Remembering Sunday

Most people leave their homes because they need to get away from the ordinary and do something extraordinary.

This wasn't the case for me.

I couldn't go back to either of my homes and I wasn't doing anything extraordinary. Unless you counted a baby growing inside of me extraordinary. I had absolutely no where to go and I had no idea where in New Jersey I was now. The miles seemed to grow longer the farther away I got. My methods of transportation? My feet and the NJ Transit Buses. Occasionally I'd look to see where the buses were headed, but I grew so tired that I didn't bother to look anymore. The buses allowed me to catch up on a few lost hours of sleep, but I had to get off when night rolled around. What city was I in now? No idea, but I had a feeling it was north of Jackson. There were thousands of different races mixed in the crowds I wandered with, and the violence was out of control in the concrete kissed city. I assumed I was in Trenton.

And then it hit me.

If I was in Trenton, I could take the Riverline train to Burlington City or Camden and find a place to stay. The only downside that nipped at my heels was the fact that the city might not even be Trenton. I peered around for any signs that might indicate the city. I fixed my bag on my shoulder and hurried down a sidewalk, passing what appeared to be a gang. One of the members, tanned skin and of Italian heritage, grinned at me, but I kept my eyes to the ground and kept walking. Apparently it had to be dangerous walking around this city after dark, and, lucky me, I was stuck right in the middle of the midnight hour. I was awake, but not enough to last until the morning.

"Ay, where ya goin', beautiful?" the man called. My body switched to a brisk walk as I heard their laughter fade behind me along with the sound of their heavy footsteps. Don't look back, don't look back. As I turned the next corner, an empty road and sidewalk stretched out before me, my hopes dropping into the pit of my stomach.

Lost. Just perfect.

I trudged on forward, wishing I could find some normal looking person that wasn't stoned or drunk to talk to. As I turned the next corner, I found myself wandering down a graffitti stricken path. Every inch of the building's walls were covered in rainbows of spray paint, words and symbols mixed among it all. There was a huge name painted right along the wall in black and red, taking up most of the space. It was surrounded by smaller works in shades of blue and purple. I swallowed roughly and continued on, knowing that if I turned back, I'd be right where I'd started.

I hoped for a street light of some sort on the next path. Judging by the rays of light I hoped I saw peeking around the corner of a building, there was one there. However, I saw a shadow of a man cast along the ground, but there was something in his hand.

A gun.

My eyes widened and I whipped around to run back.

Big mistake.

I smacked myself right into the Italian gang member, his grin larger than before. My breath was caught in a wild gasp as he laughed and pushed me into a nearby alley. I hit the ground with a thud, the cold dirt hard against my side. He grabbed my arm and yanked me onto my feet, instantly shoving me against a brick wall. His face was just inches from mine, his breath smelling of beer and cigarettes. A strong, feminine smell of cotton candy was fuming off of him, but it was mixed with the awful stench of some sort of cologne. He wrapped his grubby hands around my neck, and out of instinct, my hands reached up and grasped his. His fingers tightened, making a cough choke out of me.

"Why'd you run away, beautiful?" he asked. A few other dark skinned members filled in behind him. A lump formed in my throat, right where his hands met my neck. I didn't answer, for I had forgotten how to speak.

"Well? What's wrong, babe? Cat got your tongue?" he asked.

"Please let me go," I whimpered. The man chuckled and leaned in, planting a kiss on my neck. I stiffened and tried to hide my neck, but it was no use. He kissed again and again, my muscles tensing every time his lips brushed my skin. Finally he pulled bakc to look at me, the same sly grin playing up his lips.

"Let me go," I demanded.

"Now why would I do that? It's not often I come across someone as pretty as you," he said. He nodded suddenly and one of the men beihnd him stepped forward and opened my bag.

"Take what you want and let me go," I said.

"Just relax, baby. You're not going anywhere," he cooed as the other man rifled through my bag. Stupid bald-headed son of a bitch.

"Ain't nothin' in here, just a bunch of clothes," the accomplise said angrily.

"Clothes, eh?" the man said thoughtfully. "Where ya headed,
sweetheart?"

"None of your business," I said, trying to toughen my voice up.

"Of course it's my business. I want to make sure you get there safe and soundly." The accomplise moved onto my other bags, riffling through the other contents.

"Well, well, well, what do we have here?" the accomplise chimed mockingly. He removed my favorite picture of Seth from my bag and studied it with a devilish grin.

"Put it back," I warned.

"Why? Who's this? Your boyfriend?" he teased. He grabbed one edge.

"No!" I screamed, but the picture had already been torn into three pieces. They fell to the ground as tears fell from my eyes.

"What's the matter? You miss him?" he asked. I nodded somberly and looked at my feet.

"Ah, don't be a baby." The man shifted his hands around my neck. "If you're not with him, there's probably a good reason why."

I didn't repsond to that. Instead, I felt a bit of rebellion. My knee jerked upward, smashing right into the Italian man's center of gravity with as much force as I could manage. His eyes widened and he instantly released my neck to throw his hands to his groin, his body meeting the ground with a heavy thud. I turned to run out of the alley, but the two accomplises grabbed my arms and threw me back against the wall. My head smacked into the bricks, a horrible pain beginning to grow there. The man groaned loudly, muttering curses under his breath. When he finally recovered, he had the look of the devil in his eyes.

"You think you can get away that easily?" he threatened.

"Please just let me go, that's all I'm asking. I'm pregnant and this is just too much. Please," I begged hysterically. "I just want to go home."

What home?

"Pregnant, huh?" The man grinned and put a hand under my tank top and onto my stomach. His touch felt grimy and sweaty, adding to the unpleasant mess of a situation.

"Please don't hurt my baby," I pleaded.

"Now why would I do such a thing?" he asked, but there was a slyness to his words. He pulled one hand back, clenched it into a fist, and slammed it into my stomach. I gasped loudly at the awful pain, wishing I could clutch my stomach and make it vanish.

The baby! No, no, no!

The fear of the punch drastically altering my pregnancy, and the baby if it made it after that. I bent my head over, tears streaming down my cheeks for the upteenth time.

"How's that feel?" he taunted. I didn't speak a word.

"Check her pockets," he ordered the two other men as he took control over my arms. The men slid their hands into my front pockets, feeling around and causing me great discomfort. The man on my right got a little touchy-feely with my thigh, and the other just searched. He wrapped his thick fingers around the money I had stashed in that pocket, a devilish grin appearing on his face.

"Hey, Kenny," he said as he removed the money. "Jackpot."

The leader, Kenny, grinned and snatched it away, qucikly counting the several twenties I had. "A beautiful thousand," he mused. "Just wonderful."

"Just take it and let me go," I whispered. "I have nothing else."

"Oh, no, love. You do have something else that I want," Kenny remarked as he stepped forward and leaned against me. The other two men released me as Kenny took control, holding my hands down.

"No," I stated in devastation. "No, no, no!" I let out a scream, just trying to grab someone's attention. Kenny growled and pressed his lips down hard against mine, just to get me to shut up.

"What's the matter, baby?" he asked against my lips. "Need more?"

"Fuck off!" I screamed as I turned my head away. Kenny growled and hooked me in the stomach again.

My baby had to be dead.

Kenny kissed me again before quickly popping the button on my jeans. Furious, I snapped.

Once again, I jabbed my knee into his family jewels, causing Kenny to yelp and back away. "You little shit!" he yelled angrily. I quickly sweeped up the remains of Seth's picture like a hawk, pocketed them, and hauled ass out of the alley.

"Don't just stand there, you assholes! Get her!" Kenny yelled, his voice a tad off. I pushed myself as hard as my pregnant body would allow me, which wasn't very much. Every step was a challenge, and I could hear distant footsteps behind me. My long legs carried me quickly, but my stomach was knotted and I had no idea where I was headed. The graffitti buildings died slowly, the paths became more properly lit, and a few people were actually on the sidewalks. However, I rudely pushed past all of them.

And then my prayers were answered.

Attached to the top of a streetlight was a large sign that read "RIVERLINE" with an arrow pointing in its direction. I turned and zipped down the path, desperate to make the train and get out of this nightmare. Angry yells came form behind me, propelling me to run faster.

There it was. Glowing bright in the night sat the Riverline Station, the train beginning to board. The city lights reflected off the white, blue, and yellow exterior of the train. The tracks sat upon white gravel and were separated from the street with white concrete mediums. I illegally darted across the tracks and onto the platform. However, once I stepped foot on the train, the woman driving stopped me.

"Ma'am, where's your boarding money?" she asked.

"What?" I asked breathlessly.

"It's a dollar fifty to ride this train. No money, no ride," she stated.

"I'll find it," I said, slumping down into a nearby seat. Everyone aboard the train shot me annoyed and dirty looks, causing me to flush red and hurry my search through my bag.

"You'd better have that money," the woman said.

I nodded sheepishly and glanced out the window. The two men stood on the sidewalk outside the train, glancing around for me. I ducked down, pressing my body against the floor.

"What's the matter with you?" the woman snapped. I peeked up at her.

"Those two men outside, they just assaulted me. They took everything valueable I had," I sniffed. "That's the only reason I'm on this train. I need an escape." My heart hurt as I realized again that my baby may be dead from the punches.

"Oh, damn. Are you alright, ma'am?" the woman asked politely. The tension in the air softened, and I shook my head somberly as I sat back up.

"This is all I have," I said as I deposited four shiny quarters into the box and sulked back against the wall.

"Here," the woman deposited the other fifty cents into the box as the train began to roll down the tracks. "Thank you," I whispered weakly.

"Just don't speak of it, okay?" She turned away and focused on driving. Black signs hung above the seats, the location running across them in green font. "To: Burlington City." I had been there before, and it was more peaceful than Camden and Trenton, so I figured I'd stay there a while.

My eyes slowly closed as I rested my hands on my stomach, my fingers tracing my skin and a lump forming in my throat. I prayed my baby was okay, that he or she would make it through this with me. All I could do was wait. It was too early for an ultrasound.

I slipped my hand into my hoodie pocket and removed the tattered pieces of Seth's picture. His face had been ripped right down the center and to the side, forming three separate pieces. I tried to fit them back together, but it didn't work well at all. His right eye was staring at me in one of the pieces, and the glare was so strong it felt as through he was right there with me. I placed the pieces securely into one of my bags before letting myself fade out from the world.