People Got A Lotta Nerve

As far as I was concerned, Oliver and the rest of Bring Me The Horizon coming into town had somehow transformed my life- with the drama with Emma now some kind of slowing healing wound, the boys had somehow managed to distract me from her entirely, and I had begun to finally live. Living, I was beginning to learn, had nothing really to do with the ability my lungs had to breathe, or the rate in which my heart pumped blood. Life was found in every kiss Oliver planted on my neck, or in every laugh I shared with the boys over one of Matt’s lame jokes, or in every late night movie everyone tried watching, but fell asleep by 2am for, all of them strewn about my living room, their soft snores bringing life into my house once again. I was happy, cooking for them, Lee and Curtis even clearing off my table, Oliver helping set up the tableware. It was only for a few days, but I was really beginning to enjoy their sarcastic jokes and witty banter.

It was the night before their show, which ironically happened to be at a different venue, The Epicentre, which was only a few blocks from my house. It was smaller than Soma, but that didn’t seem to bother them one bit. In fact, Oliver said that he preferred it. He liked the closer, more intimate vibe I guess. And he liked stage diving on fans.

“Aye Oli, pass the pepper, yeah?” Lee asked, between bites. The great thing about feeding 20 year old boys was that no matter how shitty my food was, they ate it, every last bite. That night I had made spaghetti, peppered with random vegetables like squash and bell peppers. Earlier that day, I had sent Lee, Curtis and silent Matt on a shopping expedition at the grocery store, not trusting Matt Nicholls or Oliver with my car or to bring home the right stuff. Matt had hinted earlier that all he wanted was Jack Daniels, and when Oliver laughed and tapped their coke cans together, exclaiming ‘Cheers mate!’ I knew it would be in my best interests to keep them in with me. If it was anyone else but Oliver and Matt though, this wouldn’t have been so difficult. I had Matt mixing drinks using the limited girly alcohol I had, and Oliver was helping me wash dishes, I washing, he drying. Somehow though, my kitchen had turned into some underground rap battle ground, and before I knew it, I had met ‘Womb 2 Da Tomb’.

Oliver, not bothering to stop eating, grabbed the pepper shaker off the table and tossed it half heartedly in Lee’s direction. Thankfully, Lee caught it, and turned it upside down over his plate.

It was weird, having them all together like this, but having no conversation., or no little fights. Those were the most entertaining, just like Lee and Matt’s sock/napkin fight in Vegas. Since they’ve been here, I had walked out of my shower to Curtis and Lee sword fighting with my drafting sticks, which are basically glorified meter sticks stuck together. They were useful for school, and frankly not mine, so I instantly freaked out, chasing them around my couch and into the kitchen with just a pair of boxers and a t-shirt on, before they were cornered and forced to hand back the design equipment. Another time, I had walked into the kitchen, minding my own business, when Matt Nicholls, dressed in a ridiculously convincing ninja costume, jumped out from behind the refrigerator and threw paper ninja stars at me! I just stood there in shock, my plan to get some cranberry juice clearly put on the back burner, my new number one goal was to figure out why the hell some grown man was running around my house pretending to be a ninja. The look on his face was classic- as soon as he realized it was me, and not his prime target (who I later discovered was Lee), the color drained out of his face and he shuffled past me, clearly embarrassed. He did stop though, to pick up all his ninja stars. A few minutes later, Lee walked out of the bathroom and into a vicious guerilla attack from Ninja Matt.

Ever since Oliver and I got back from the amusement park, Oliver and I seemed to be inseparable, choosing to sleep in my bed with me instead of heading back to the hotel with the boys, helping me with my daily chores, like washing the dishes or folding my laundry. It was funny, and endearing, having to show Oliver the proper way to fold a shirt, or how to properly hang jeans in the closet. He would furrow his brow when trying it for himself, and roll his eyes and laugh at me when I showed him my closet, completely color coded and organized by size and function.

At night, once the boys went to bed, I could feel Oliver’s walls coming down, his hands finding my waist, his lips finding mine. When the others were here, he would stay close to me, but we never did anything ‘romantic’; it was a guy thing I guess. It didn’t bother me too much, even if I didn’t understand it. Besides, it was nice just having another body, especially his body, back in my house, in my bed, keeping me warm and safe, and content.

---

Time never stops moving, especially when you’re having fun. So, when the night of the show finally rolled around, I was disappointed, but not surprised. Due to sound checks and other band-ish things I didn’t understand, the boys had to leave super early. Before going though, Oliver made sure to pull me in for a hug and a kiss, his hands slipping a backstage pass in my back pocket as his lips pressed against mine.

I finally decided to get going around 6:30, the show starting at 7. Unfortunately, my anxiety ridden, overanalyzing self had not been completely lost over the last few days, and just like clockwork, as soon as they drove away, my nerves began to creep up my spine and take a death grip around my thoughts. I had stared at my closet for a good 20 minutes, countless outfits running through my head, each of them deemed ‘unacceptable.’ I wanted to dress to impress, but not look like I was trying too hard, even though I probably was. I knew I wouldn’t be in the crowd, but watching from the sides, thanks to this backstage pass. So, proper shoes were not an issue, as with having to wear jeans. Because of this, I had finally decided on a simple black v-necked spaghetti strapped shirt, and a high waisted teal skirt, complete with lace detailing at the hem and everything. For shoes, I had decided on my black flats, thinking comfort would be key. It took me longer to straighten and do my hair, and apply just the right amount of make up, but I did, and still managed to get to The Epicentre before 7.

By the time I got there, it was only 10 minutes until things were supposed to start, and the boys were definitely pumped, Matt beating out random drum beats, Lee and Curtis talking about some thing they were going to do on stage together, Oliver sitting on the couch, his head in his hands.

I decided to sneak up slowly, keeping my mouth shut. I sat down next to him, and brushed my side up against his, just letting him know I was there. I couldn’t see his face, but he shifted against me also, his way of letting me know he knew I was there. I know how people can get before performing, be it angry screaming music, or before a soccer game or something. I did not want to break that concentration, shake him out of ‘the zone’. I just wanted to be there, to let him know I’d be watching, from stage left, being the best support system I could. This was what he loved to do, and I was so excited that he had the opportunity to do it, and to share it with all the kids who looked up to them.

The Matts, Lee and Curtis went on stage first, the music bursting out of the amplifiers and out of Matt’s drum kit, only missing the piercing screams and ‘brutal’ lows of Oliver’s voice. I had left him alone, giving his knee a tiny squeeze before taking up my place on the side of the stage, trying to fit myself to where I could see Oliver, but not have the fans see me. I don’t know why, it was just a comfort thing. Again.

All of a sudden, I felt a familiar hand snake around my waist, and let me go just like that, in seconds fast. Then, Oliver came into vision, running on stage, the cord of the microphone wrapped loosely once over around his neck, the hot pink duct tape bright against his skin.

“How’s everybody doing tonight, good?” I could see him smile into the microphone, the crowd cheering insanely.

I knew this was what he loved to do.

---

The show had ended, my eardrums thanking the heavens over and over. They had went through their entire set, Oliver reaching into the fans, the fans screaming and desperately grabbing at him, Lee and Curtis doing guitar flips, everything going smoothly. I cant say I particularly like what kind of music they do, but I can appreciate it, especially when I see the looks on their faces when he show is over.

“You did amazing.” I smiled, Oliver’s hand grabbing mine as the band walked back into the dressing room.

“Could have gone better.” He said, every inch of him covered in sweat.

“I don’t think so, the crowd loved you.”

He shook his head, and grabbed a bottle of water off of a table. Twisting open the cap and tilting it onto his lips, he drank the entire thing in one sitting. When he was finally finished, his eyes rested back on mine, a big smile taking hold on his face.

I smiled back, taking in all of his features. I couldn’t get the thought out of my head of how cute he looked when his hair began to flip out after being wet.

“Doesn’t matter now, does it?” I loved that smile he just gave, the one with all the teeth. “Its time for the real fun to begin, love.”

“Yeah? What’s next?”

“Well, I’ve thought we could get pissed!”

“….You don’t want to see me mad at you…” I cocked my head to the side, my feet shifting uncomfortably in my flats below me.

All of a sudden, Oliver’s smile faded, and he stared at me wide eyed. I stared back, unsure of what was happening. All of a sudden, he scoffed loudly, slapping his palm to his forehead.

“Pissed….as in drunk.”

“Oh!” I smiled huge, in an attempt to cover up my ridiculous misstep. “I’m still figuring out this English thing…”

He stepped closer to me and laughed, taking my face in his hands and bringing his lips down to mine, the kiss lingering just a little bit longer than what was probably socially acceptable.

“You’re the cutest girl I have ever known. I meant, its time to party, love. Everyone’s back at the bus, or the hotel, somewhere. Waiting for us.”

I tried to reach up on my tip toes, keep my lips to his, but he was just too tall. I nodded, and took his hand back in mine. “Well, let’s go then!”

The party, which ended up being back at the hotel the boys had been in the past few days, was actually really fun! Since all of the boys had a passion for Jack Daniels, I had to run out on my own alcohol run, purchasing the tall, skinny blue bottle of Hypnotiq Vodka, my favorite. I love any kind of vodka, Grey Goose being my favorite, but it is always way too expensive. Hypnotiq is good because of its fruity after taste, which makes the burn of hard liquor much more bearable. I was just drinking it straight too, seeing as though by the time I got back, all of the 7-Up was gone, and coke and fruity vodka just don’t mix. It was fine though, I got proper drunk in less than an hour, holding onto Oliver’s side for balance as I laughed and giggled like a 4th grade schoolgirl, laughing even more heavily at Matt’s jokes, my knees actually buckling once during one of Oliver’s kisses, which got more sloppy and haphazard.

The party was great, actually, until I felt Oliver’s grip on my waste tighten, his fingers pressing into the teal fabric of my skirt. I looked up, expecting to see the cops or something, but instead, there was Emma, the red heels towering into the sky, a red plastic up in her hand sloshing with alcohol as she burst into the room.