jeans so the heat rushing through my veins was tamed.

“You should really get sick more often,” he remarked as his eyes lingered on my chest. Hastily, I pulled the sheets up to cover my bra but otherwise ignored him. “Is that any way to treat the guy who brought you food?”

Smiling, I handed him the empty bowl and leaned in closer. Jack’s eyes gleamed with excitement especially when the covers I was holding fell away to expose my bra again. I stopped just short of his mouth and quickly resettled myself in bed. “Don’t want to give you my germs.”

He groaned “now you owe me another favour.”

With that he disappeared from the room so I was left alone to swallow in my own sickness with the occasional sneeze breaking my self inflicted silence.

--

It took me two entire days to shake off the horrendous bug which had plagued my body all day and all night. My nose was still red, my throat was still raw and my head felt considerably lighter on my shoulders but nothing would perturb Jack from his adventure. Not today.

The clouds outside had all scattered away into the horizon as if they felt Jack’s determination too. I blinked as I stepped outside, squinting at the bright sunshine. I’d been a prisoner for two whole days and most of that had been spent under a deep sea of blankets.

But I wanted to get out of this town just as much as Jack. It had been over a week, possibly two because time was getting increasingly harder to track, and we both needed some space. Space from each other and space from that house of his. It was a gorgeous house in itself but being cooped up within walls all the time was beginning to get to us. Normally, we would end up fighting over trivial things and then crashing out in front of a movie before drifting off to sleep together. It was an infuriating pattern that had to be broken.

“You got the picnic packed?” Jack asked me, seemingly unfazed by how bizarre this whole day trip was.

Instead of a sixteen year old I felt more like a thirty year old with a husband and kids going for a picnic on the beach. The same very beach that I had never in all of my life visited. In fact, I had only ever laid eyes on the ocean once and that was when travelling hundreds of miles in the air comfortably sat in a plane. It was funny how one could whittle away their whole lives never experiencing simple things that so many took for granted.

“Yes, all packed,” I shut the boot of Jack’s expensive car and made my way to the passenger’s seat. “I still don’t see why you won’t let me drive.”

“You’re a girl and this is an expensive car. Do the math Soph” he started up the ignition while I simply rolled my eyes, wishing that I had some amazing stash of comebacks collected up in my brain.

“You’re a pig,” I eventually conjured up, rolling down the window to allow a slight breeze to tickle my hot skin. It seemed that the weather was stuck in whiplash of mood swings; never knowing if it was up or down, sunny or stormy. But I enjoyed that fresh wind which whipped my blonde hair into my face anyway even if it was slightly too bitter.

“So,” Jack began and I turned to see him stealing glances at me every now and then “looking forward to seeing me in my swimming shorts?”

“That’s the moments I’ve lived my whole life for,” I clutched my chest dramatically and mock swooned. He smirked and slid on some shades that had previously been weighing down his tee-shirt neck. It was annoying how good looking he was, infuriating really.

To try to distract my raging hormones, I peered out at the deserted streets we were now passing. Familiar lanes and recognizable walkways flashed by and for a brief moment it was nice to pretend that everything was normal. But of course the odd abandoned cars that Jack had to swerve around crushed those fantasies almost as soon as they sprung up. A frown appeared on my forehead but I wiped it off quickly with a smile. Today wasn’t that day for worrying. Today was the day for sun and sea.

“Have you ever been surfing before Soph?”

I laughed “I’ve never even been to the beach before so don’t get ahead of yourself.”

“Never?” he scoffed incredulously “we live a couple of hours drive away and you’ve never been?”

With a shake of my head I couldn’t help but feel attracted to the way Jack’s arm muscles protruded against his tanned skin while turning the wheel. I squirmed in my seat, scolding myself for being so fickle.

“You, Sophia, haven’t lived.”

“So I’ve been told,” I trailed off distantly, squinting against the sun’s harsh glare.

“Here,” he quickly swiped off his sunglasses and reached over to place them in my lap. I stared at them for a moment, feeling the gesture similar to that of sharing a jacket when cold, and sensed the heat glow under my cheeks. Jack was very much and boy and I was still very much a girl. I took them after my hesitation and placed them playfully on the ridge of my nose.

“How do I look?” I struck a stupid pose that coaxed a laugh out of the boy beside me.

“Like a boy with boobs.”

“Hey!” I tried to hide my smile under a growl.

“A very hot looking boy though, one that I would totally turn gay for,” he was shaking with silent laughter. I couldn’t help but let my smile slip. I loved Jack like this – smiling and open and beautiful. Not that I would tell him that.

“You’re a weird one Jack Adams.”

“So I’ve been told,” he mocked my earlier statement.

Rolling my eyes again, I switched on his stereo to hear ‘The Kings of Leon’ blaring out at me. I was surprised to hear their first album playing and not the more commercial album that was repeated in the charts.

“You like their earlier stuff?” I asked curiously.

“Definitely, their best work is their underrated work.”

“I agree,” it was weird saying those two words to Jack.

After that we drifted into a comfortable silence with his music. An hour passed us by peacefully before I’d had enough of rock and plugged my ipod up to his stereo. I ignored Jack’s cringe as I put Colbie Caillat on loudly and swatted his protesting hands away.

“She’s got a pretty voice,” I defended, letting my eyes close as we sped along the highway, feeling empty without the usual booming traffic.

A fingertip lightly traced an invisible line from my hand up along my arm, awakening goose bumps in its path. Opening one eye cautiously, I watched as Jack continued this journey up my arm as if I wouldn’t notice. His gaze was firmly focused onto the road but I could feel his attention was drawn to me.

“Jack?” I watched his finger stop its journey and retreat quickly back onto the steering wheel.

“Sorry.”

My tongue ran quickly along my lips to get some sensation back into the dried cracks as I watched him.

“You don’t have to be sorry.”

“Well I know you don’t like it when I touch you.”

I fought with my civil war of thoughts. Half wanted me to leap myself at him despite him being in the middle of driving, and the other half wanted me to tell him he was damn right about not wanting to be touched. But of course that was a lie. I could still feel his touch burning along my arm. And I could still feel how good it all felt.

“It’s just that you’re so addictive Sophia,” he grinned like this was a perfectly normal sentence. “Your skin… it’s just so… so inviting… I guess… ugh forget I said anything.”

He was fiddling with the words as they tumbled out. A slight brazen colour kissed his cheeks that were normally a pale tan.

I smiled wistfully to myself and pushed his sunglasses further up my nose. So Jack wasn’t completely oblivious to the tension between us. It was nice to momentarily glance at a less in control Jack who was vulnerable enough to speak his mind even if it was mutilated sentences.

Suddenly, it was overwhelmingly hot in the car and I craved my brother’s convertible top. I fanned myself pathetically with a hand but found it was the same warm air everywhere. Pulling slightly at my tank top, I stretched out my bikini lacing that was digging harshly into my neck. I needed a drink. It was like all of my discomforts had suddenly sprung upon me at once.

“Can we stop for a bit?” I asked, breaking our silence. Jack nodded without looking at me. We pulled over even though there were no pushy cars coming up impatiently behind us. The long stretch of road was surrounded by the dirt desert that lay just outside our town. It stretched almost all the way down to the coast and meant the lack of people here was less felt. Nobody lived in these parts anyway.

I stole a glance at Jack and wondered to myself just what I was going to do if things carried on as they were. I was falling so hard that it was almost inevitable that I was going to crash. I had a feeling, too, that he wasn’t going to be there to help me up when it all went bad and one of us did something that we were would regret.

I just hoped things returned to normal before that happened.