Astronaut.

All he wanted was for Jupiter to understand.

“Lora Joan knew what it meant to die,” he said softly in her ear. “She also knew what it meant to live.” A hopeful smile lifted his expression. “She’s happy with what she got to do. I promise you.”

Her eyes lifted to his, and she understood. Maybe now it was time to forgive. Could she do that, after all the pain he had caused her? After all the promises he hadn’t kept? But… what about all the ones he had? She was afraid to let herself be vulnerable to him again, after the last time he had cut her so deep. Her lips fell apart, as if unable to hold back the words behind them any longer. “I was lost without you,” she whispered. Her mouth trembled as her eyes filled to the brim with tears. “I didn’t know where to go. I didn’t know what to say to people.” Giving in to her need, she buried her face in his chest and sobbed. It was good to feel his warm arms holding her after all the loneliness she had felt.

His cheek rested on her head as he told her a secret. “I was lost without you, too.” When she looked up at him, he kissed her cheek softly. Feeling her melt against him was like a material answer to all of the prayers he had come to have. He hadn’t realized in time – he left before the fact had graced his mind – but Jupiter was the world he had been searching for. He had left everything behind because he hadn’t known where he stood in the world. His belief was, plain and simple, that if he searched far enough he would something to replace the absence he had felt in his heart. In truth, he had had it in the palm of his hand, right before him. He had held it, and then dropped it because he hadn’t seen it there.

Jupiter was his world, and he should have never left her.



“I want you to know something, Jupiter Anne,” Miss Mays’ old voice whispered huskily. Jupiter was entranced by the familiar lines – like those of her Mama – she saw etched into the woman’s sagging skin.

They had met the day before at their joint mailbox, and the elderly woman had instantly attached to her. “Oh, I just moved here!” she had informed her with a cheery smile, and then insisted she come try her Secret Tea. The name had mystified Jupiter’s mind, and now here she sat, sipping a cup of something sweet and delicious that left a very warm feeling running down her throat. It felt like she was swallowing cooled lava.

Miss Mays was telling a story. She went about it magically, her slightly dirty glasses perched precariously on the end of her spotted nose. Her golden hair was held back in a thick braid that draped across her hunched shoulder. Her long fingers trembled gently as she scooped sugar into her small china glass. Its intricate designs were painted on in pale magenta. “I had just left my husband,” she said, stirring her tiny spoon through the dark liquid. A soft clinking sound was a timer as she spoke. “Mythird husband,” she pointed out with a chuckle.

Jupiter smiled a little and thought of her first, as well as the one she had never married. Her eyes moved to her empty ring finger as Miss Mays continued.

“I had just left him, and now I was travelling the world. I wanted to find myself. I didn’t know where I was going, all I knew was I wanted toget there.” Her hands flowed through the air, painting a vivid picture for Jupiter with her words. “The ocean was so huge. I couldn’t see the end of it! In the mornings, I went out on the deck of the ship just so I could watch the sun rise. It was so beautiful. Every gemstone imaginable was scattered on the surface of the water.”

She would see it in her mind, sparkling brilliantly in a myriad of bright colors. If she closed her eyes, she could imagine the feeling of sea mist giving her face tiny fairy kisses.

“At night, I swear, I could see all the stars in the sky. Every one was like a big, fat diamond winking at me.” Miss Mays’ old eyes twinkled with the fond memory. “My young lover was braiding my hair.” Her hands floated over the blonde braid on her shoulder. “He was good to me…”

Jupiter said, in the tiniest voice possible: “Noah made me feel like a princess.” She was leaning over her cup of tea, staring into the rising steam with moisture clouding her eyes.

“My darling,” the hostess said in a gentle sigh, a genuine smile on her wrinkled mouth. She moved her hand on top of Jupiter’s and squeezed a little. Her skin felt glossy. “The ones you love are greater in your mind than the sun. Have you ever noticed that you feel cloudy without him?”

With widened eyes, she nodded. She most certainly had. She had been a hurricane without his loving sunshine.

“I’ve been in love many times, dear. Every time I meet a new man, it’s a perfect fairytale all over again. I can see the happy ending, I can hold it in my hand… but he doesn’t see it with the same eyes. The men I’ve had didn’t seem to understand how wonderful it could be.” She sighed in defeat. “But that’s how it goes.” A smile warmed her lips as she turned her head to Jupiter. Her hand pressed down again. “You can fall in love with anyone, you know.”

“I don’t know about that…” The young woman cast her eyes downward and screwed her lips in an awkward frown. Miss Mays was so warm that it was hard to remain cold inside. Which made her wonder… why was she reluctant to let the icicles in her melt?

“Believe me, honey. It’ll happen.” The old queen yawned and reached her arms out. Jupiter could almost hear the creaking in her bones. “Someday you’ll fall in love with someone that deserves you.”



“I want to show you something!” she exclaimed, dragging him by his hand. Noah tried hard to keep up with her; where had she gotten those legs!?

It was a day after they had reconnected. Jupiter had let him sleep on the couch. What a huge step that was in his mind. He was so close, now! He could almost feel her body on his for the first time in four years. He felt that he had earned her love, after all the hell he had gone through to get her back. But it was worth it. Oh, it was so worth it.

“Hurry up. You’re so slow!” They reached the ladder leading to the attic. Neither of them had bothered to replace it the night before; they had been too wrapped up in not being enemies.

Noah laughed and nudged her out of the way so he could get up before her. Her hand clamped down on the back of his ankle, pulling him down again. They were laughing together now, until they both somehow made it past the pull of gravity. They drifted through the sterile dust of the attic until they reached a small box that Jupiter pulled out of a shadow. It was sacred; she handled it like a treasure chest. As she opened it, the excitement in her eyes grew, until she was almost crying with happiness. “Here, here!” she said, shoving a leather-bound journal into his hands. In response to his curious look, she opened it and flipped to the first page for him.

His eyes fell to the scripture resting like a calm beast in his palms. It was written on, in her elegant handwriting.



Today, my mother came to visit. She was everything I’ve ever imagined.

Her hair is golden and long. It curls in all these weird places, but it works perfectly. She’s so very thin. I’m taller than her by an inch. I have her eyes.

She is very beautiful. She is very calm. She wanted to know where my sister was.

I had to lie, at first.