Modes
i-won't-interrupt
“Katy?”
“Oh no.”
“What?”
“You’re on Best Friend Mode.”
“Please?”
“Okay, okay. I’m on Best Friend Mode now.”
Kris smiles, and he’s sure Katy can see it through the phone. “Adam –”
“– is turning you gay.”
“No!”
Now there is silence from Katy’s end.
“… Right.”
“Katy.” He sounds exasperated.
“Fiiine. Silent ‘I-Won’t-Interrupt’ Best Friend Mode now.”
“… I like him.”
“I knew it!”
“Katy,” he says, dragging out the y and massaging his left temple.
“Sorry.”
“Yeah.”
“All right, continue.”
“I like him and I like you.”
“Seriously, Kris, this is like that day you told me you liked me. Are you sure you want to relive that?”
That distracts Kris for a second and he remembers how it was just Kris-and-Katy on the beach eight years ago, looking out to the horizon, with his right fist balled tight inside his pocket and Katy’s braids swaying in the wind. He remembers Katy, I like you and he remembers I know, Kris. And then he remembers why he’s on the phone in the first place.
“Adam’s a boy.”
“And I’m a girl.”
“And I’m a boy.”
“Kris.” And now she’s using that tone of voice that always made Kris feel like he didn’t know something he should. “Do you like me because I’m a girl?”
Kris is taken aback by this question. “Of course not!”
“Do you like Adam because he’s a boy?”
Kris shakes his head.
“You shook your head, didn’t you?”
He nods, a little smile tugging on his lips. Katy knows him too well.
“You nodded!” Katy says, excited.
“I did.”
“So, did I help at all?” Katy asks.
“Yep.”
“So. Wife Mode now?”
“Sure.”
“We’re still married. Don’t go cheating on me.”
“No sex, got it.”
“No kissing. No late-night revelation of feelings. No early-morning revelation of feelings. No revelation of feelings at all.”
And now Kris beams, eyes crinkling, white teeth shining. “I wouldn’t do that to you.”
“The next time I go on Best Friend Mode, I do not want to hear, ‘But, Katy, I love him!’, all right?”
“But I love him –”
“Don’t tell me that while I’m on Wife Mode –”
“– in a completely different way from how I love you.”
Katy is rendered speechless.
“You should really quit interrupting me, seriously – we should add that to our modes! Silent ‘I-Will-Not-Interrupt’ Spouse Mode. What do you think?”
Kris hears the laugh he misses so much and he remembers exactly why he loves her. “Sounds good,” she says, light and bouncy, her voice as pretty as she is.
“All right, I’m on Husband Mode now.”
“I love you.”
“I love you, too, sweetie. Night. Have a good sleep.”
“You, too. On your own bed. Not Adam’s.”
“You’re on Wife Mode! You’re not supposed to talk about things we talk about on Best Friend Mode!”
“No matter what mode I’m in, I’m still Katy, and Katy is your wife and Katy will always be your best friend. Okay?”
And now Kris looks out the window and to the heavens, asking God what he ever did to deserve her. He smiles and nods. “Katy Mode and Kris Mode,” he mumbles softly just so he could hear himself say it aloud.
“What?”
“Nothing, sweetie. I love you. Night.”
“Oh no.”
“What?”
“You’re on Best Friend Mode.”
“Please?”
“Okay, okay. I’m on Best Friend Mode now.”
Kris smiles, and he’s sure Katy can see it through the phone. “Adam –”
“– is turning you gay.”
“No!”
Now there is silence from Katy’s end.
“… Right.”
“Katy.” He sounds exasperated.
“Fiiine. Silent ‘I-Won’t-Interrupt’ Best Friend Mode now.”
“… I like him.”
“I knew it!”
“Katy,” he says, dragging out the y and massaging his left temple.
“Sorry.”
“Yeah.”
“All right, continue.”
“I like him and I like you.”
“Seriously, Kris, this is like that day you told me you liked me. Are you sure you want to relive that?”
That distracts Kris for a second and he remembers how it was just Kris-and-Katy on the beach eight years ago, looking out to the horizon, with his right fist balled tight inside his pocket and Katy’s braids swaying in the wind. He remembers Katy, I like you and he remembers I know, Kris. And then he remembers why he’s on the phone in the first place.
“Adam’s a boy.”
“And I’m a girl.”
“And I’m a boy.”
“Kris.” And now she’s using that tone of voice that always made Kris feel like he didn’t know something he should. “Do you like me because I’m a girl?”
Kris is taken aback by this question. “Of course not!”
“Do you like Adam because he’s a boy?”
Kris shakes his head.
“You shook your head, didn’t you?”
He nods, a little smile tugging on his lips. Katy knows him too well.
“You nodded!” Katy says, excited.
“I did.”
“So, did I help at all?” Katy asks.
“Yep.”
“So. Wife Mode now?”
“Sure.”
“We’re still married. Don’t go cheating on me.”
“No sex, got it.”
“No kissing. No late-night revelation of feelings. No early-morning revelation of feelings. No revelation of feelings at all.”
And now Kris beams, eyes crinkling, white teeth shining. “I wouldn’t do that to you.”
“The next time I go on Best Friend Mode, I do not want to hear, ‘But, Katy, I love him!’, all right?”
“But I love him –”
“Don’t tell me that while I’m on Wife Mode –”
“– in a completely different way from how I love you.”
Katy is rendered speechless.
“You should really quit interrupting me, seriously – we should add that to our modes! Silent ‘I-Will-Not-Interrupt’ Spouse Mode. What do you think?”
Kris hears the laugh he misses so much and he remembers exactly why he loves her. “Sounds good,” she says, light and bouncy, her voice as pretty as she is.
“All right, I’m on Husband Mode now.”
“I love you.”
“I love you, too, sweetie. Night. Have a good sleep.”
“You, too. On your own bed. Not Adam’s.”
“You’re on Wife Mode! You’re not supposed to talk about things we talk about on Best Friend Mode!”
“No matter what mode I’m in, I’m still Katy, and Katy is your wife and Katy will always be your best friend. Okay?”
And now Kris looks out the window and to the heavens, asking God what he ever did to deserve her. He smiles and nods. “Katy Mode and Kris Mode,” he mumbles softly just so he could hear himself say it aloud.
“What?”
“Nothing, sweetie. I love you. Night.”
♠ ♠ ♠
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