That Four Letter Word

After dinner I excused myself and went to my room to start homework. Jenny was going back to her room to get ready for bed and Derington was going to his room to prepare for school tomorrow.
I gathered a few of my books from my bag and dropped them on the sheep skin rug in my study. I didn't feel like sitting at a desk tonight and the rung looked warm with all the pillows around it. So I sat down and dug into Chemistry first, the hardest class.
A couple hours later I glanced at my cell phone, which read 10:05pm, and I had two unread text messages.

Jasper: I have some news. Bad news. Text me when you can.
Jordan: We need to talk, K. I miss you. I'm so sorry for the things I said at the beach and I'd like to get together so I can formally apologize for acting like an ass. Oh, and there's some bad news too. Love, Jasper.

I texted Jasper back first because there was nothing scarier than not knowing bad news. I hated bad news, well who didn't, but something felt wrong already.

Keira: Hey Jasp, what's going on?
Keira: I accept your apology, Jordan, thank you. I'd love to meet you after school tomorrow. Jasper also texted me about bad news, but he didn't say. I hope every thing's okay.

I waited for the replies while I put my school stuff away and listened to my ipod. My heart was starting to speed up as I worried about what the bad news could be. Really, it could be anything, but does it have to deal with me? Or is it about my parents? Or school? Is Jasper moving? Suddenly my cell phone beeped.

Jordan: After school sounds good. Did Jasper tell you yet?
Keira: Okay. No, he didn't. What's going on?
Jordan: Can I tell you tomorrow after school? I'd rather tell you in person.

I bit my lip and thought about this. He wanted to wait a whole day before telling me, so it must be bad...

Keira: If you must.
Jordan: I think it's better that way. Every thing's going to be okay.
Keira: Crap, Jordan, you're really scaring me.
Jordan: If I tell you now you have to promise not to do anything stupid.

I frowned when I read the message. What would I do and why would I do something stupid?

Keira: I won't...
Jordan: Promise?
Keira: Oh my god, tell me!
Jordan: Dillon's back.

My heart skipped a beat but before I could reply I got another message.

Jasper: Dillon's in Boston. For good.

I dropped the phone and layed down on the rug, but I didn't even feel how soft the sheep fur was. I didn't feel anything but the numbness of my body.

*Follow me*
I shook my head, trying to make the tears stop.
*I don't want to invade their rooms, Dillon*
My hands shook as I grabbed the fur, clenching it tightly.
*It's fine, it's a party...sit down*
With short, quick breaths I swallowed the lump in my throat.
*What are you doing? You've had too much to drink, Dillon*
One by one the tears fell down my burning cheek.
*I love you, Keira, I love you*

As the morning sun escaped through the curtains a chill ran through my spine. The room was half lit with the orange glow of the light that I didn't bother turning off last night, and half lit by the rays of sunlight. The maid came in and adjusted the curtains, telling me to get up.
I layed on my bed as if I couldn't hear her. My ears only heard a light hum that ran through my body, preventing me from moving.
"Keira, it's time to get ready for school. You don't want to be late." She swiped the sheets from underneath me and took off the covers.
I stood up, reaching for the floor with my bare feet, feeling the cold wood touch my toes. I walked to the bathroom to get ready for school.

When I walked outside I was unaware of anything around me. All I saw was the ground below me feet and the door that led to the garage. I wanted nothing more to become invisible. Actually, I wanted nothing more than to leave Boston. Maybe I should move to California. It'd be less crowded.
Derington was in the garage looking at the antique models my father collected. "Hey," he said as he saw me come in.
I nodded at him and walked over to my own car. As I turned the keys to start the car I realized it was Friday and smiled. This weekend I'll drive somewhere to get away. I'll drive to New York, ya. That way I'll be there extra early for the dinner party Saturday.
I got to school right on time and rushed in to my first class, which was Chemistry. My seat was in the back row so it was easy to not concentrate and just zone out. That's exactly what
I did; I got out my notebook and started to draw.
Suddenly something hit my chair. It was Jordan, who sat in front of me, tapping the front of my desk. The teacher was writing notes on the board so she was too busy to notice him turned around. I kept my head down as long as I could until he tilted my chin up with his hand.
"What are you drawing?"
I showed him my notebook. I was drawing a person on top of a tree that was dead with no leaves. She was hanging on one of the branches, wearing jeans and a black t-shirt. I haven't drawn the field yet or the rain.
"Very emo."
I shrugged. My head snapped down again and I continued to draw. He didn't say anything else and neither did I.