Painful Lullaby

I looked up through blurry eyes to see a girl who looked about my age crouching in front of me.

"Do I fucking look okay?" I snapped, then started another fit of crying. The girl took me in her arms and held onto me. She whispered something consoling, but I couldn't hear it.

Finally, I realized that I was crying on a stranger's shoulder, and I was probably soaking her shirt. I pulled back and wiped my eyes.

"So, stranger. What's your name?" She asked, helping my wipe the tears away.

"R-Roxie," I whispered.

"It's a fancy meeting you, Roxie. My name is Eva Clark. Now can you tell me why you're out here. I mean, you do know you're sitting on the side of the road, right?" She murmured the last part, hiding her mouth like she was telling me a secret.

"My b-boyfriend and I broke u-up," I whispered. Eva nodded in understanding.

"Those damn men," she said, shaking her fist. I giggled.

"Alright then, missy. It's about time you came to my house," she said, standing up and tugging on the sleeve of my shirt.

"What?"

"Well, I'm not just gonna leave you out here. I mean, you could get hit by a deer or something," she said it completely serious, which made me laugh again. I stood up and walked with her. We didn't talk for the entire walk, which was quite long. It had started to rain a little bit which just made everything worse. I looked at Eva, she looked like she was just having a wonderful time, spinning and singing. She was so carefree that it made my heart ache.

But I was drawn to her at the same time. Her laughter, her smile, her voice. It was like a remedy for my broken heart.

Broken Heart Remedy.

Well, hell. Who knew my ex-boyfriend's band name would serve as a description of a girl I met after breaking up with him?

Oh, are you falling in love with her? I always knew you were a faggot. That's why you broke up with that Jag. Because you were a fag.

"Alright Miss Roxie, this is my house," Eva said as we approached a large farmhouse. It was huge, two stories and a basement from what I could tell.

"You...you don't have to do this," I whispered, my voice scratchy.

"Well I'm not gonna leave you out here!" She exclaimed, telling me this for a second time. I didn't bother arguing, since arguing doesn't get you anywhere. I'm a prime example of that.

She's using you.

Eva pulled me down a hallway and opened a door. The sign on the door said it was Eva's, so I followed her in. She shut the door as I looked around. The room was huge and messy. The bed was large and unmade, the pale blue walls were covered in band posters, bands that I listened to. The carpet was a dark green and was covered with clothes and boxes.

"Sorry that it's a little messy. We just moved in, and I haven't had much time to...y'know. Unpack," she explained sheepishly. She went over to her bed and threw all the blankets on the ground.

"What are you...?"

"Sit." She commanded as she herself plopped down on the bed. She patted a place across from her, and I sat down. She reached over and grabbed a box of tissues from her bedside table, throwing them down in front of me.

"Now you explain to me what happened. Nothing will get better unless you talk about it. I'm not going to judge you," Eva said.

So I told her everything. How my mom beat me, how I'd run from the cops, fucked up, and passed out in some old ladies lawn. When I went to the park and met Jag, when we'd talked, when Donny cleaned my wounds. When I found out that Jag wasn't eating, when we had people over, when Jag broke up with me the first time, all about those four days, and then when I tried to kill myself. How he'd found me, how he'd stayed awake with me for three days. When we went to Veronica's, when we'd fucked, when Zoe had found us. Up to the point where I found out that I was pregnant and my most recent argument with Jag.

Eva sat and intently listened the entire time, patiently waiting every time I broke down in tears.

"So, I'm assuming that your stuff is still at his house?" Eva asked when I'd finished. I nodded.

"Well then, Miss Roxie, let's go get it!" Eva hopped off of her bed, "Can you ride a bike?"

__________

Eva and I had silently biked to Jag's. Well, almost silently. She'd asked me my last name, and I'd told her. We rounded the corner, and I pointed at his house.

"That's it," I whispered. Being back to it so soon was like poking at an old wound. Actually, if Eva had told me correctly, I'd been out all night, and this was the next day. I couldn't believe that I'd been out all night. Eva and I dumped our bikes in Donny's yard. I figured that I would apologize to him for yelling at him yesterday. I'd given Eva detailed directions on where my things were.

I'm not going to lie to you, I was scared shitless. My heart was pounding as fast as a humming birds.

I watched as Eva crossed the yard, then pounded on the door. Jag answered it. There was somebody behind him.

"Hello, Ethan. My name is Eva Clark and I'm here on behalf of a Miss Roxie Fischer, who is demanding her shit back," Eva said, shoving her way into the house. As she shoved them, I seen who the girl was.

Brandy McDay, my friend.