NineteenYearsLater

I awoke the next morning with a crick in my neck and an uncomfortable feeling that I wasn’t in the same place as when I went to sleep. I opened my eyes and let out a groan. During the night, in fact I had a sneaking suspicion it was shortly after I went to sleep, someone had made me sleep walk down to the common room. I saw James giving me an odd look as he came down the stairs, straightening his tie. I then realized why I had a crick in my neck; it was because I was curled up in the smallest chair of the common room. (Luckily I was already in uniform and that involved pants, so I didn’t have to worry about showing anyone anything. Yes, I still wore pants, I didn’t enjoy the feeling of wearing a skirt and Headmistress Lovegood had given me permission to do so.)

I yawned and stretched and spotted John sitting on the couch, looking smug. I barely held back the glare. I knew he had done this to me and felt no remorse, and it pissed me off.

I stood up, shook myself out and stretched fully, and then I walked over to the stairway to the dorm room. I smacked my face into something and I fell back, utterly perplexed. I sat up and rubbed my nose, which had turned numb when I had hit whatever I had hit, and found James offering me a hand up.

“What was that?” James asked me, looking towards the stairway. I shrugged, “It looked like you walked into an invisible wall or something.”

I twisted around and glared at John. He just smiled at me innocently.

“Yes, Sis?” He asked me, as if unsure as to why I was glaring at him. I stood up and turned towards him in one smooth movement.

“You know why I’m so annoyed,” I growled, finally fed up, “take down whatever you set up. Now.”

He looked shocked. I had a feeling he never expected me to do such a thing as talk to him in that tone ever. I glared at him still.

“I’m leaving now,” I said, fed up with this. I waved my hand, causing my books to fly into my hands. I walked over to the doorway leading to the hall and found myself smashed against another invisible wall. I turned around whilst rubbing my nose and barely managed to stop myself from running at John and choking him.

“Would you kindly let me go?” I hissed. John was sitting in his chair comfortably. He looked like he didn’t plan on moving, and his smirk was starting to really get me annoyed.

“Sister, dear,” He said, leaning forward and resting his head on his hands, “I think it’s high time we had a little talk.”

I sighed, crossed the room, and sat down, “About what, John?”

“We must talk about your problem with having me around for so long.” He said. I sighed and James decided to help me out right then.

“John, she isn’t upset about hanging out with you,” He began, “she really isn’t. You’re just pushing this attachment thing too far is all. She needs her space, John, and you’re forcing her to coexist permanently with you, and it isn’t healthy for either of y-”

James slammed into a wall, having just been thrown there by John’s magic. I stood up at that and rushed over to him, to make sure he was all right.

“James, are you okay?” I asked him, leaning him on my shoulder. (By the way, we had woken up an hour early, so everyone was still abed at this hour. The only reason no one had been awakened by the noise, is because of the spell that glittered in the corners of the room. I saw it out of the corner of my eye; it was a spell of silence.)

James just sat there, coughing as he tried to regain his breath.

“I think I’m okay Lillian,” He told me, sitting up with a little help from me. He was still relying on my strength to hold him up, “and I’m fairly sure that you can let me go now. It wouldn’t do for my girlfriend to find me in the “arms of another woman”.”

I knew he was quoting a saying, but it made me smile to hear him refer to me as a woman. I pushed him away and let him help himself up.

I turned back to John, once we had figured out that he was fine.

“John how dare you?” I demanded. He just sat there, smiling.

“As I said before, Sister,” He said, not changing his position in the slightest, “I think you are taking this too far. You refuse to allow me to be with you for so long.”

I put up my hand to stop him from talking anymore, “John, that would be fine if you were just spending as much time with me as you could because you didn’t see me that much, but you see me every day. Insisting that we spend every second of every day just because you’re codependent is pure nonsense. Please let me have a little space.”

He just smiled. I let out a scream of annoyance.

“John!” I yelled at him, “Don’t you understand what you’re doing to us? You’re setting boundaries that aren’t needed and are, in fact bad for us in the long run. You’re making it so that we can never have a relationship of any kind with anyone other than each other, and that is cutting us off.”

“How is that a bad thing?” He asked me, “I still don’t understand.”

I almost screamed at him again but knew that would only make things worse, “John, what would happen if you wanted to go out with a girl, but couldn’t because you had to take me along?”

He looked thoughtful, “Oh, now I see what you mean.”

“Yes!” I exclaimed, thinking he had finally understood what I was saying, “Exactly! We need to be able to do things independently of each other.”

He gave me a disbelieving look, “No, that isn’t what you meant. You meant that we couldn’t do anything if we were together all of the time. I guess that means I’m just going to have to give up my love life before it even started.”

I let out a tired sigh and sat down, “Why are you doing this?”

I could feel his smile from across the room, “Because I want you all to myself, that’s why.”

I couldn’t help but say what I was thinking, “Man do you belong in Slytherin or what?”

James stiffened as did John. (By now, saying such a thing was construed as an insult.)

“Excuse me?” I could almost see the frost issuing from his mouth. I shrugged.

“You want to control me and Slytherin is known for that,” I said, acting nonchalant, “it’s a known fact, as is the fact that you weren’t forced to try on the Sorting Hat. You probably would’ve gone to Slytherin had that happened, you know.”

I looked into his eyes and saw all warmth disintegrate.

“You bitch,” John spat, standing up. I felt ropes wrap around me and begin to choke me. I coughed and James ran to my side, “how dare you insult me by saying such a thing. Slytherin was half the man that I am and you insult me by saying I should’ve been stuck in his house.”

He let out a laugh that had a manic twinge in it. I tore off the rope binding my wrists together and tore off the one around my neck. James pulled off the ropes entwining my legs and I stood with a stumble, leaning on James for support. John looked almost off the edge.

He started rambling on, clearly on a god-trip and I walked over to him and slapped him in the face. That stopped him.

“You need to grow up, you fool,” I told him, feeling like a mother when I said that, “you have no idea what power is, so don’t even try to say that you’re the strongest being in the world. Get off your high horse and take a deep breath of reality, Brother.”

He glared and slapped me back.

“Sister, you may be older than me, but you have no right to tell me that,” He said, and then he froze. He looked like he was listening to someone, and then it hit me. He was hearing one of the voices again. (I swear, if we were in the muggle world, he’d be taking medication for schizophrenia right about now.) I closed my eyes and tried to hear the voice, for the millionth time, but I heard nothing. (I always wished that I could hear them too, that way I could help John when he started hearing them; I never could.)

Just as I was about to give up hope, once again, I heard a whisper. It sounded like someone speaking over the phone from across the room. It sounded garbled, and then it slowly began to get clearer and louder. It was the voice of a man and he was talking directly to my brother.

“Calm down, John,” The voice said, “nothing will be gained from hurting her except her withdrawing from you. You need to give her the space she desires and hope she decides to come back to you.”

I almost smirked at that, until I remembered that I wasn’t supposed to be able to hear the voices. James looked at John in a confused manner, so I beckoned him over and explained things in a rather quiet manner. John finished before I did, and he grimaced at my lack of grace regarding the description of his issues.

He sighed loudly and waved his hand at the air around him, breaking the spell and causing it to disintegrate. He told me I could go, and so I did the only thing I should do.

“Thank you, John,” I said, grinning brilliantly, “I hope you don’t regret this decision.”

He muttered something that sounded suspiciously like, “So do I,” as I passed him.

James walked me to the Great Hall as I reveled in being away from my twin for the first time in weeks. I sat next to James and just about kissed Albus when he sat down, I was just that happy. (It also helped that John had not made an appearance yet.)

Once Lily, Rosie and Eliza had appeared and taken their seats near us, John made an entrance. By then, most of the school had arrived for breakfast, so all eyes fell on him. He ignored them and walked over to our spot, sitting only when I indicated he should.

“John, why don’t you just ask her out?” I asked him, when he continually looked at Josephine. He gave a startled jump and cleared his throat, his personality lighter compared to this morning.

“I don’t think she’d accept,” He said to me, looking down at his lap, “I’m a Gryffindor after all.”

I grinned, “And that’s another reason to want to be in Slytherin.”

He looked up at me, shocked, and then realized I was poking fun at him and grinned back at me.

“Seriously though,” I said, prodding him gently with my fork, “you should go over there and ask her out. I bet she’d agree.”

(In fact, I knew she’d agree, because that was one of the things I had seen when I had that fit in the common room last night.) John quickly ate the rest of his breakfast and stood up. I grabbed James’ arm when he tried to stand as well, since James thought John was going to leave, and we both watched as John walked over to the girl and asked her out.

“This’ll make him easier to bear, I hope,” I said to James, physically making him sit back down by yanking on his arm. He looked at me and I grinned, “it was one of the things that I saw when he put his hand on my forehead. Him and her are going to go out for a bit. It’s going to make him a little less cracked and it also means that he’ll latch onto someone else rather than me for once.”

“Isn’t that a bit cruel of you, not to warn her?” Lily asked, sounding so naïve. My grin grew mischievous.

“Oh, but then where would the fun be in that?” I asked, my expression changing to one of complete innocence. James just sighed in an exasperated manner and waited until Eliza finished before they walked off to class together.

I watched them leave the Great Hall with a twinge of regret.

“Sad to see him taken?” Albus asked me, with wicked humor. I gave him a thoughtful look.

“A little bit, I guess,” I admitted, to the astonishment of everyone. I grinned, “Don’t look so surprised. I enjoyed being flirted with, just like any other girl. With a girlfriend he can’t do that so I guess I’ll miss the banter more than the man himself.”

“Keep telling yourself that,” Rosie said groggily, without looking up from her book. I gave her a crooked smile.

“Oh I will, at least until he’s single again and I can take the mickey out of him without having to worry about girls getting the wrong idea.”

Albus looked at me, “Are you sure that’s all you want out of your relationship with my brother?”

I gave him the same smile I had given Rosie, “No. I’ll admit I wouldn’t mind more, but it ain’t going to happen if he’s taken. I’m much too honorable for that.”

Albus grinned triumphantly, “Good, because James was planning on breaking up with Eliza today.”

Everyone turned and stared at him. (Even Rosie looked up from her book.)

“It’s true,” Albus said, confirming it, “he told me that he was walking her to class that way he could talk with her about breaking up. He didn’t feel the same way about her, and he didn’t think she felt that strongly for him either. In any case, we haven’t heard any explosions yet so I guess she’s taking it well enough.”

I let out a laugh. Albus had gotten quite insightful regarding people over the past year and a half. Sometimes I wondered about his preferences, just like I did with James’, but thought it polite not to ask. (According to my way of thinking, a thoughtful guy has to be gay, although James is apparently the exception, so maybe his brother is as well.)

I stood up and headed for class; Albus followed me. I heard John telling the girl that he had always liked her, just as we walked into Potions. It was uneventful, except for the part where my potion managed to jump out of my cauldron and start trying to eat people. The teacher managed to tame it in time for class to end, thereby earning its name, “Seti”. (For those who are unaware of Egyptian mythology, Set or Seti was the god of chaos.)

I walked to my next class, memories of the previous class making my face burn from embarrassment, with Albus walking next to me. He finally got me to laugh about it and we ended up causing trouble in Transfiguration by laughing so hard that we turned the professor’s desk into a frog. (I’m not even sure how we managed that, since a frog is quite smaller than a desk, but in any case.)

We calmed down and fixed the desk, getting twenty points added and docked, (The teacher was proud that we had managed that, but was upset that we had used her desk for the experiment.)

John had earned ten points for Gryffindor when he turned his table into a butterfly. He turned it back by the end of class with a little help from me.

Transfiguration came easy to me, but apparently Potions didn’t. Neither was Charms, which required the use of a wand, which I hated using. (I knew that the wand I had been given wasn’t meant to be used in this manner and hated asking it to do such menial work. Especially since I didn’t even need one to do all of that, but my professor thought I was just being cheeky.)