My Life As Sienna Brown
Part 153
As I drove home, I drove down the familiar main streets of Belleville that I used to walk to get to school. I approached an old, familiar street and was tempted to drive down it. It wasn't a proper time to be debating whether or not to turn, but I broke the law and turned, without a turning signal.
My car pulled out in front of a brick house and I sighed as I looked out towards it. Contemplating whether or not to go in was overwhelming at the assumption that the person inside didn't want anything to do with me anymore, and I wasn't quite sure just why.
It was this exact moment in time that I realized a very important thing about myself. I had admitted to being scared, everyone knew that fact. But there was something else. This was the second I realized that I was not only scared, I had become depressed. The real me wouldn't have made this assumption. The real me would know that Gerard Way was my friend, and he did, in deed, still care about me. The real me wouldn't be denying the fact that her best friend is dead. The real me wouldn't be trying to hold onto stupid things. The real me would not question the idea that I could make it through this; Frankie did care about me.
I needed to suck it up, and I was feeling desperate. If I couldn't patch things up with my parents, then maybe I could patch things up with Gee. I pulled the key out of the ignition and pushed open the car door, which locked automatically once I shut it.
I anxiously made my way up the driveway and knocked on the front door. Gerard's father opened it to greet me with a smile, "Hello Sienna."
"Hi," I greeted shyly.
"How are you?"
"I've been better," I sighed, laughing it off.
"Have you seen Jacob lately?"
I nodded. "Yea. I was just down there the other day." This was getting awkward.
"He's getting big," he stated.
I nodded awkwardly. "Hey, listen... Is Gerard here?"
"Oh, yea. Yea... I think he is. Just go ahead and let yourself in- I think he's in his room," he stated, sipping his coffee.
"Of course," I stated, slipping passed him and down the dark stairway towards the back of the house. At the bottom of the stairs, there was another hallway and the last door at the end had rays of sunlight beaming through the seams. It was Gerard's room and I quietly tip-toed towards it and creaked open the door.
My car pulled out in front of a brick house and I sighed as I looked out towards it. Contemplating whether or not to go in was overwhelming at the assumption that the person inside didn't want anything to do with me anymore, and I wasn't quite sure just why.
It was this exact moment in time that I realized a very important thing about myself. I had admitted to being scared, everyone knew that fact. But there was something else. This was the second I realized that I was not only scared, I had become depressed. The real me wouldn't have made this assumption. The real me would know that Gerard Way was my friend, and he did, in deed, still care about me. The real me wouldn't be denying the fact that her best friend is dead. The real me wouldn't be trying to hold onto stupid things. The real me would not question the idea that I could make it through this; Frankie did care about me.
I needed to suck it up, and I was feeling desperate. If I couldn't patch things up with my parents, then maybe I could patch things up with Gee. I pulled the key out of the ignition and pushed open the car door, which locked automatically once I shut it.
I anxiously made my way up the driveway and knocked on the front door. Gerard's father opened it to greet me with a smile, "Hello Sienna."
"Hi," I greeted shyly.
"How are you?"
"I've been better," I sighed, laughing it off.
"Have you seen Jacob lately?"
I nodded. "Yea. I was just down there the other day." This was getting awkward.
"He's getting big," he stated.
I nodded awkwardly. "Hey, listen... Is Gerard here?"
"Oh, yea. Yea... I think he is. Just go ahead and let yourself in- I think he's in his room," he stated, sipping his coffee.
"Of course," I stated, slipping passed him and down the dark stairway towards the back of the house. At the bottom of the stairs, there was another hallway and the last door at the end had rays of sunlight beaming through the seams. It was Gerard's room and I quietly tip-toed towards it and creaked open the door.