Status: I'm back :D

I Don't Believe You

The Start of the Beginning

“So, Ellie, what would you like to talk about today?” She gazed patiently at the fourteen year old girl who refused to meet her eyes.

“I don’t know.” She slowly rubbed a scuff out of the black leather couch she was perched on. Ellie didn’t want to be here.

“Well, what has your summer been like so far? Are you missing eighth grade? ” She was searching for clues as to why Ellamae’s parents believe she is starting to become distant from the rest of the family. As a professional, she had to get answers for Ellie’s odd behavior lately.

Ellie sighed and looked past the cream curtains at the small town’s City Hall. Next to that was the library, and then came the ice cream parlor where many kids her age were; sitting on the picnic benches alongside the building, laughing in their current haven. That’s not where Ellie wanted to be though. She longed to be back at her home, where she had the freedom to do as she pleased. She wanted to use that freedom and walk down the dirt path she created through the woods.

Strolling along inside the tree-tunnel, past all the dark green leaves and vines

“Ellamae?”

Breaking through the thicket and approaching the gate

“Ellie?”

Pushing through the fog to find his stone

“Ellie, what are you thinking about?”

Smiling when he waves

“Ellie!”

Waving back

“Ellamae, look at me this instant!” Her head snapped up to the middle aged woman who looked slightly frazzled. “Are you sure there isn’t anything you want to talk about?”

Keeping the faint smile that was etched on her slim face, Ellie’s eyes wandered back to the parlor children. “Positive.”

The woman wrote about three lines down before closing her notepad, hesitating before slipping the cap on the pen. Deciding nothing would come of sitting in silence, Dr. Patton dismissed the young girl, promising to see her again soon.

>>FF>>

My eyes drifted from stone to stone, leaving behind my Ford as each name led the way to the back half of the cemetery. Two years since I’ve seen his beautiful face without having to wake up sweating.Two years since I’ve even made it past the gates again. Two years of hoping, and praying for his resting soul.

When I first met him, it was the day before my fourteenth birthday party which was a week after my actual birthday. I had invited him to come to the party. A small smile glowed before he let me down gently. The next day was beautiful, and I spent it moping in my room, only coming out for presents. I’ll admit that when I first met him I was a bit obsessed, but I was young, naïve if you will. I came here every day that summer. Listened to his stories, watched his features dance with emotion. Anyone would find it near impossible to believe he wasn’t really alive.

The forget-me-not’s stem that rested in the palm of my hand seemed to weigh down my fingers with every passing tombstone. My foot prints made the dew disappear from the tips of the grass in the early morning. My hands started to shake and my eyes water as I watched his name come into view. The thought that he would never be able to see the light of day on Earth again made things worse. I was the reason for his absence today and maybe every day after this.

Why am I even here? To torture myself?

No.

I’m here today, at four twenty one in the morning, to obey what he asked me to do for him. He explained everything in my dream, as ludicrous as that sounds.

No, I’m not crazy. No, I don’t need help. No, I don’t need a life.

I’m slightly sane in my eyes. I’ve gotten the help I never needed.

This is my life . . .He is my life.

Enjoy the ride.