Innocently Guilty

I rolled over, still half asleep, and fell onto a person. I forced myself to open my eyes, to a tan back underneath me. I rolled off, and up off the bed. I quickly noticed my nude body, and grabbed some strewn clothes of mine off the floor. I quietly walked onto my balcony, and sat down, enjoying the cool brisk morning before the heat swelled to the regular suffocation level.

I sat in one of the chairs, leaning my head on my arm, watching the birds fly across the newly risen sun. I thought about how peaceful it was, and how life felt good. Then about how...he... was coming. I felt my heart quicken, my pulse race, and my fear wash over my body as easy as a wave could.

I stood up, and leaned onto the railing. I was hyperventilating, and I wanted to stop. The fear would not go away. Not even Jeremy could do that. What was I going to do? Call him and tell him your not ready, Sophie. Call... Jack. The beautifully scary, Jack.

Just then, my phone rang, and I screamed. I quickly looked over and heard nothing from inside the house. I slowly brought the phone to my face, and sighed in relief. It was just Lauren.

"H-hello," I said, trying to make my voice even.

"Oh, I was just going to leave a voice-mail. You are actually up, dang. Well that is even better. Want to go to the beach today? You can bring Davy and Jeremy, if you want?"

I looked out at the rising sun, and smiled, trying to forget the Jack situation.

"Yeah sure, you call Davy for me. I can ask Jeremy. Meet you at the beach, at our spot, ok?

"Sure thing, see you in thirty!" Lauren said hanging up. Instead of getting ready, I opened my phone to dial another number. My mother's.

"Hello, you have called the Nevada-" I quickly hung up, afraid of an answer. I will call later. I walked back inside, to get ready. I quickly changed into my bikini, and a tank top and pair of shorts. I slipped a pair of sunglasses on, and took a backpack from my closet. I'd raid the kitchen in a few minutes for our all day beach event.

I finally threw a stuffed animal at Jeremy's head, and he shrugged a little.

"Hey you, wake up. I have to ask you something. God don't be a little bitch," I said joking around. I heard him chuckle, as he turned around.

"What do you want? Waking me up at seven o'clock." He leaned onto his elbows, and I became shortly distracted by his exposed chest. I mentally shook it off, and smiled.

"Lauren, Davy, and I are going to the beach. Want to come?" His face fell, and I frowned. "Or, it's OK, we don't really want you there anyways." I turned and walked out of my room, towards the kitchen.

"Sophie, wait! I would like to go, but my friends have been pissed at me. Ditching them, so I promised I would hang with them. Maybe another day?" I looked at him, up and down. God his pecks were beautiful. How could you say no to a god like body like his?

"It's fine, and sure. Have fun," I said opening the fridge and sticking in three waters, a few monsters, and then grabbed a big box of goldfish. I saw him frown while I was turned, through the microwave reflection, which made me smile. "It is really fine. Go hang with your douche bag friends. Maybe the "new" you will rub off on them. Come on go get ready. We know you take three hours." I saw a smile crack onto his face, and he walked to his room.

I walked out into the hallway, and waited for the elevator to come. It was taking long. When it opened, I grew furious. Inside were Jeremy's two friends and Davy. I felt bad about having him in the same elevator as them. They were bullying him into a corner, where he clung.

"You two oafs get off of him, now! I swear!" I said dropping my backpack and sunglasses on the floor. They turned toward me, and I glared.

"Oh is the little kiddie from before going to beat us both up. Will this nerdy ass kid help you too? Aren't we afraid, Kyle?" One said to the other, whom I guess was the Kyle. Davy was giving me a look of help and a "run as fast as you can" look. I shook my head.

"Yes, I fucking will, so get your fatass hands off of him, and get out of the damn elevator." I yelled, getting pissed. They walked away from Davy, and pushed me back against the wall. I never showed fear, because I had none.

"Yeah, Alex. Too bad we can't hit a girl." Kyle said, fake sighing.

"Kyle, to me, she isn't a girl. Just a worthless, piece of shit." I saw his fist come flying at me, but I moved, letting it impact with the wall. He howled in pain, but continued.

"Come on you pussies can do better. I am just a piece of shit. Grow a pair already!" I said, moving backwards, quickly but slowly at the same time. It was like a movie.

"Sophie, no." Davy whispered, they turned toward him, and he froze. They turned back to me, and I signaled Davy to run away from here. They would actually break his bones but maybe just bruise me.

"Ha! Grow a pair, hmm? You wish you could see that, you little tramp. Yeah you are a whore, slut, hoe, and a skank!" Alex said pushing towards me. I grew furious beyond what I ever had. I saw Davy running to my apartment, banging on the door. I turned away as it opened to a confused Jeremy.

"Hey bitch, why don't you suck my dick. You mother fuckers. Or you can suck each others cause you can't get any besides from your fatass, drunken, mothers who's pussies are stretched out farther then the Mississippi River!" I screamed, kneeing Alex and punching Kyle in the face before his hands grabbed me. They fell to the floor, wincing in pain.

"Next time you mess with Davy, I will beat the shit out of you. Next time you call me names; I will beat the shit out of you. Come on Davy, we have a day at the beach waiting for us." I said grabbing my sunglasses and backpack. I heard two people running down the hallway. Davy got here first and jumped into the elevator. I let it close, as Jeremy stopped in front of it. He looked at his beat up friends, then me.

"I'm sorry," he said as it closed. I just looked away, and Davy stared at me.

"Your amazing. Unlike me. I should have just helped." Davy bent his head in humiliation and I smiled.

"No, I like taking those two on by myself. I would have killed you if you helped," I said seriously. His eyes grew large, and I laughed. He finally smiled as we stepped out and began walking to Lauren and my favorite beach spot. It was usually deserted, because it was unpopular.

We finally arrived, ten minutes late. Lauren clearly noticed and did not want to drop it. Davy then had to explain the whole "fight" scene, and she just laughed and nodded.

"Yeah, that sounds like her. Miss. The-Shit, are you not as cocky now so we can have fun at the beach?" I laughed and nodded as we made our way to our "spot". We set up our crap, and sprayed on a little sunscreen.

"Okay, bitches. Last in the water has to... go hug that fat man after rubbing on some sunscreen for him." I said, getting ready to run. I had my bets on who would win. Davy. He had experience with running away from bullies and what not.

"One!" I screamed. They were set and ready, as I smiled.

"Two" I said, looking at Lauren, then at Davy.

"Three!" We were all off, and Davy clearly got ahead quicker. I slowly saw myself fall behind Lauren by mere milliseconds. Davy hit the water, and then Lauren and I did. Lauren got there one second before me. I groaned and fell into the water, as a small wave rushed over.

They were literally rofling in the water, as I splashed them. We hopped waves, and pretended to be sea animals. Lauren was being a fish, and then screamed.

"What’s wrong!?" I screamed as me and Davy floated still.

"I felt a fish, lets get out!" She screamed running out. Davy and me looked at each other and screamed, thrashing out after her. We collapsed by our stuff, laughing while Lauren hyperventilated.

"Your such a bitch, Lauren," I said finally letting my laughs slip away.

"Hey bitch, go fulfill the bet. Come on." I glared at her then got up, and walked over to the man. I heard Davy choking on the goldfish he just put in his mouth, as he began laughing.

"Excuse me sir. I am in a class about properly putting on sunscreen, and I am supposed to do it to three people as an assignment. Could I?" I asked, lying and stifling back my laughter and disgust.

"Well I'm just leaving, but.... sure!" I picked up his sunscreen, and lathered all around him. He smiled, and I smiled in return. When I finished rubbing it on him, seductively to get more laughs from Lauren and Davy, I gave him a big hug, and said good-bye. I felt sticky, nasty, and dirty.

"That was amazing! So glad you lost. On the other hand, should I say won? You liked that man! Lauren said trying to calm herself down, as I glared. I drank a full monster quickly, and grabbed my cell once Davy said I got a text message. I opened it up, and read the message.

It was from Jack, saying he would be here tomorrow night. I looked down, at my friends as they put on some music and lay out. Lauren was sleeping, and Davy was reading a magazine. I shut my cell and threw it in my bag.

"Hey guys, I-I'm going to go wash this crap off. They did not hear me, but I figured they knew that is what I would do. I quickly walked down to the ocean, and jumped in, swimming out to where it rose to my shoulder blades. I rubbed my body clean not even noticing. Everything seemed so unreal but real. I did not notice the waves getting bigger.

All I could think of was Jack. I could call the cops. Then they might just take me away, put me somewhere special. Tell me what to do. I thought of as to why jack would do this now. My mom was gone, and I told him how my Dad and Step-mom were leaving this early morning for a wine special in California. I was all alone. I hit myself literally for telling a stranger these things.

But he wasn't a stranger to me then. Stupid, foolish girl. I started to cry, floating quietly, not paying attention as my surroundings slowly slipped by me. What was the point of life, anyways? Why was it so difficult and mean? Who was out there for me?

Jeremy. I realized right then that that boy means a lot to me. No, I have not known him for long, but he was always there for me. When I was drunk, when I was scared. I smiled, and let the peace around me overwhelm me. I will be okay, yeah. I looked up, and my eyes grew in horror. I had literally drifted so far out; I could not see Lauren and Davy over the waves. I had also gone very far away, so even if I could see I would not be able to, I drifted.

"Oh my god. HELP!" I screamed, trying to swim forward. The first thing I thought of were sharks. I tensed up and stayed still, unsure what to do. A huge wave crashed over me, and I tumbled under water, shells jabbing into my back. I finally got up for air, gasping. I got pulled back out, as I struggled. I quickly pulled out the shells, and felt my back, shoulders, and knees. They were all scraped, and bleeding.

"Fuck my fucking life fucking." I said, thinking about more sharks. No, there would not be any sharks. As I searched the ocean quickly, I felt my legs get stung. I screamed in pain. A damn jellyfish was near. I tried swimming away, but the current was too strong against my battered body. I tried to calm myself down, failing. Singing always helps. I began to sing the first song that came into mind. 1901 by Phoenix.

"Counting all different ideas, drifting away..." I thought of the irony, and laughed aloud. "Past and present they don't matter, now the futures sorted out," I sang feeling my body calm down. That is true, I'm going to make a new future. "Watch her moving in elliptical patterns." So true, I thought. I have been going in that kind of pattern in real life, and in this damn forsaken water. Calm down.

"Think it's not what you say. What you say is way too complicated," I sang, thinking all these words were right for me. I kept singing, and realizing my purpose, and how I acted. I got to the part where it said "Lie down you know its easy" and I forced myself to not, give up, but keep trying to get out, even though just to float on my back would be so nice and easier.

"Fold it, fold it, fold it, fold it..." I sang, letting it drift away as I stared at a massive wave coming towards me. I screamed in fear and began thrashing forward, to try to run it out. I was making no distance. I screamed one more time, hoping someone would here, as the wave crashed over me, rolling me under water. I could not come up for air, and I felt fear as the rest of the song played in my head.

I remember coming up, and being swamped with another wave, and as I went under my head slamming hard into the ground. I went unconscious after that, letting everything slip away as my last thoughts were:

"I need to call into Starbucks, or I'm sure to be fired"