Sequel: Nothing Is Ever Perfect ›
These Lives Of Ours.
I guess you can come in
“What are we going to do?” I stared up at the sky that seemed to be dumping buckets of water on us. “I don’t know Ryan.” Chip crossed her arms and glared at the sky as well. It wasn’t helping to improve either of our moods. “Can’t we just go back to Pete?” I shook my head as we started walking down the road. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. He’s trying to avoid prison, we shouldn’t make things worse.” Chip sighed and we turned to head back to my house. We were going to have to deal with things one way or another.
“I miss the guys.” I muttered, kicking at a random stone. “Me too. Why can’t we all just go live in a big house together? Wouldn’t that be nice?” I laughed, but stopped when I noticed she wasn’t smiling. “Come on, things will get better. I promise you. This can’t go on forever, besides, we’re 18 soon.” “Soon!! Soon! We’re not even 17 yet! Over a year is not soon.” “Yeah well…it’s the best we’ve got right now, now isn’t it?” I snapped. I couldn’t take being back in the situation.
“I’m sorry.” She muttered, not really sounding sorry. “Yeah whatever.” I shot back. If she was going to be a bitch I was going to bite right back. “Let’s just go home.” I sighed as we headed back towards the house. Luckily, dad was still gone so we’d at least have some time to form a plan. Well…that it…if we were going to be civil long enough to form a plan.
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I hate him. So much. I can’t believe he has the nerve to be angry with me! What did I ever do to make him hate me so much right now? I understand that we’re both frustrated but that’s no reason to start being a bastard.
“Thanks.” I mumbled as he held open the door for me. Always the polite one. Always perfect. “I’ll see you later.” I took the stairs two at a time, trying to beat Ryan to my room. I didn’t feel like talking to him. He needs a nap in my opinion.
“Come on Chip. Don’t do this!” I slammed the door in his face. “Ryan I don’t care.” He sighed and I heard him slide down the door. “I’m gonna sit here until you let me in.” I smiled and grabbed up my mp3 player. “Have fun then.” “Don’t worry, I will.” I plugged the earphones in and turned on one of the demos Panic! had made. It wasn’t the best song I’ve ever heard but it was still pretty good. Not only that; it reminded me of the time everything was perfect.
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I sighed and walked into my room, grabbing my guitar. If I was going to be stuck waiting for Chip I might as well get some good practice in right? “Is it still me that makes you sweat…?” I starting singing and strumming some of the chords for Lying. Even though Brendon was the official singer, it was easier to practice with the vocals. “Let’s get these teen hearts beating faster, faster.” I stopped when I heard Chip moving. I wondered if she was going to let me in.
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I paused my music and listened hard. I could faintly hear Ryan playing the guitar and singing. In fact, he was singing the song I had just been listening to. It was my favourite out of the ones they had recorded demo wise.
I got up and crept to the door. I wanted to hear better but I didn’t want him knowing I was listening. “Let’s get these teen hearts beating faster, faster.” I smiled at the familiar lyrics just as everything stopped. Damnit! He must have heard me. “Chip just let me in.” I sighed and pulled open the door. Sacrifices have to be made if I want more music.
“Took you long enough.” He flashed a trademark smile and I rolled my eyes. “Come on in then.” He grabbed his guitar and sat down on my bed. “If you’re going to be in here you’re going to be playing music.” He just nodded and started playing another Panic! song. I decided then that they were better acoustic.
“So where’s your mom?” I asked suddenly. Realizing we were hear completely alone. “I don’t know…” Ryan stopped playing at got up to look out the window. “Her cars gone. Let’s see if she left a note.” I followed him down the stairs and into the kitchen. Sure enough, sitting on the counter was a note.
“Ryan,
Your father and I are leaving for the weekend.”
“That’s it?” It seemed a bit odd to just get up and leave. “Yeah…dad must have stuck around a bit longer.” I sighed and looked up at the clock. It was 2 in the afternoon and I was starving. I hadn’t eaten…anything at all actually.
“Can we have some food?” I asked, already digging in the fridge for something edible. “Sure just help yourself.” I ignored his sarcasm and pulled out an apple. It seemed to be the only edible thing. “We’ll have to get some food.” I guess Ryan noticed that too. “With what money and what car?” “Well, I happen to have a learners permit and my parents always leave a bit of money for food. This isn’t the first time they’ve left me alone.” Oh that’s nice. They just abandon their only child. “Well then let’s go.”
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I have to admit I was a bit uneasy being in the car with Ryan. He’d only had a few driving lessons from Pete, he was in no way fit to be driving us around by himself. “Are you sure this is safe?” I asked, peering behind us, making sure there were no cars. “Chip, would I put you in a car with me driving if I thought it wasn’t safe?” I thought about it for a moment. “After this morning, you might.” He laughed and turned on the radio. “Don’t get smart little missy.” My turn to laugh. This morning’s arguments and abuse had been thrown out the window.
“I miss the guys.” I muttered, kicking at a random stone. “Me too. Why can’t we all just go live in a big house together? Wouldn’t that be nice?” I laughed, but stopped when I noticed she wasn’t smiling. “Come on, things will get better. I promise you. This can’t go on forever, besides, we’re 18 soon.” “Soon!! Soon! We’re not even 17 yet! Over a year is not soon.” “Yeah well…it’s the best we’ve got right now, now isn’t it?” I snapped. I couldn’t take being back in the situation.
“I’m sorry.” She muttered, not really sounding sorry. “Yeah whatever.” I shot back. If she was going to be a bitch I was going to bite right back. “Let’s just go home.” I sighed as we headed back towards the house. Luckily, dad was still gone so we’d at least have some time to form a plan. Well…that it…if we were going to be civil long enough to form a plan.
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I hate him. So much. I can’t believe he has the nerve to be angry with me! What did I ever do to make him hate me so much right now? I understand that we’re both frustrated but that’s no reason to start being a bastard.
“Thanks.” I mumbled as he held open the door for me. Always the polite one. Always perfect. “I’ll see you later.” I took the stairs two at a time, trying to beat Ryan to my room. I didn’t feel like talking to him. He needs a nap in my opinion.
“Come on Chip. Don’t do this!” I slammed the door in his face. “Ryan I don’t care.” He sighed and I heard him slide down the door. “I’m gonna sit here until you let me in.” I smiled and grabbed up my mp3 player. “Have fun then.” “Don’t worry, I will.” I plugged the earphones in and turned on one of the demos Panic! had made. It wasn’t the best song I’ve ever heard but it was still pretty good. Not only that; it reminded me of the time everything was perfect.
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I sighed and walked into my room, grabbing my guitar. If I was going to be stuck waiting for Chip I might as well get some good practice in right? “Is it still me that makes you sweat…?” I starting singing and strumming some of the chords for Lying. Even though Brendon was the official singer, it was easier to practice with the vocals. “Let’s get these teen hearts beating faster, faster.” I stopped when I heard Chip moving. I wondered if she was going to let me in.
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I paused my music and listened hard. I could faintly hear Ryan playing the guitar and singing. In fact, he was singing the song I had just been listening to. It was my favourite out of the ones they had recorded demo wise.
I got up and crept to the door. I wanted to hear better but I didn’t want him knowing I was listening. “Let’s get these teen hearts beating faster, faster.” I smiled at the familiar lyrics just as everything stopped. Damnit! He must have heard me. “Chip just let me in.” I sighed and pulled open the door. Sacrifices have to be made if I want more music.
“Took you long enough.” He flashed a trademark smile and I rolled my eyes. “Come on in then.” He grabbed his guitar and sat down on my bed. “If you’re going to be in here you’re going to be playing music.” He just nodded and started playing another Panic! song. I decided then that they were better acoustic.
“So where’s your mom?” I asked suddenly. Realizing we were hear completely alone. “I don’t know…” Ryan stopped playing at got up to look out the window. “Her cars gone. Let’s see if she left a note.” I followed him down the stairs and into the kitchen. Sure enough, sitting on the counter was a note.
“Ryan,
Your father and I are leaving for the weekend.”
“That’s it?” It seemed a bit odd to just get up and leave. “Yeah…dad must have stuck around a bit longer.” I sighed and looked up at the clock. It was 2 in the afternoon and I was starving. I hadn’t eaten…anything at all actually.
“Can we have some food?” I asked, already digging in the fridge for something edible. “Sure just help yourself.” I ignored his sarcasm and pulled out an apple. It seemed to be the only edible thing. “We’ll have to get some food.” I guess Ryan noticed that too. “With what money and what car?” “Well, I happen to have a learners permit and my parents always leave a bit of money for food. This isn’t the first time they’ve left me alone.” Oh that’s nice. They just abandon their only child. “Well then let’s go.”
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I have to admit I was a bit uneasy being in the car with Ryan. He’d only had a few driving lessons from Pete, he was in no way fit to be driving us around by himself. “Are you sure this is safe?” I asked, peering behind us, making sure there were no cars. “Chip, would I put you in a car with me driving if I thought it wasn’t safe?” I thought about it for a moment. “After this morning, you might.” He laughed and turned on the radio. “Don’t get smart little missy.” My turn to laugh. This morning’s arguments and abuse had been thrown out the window.