That Four Letter Word

I paced back and forth in the foyer, waiting for the doorbell to ring. A couple hours ago I had to explain to my mother why I was back in Boston and not in New York. Now, I have to explain to Jordan why I'm not a freak. I'd much rather talk to my mother instead.
The doorbell rang.
I brushed my jeans, even though there was nothing to brush off, and opened the heavy door. Jordan stood there, jeans and a t-shirt, looking like a model for Ralph Lauren. He pushed back his wavy hair and let out a breath of air. "Hi."
I half smiled and he pulled me into a hug. His body was like a giant stuffed teddy bear and if I were into hugs I would appreciate the comfort more, but, like always, I let go of him too soon and the smile on his face disappeared. "Let's go to my room."
He followed me back up the stairs and all the way to my room, where I had planned that he'd help me pick out and outfit for tonight. He was going as well because his mother helped plan the benifit.
"I think you should wear something blue," his lips turned at the corners as he sat down on my white couch. "And fitting."
I smiled back and rolled my eyes. "Of course." I walked into my closet and looked at the few dozen dressed hung on the black racks. Then I picked a blue strapless mini and walked out. "What about this?"
He looked up from the magazine, "That's pretty."
I looked back at the dress and frowned. "I don't think so." Putting it back I grabbed another one that I forgot I had. It was perfect! I've never worn it before, but it was new and Prada and you couldn't go wrong with the style. Form fitting at the torso and it flowed out like a river down to my knees, leaving it not too formal, yet absolutly gorgeous. Plus, the color matched my eyes perfectly and went with my pale skin and dark hair. "I think I found something!"
"Good," he sounded disinterested. "Try it on for me."
I walked back in the closet to try it on.
"Oh, Keira," he called.
"Ya?"
"Why do you circle some of these pictures?"
I dropped the dress. "What pictures?" my voice was a little shaky so I cleared my throat.
"In the magazines, you have these models circeled."
I picked up the dress with shaky hands. "Oh, that's just the things I want to buy. You know, so I don't forget to get them."
"But you'd circle the cloths then. In here you circled their arms and legs, not the cloths."
I slipped the dress on and took a breath in. "I...circeled the models that wear the cloths I like."
"Oh." He sounded convinced.
I walked out, letting out a breath of air. "How do I look?"
"Whoa..." Derington was sitting on the couch by Jordan, his mouth hanging open in awe.
My cheeks blushed and looked at Jordan, who was confused again. "You look amazing." He looked back at Derington who was still staring at me, and then put he magazine down.
"Hey Derington," I said suprisingly.
"I didn't mean to intrude, I just saw the door opened and walked in. I'm sorry." He was still staring in awe, but his mouth was closed now.
"That's okay. Have you met Jordan?"
"We just met, ya."
Jordan didn't look pleased with the way Derington was looking at me, so I tried to change the subject. "You're going tonight?"
"Yup, and Jenny too."
"Cool. It should be fun, then."
Jordan was still silent, but luckily my phone rang to break the awkward chat. I rushed to my bed and grabbed the phone without looking at who it was.
"Hello?"
"Keira? This is Dillion. Don't hang up, please, I got this number from your mom."
My face probably showed who it was because before I knew it Jordan was by my side. "Give me the phone," he snapped his hand out.
I panicked. I wasn't sure what to do. If I gave the phone to Jordan...Dillion wouldn't call again. "What do you want?" I asked.
He sounded relieved that I was talking. "I'm going to the benifit tonight in New York. Your mom said you're going too."
My heart raced.
"What did he say?" Jordan demanded.
I ignored him and bit my lip. "Ya."
"Well, I was hoping...maybe...I don't know...we could talk. I didn't really get the chance I wanted yesterday and I was hoping you had some time to think."
Think...I've been thinking for a year now and I still don't have a concrete thought about all of this. "Ok."
He was silent for a moment and then, "ok...I'll see you tonight?"
"Goodbye." I hung up sat down on the bed.
Derington was now sporting a very confused face as he got up from the couch and walked over.
"What did he say?" Jordan was growing more and more impatient.
I swallowed, giving me a second to think, and then looked at Jordan. "He said he hopes that I can think about forgiving him, and talk to him when I have thought about it."
Jordan looked at me with cross eyebrows, "Ok..."
I didn't want to tell him about tonight. If I did he would never let me go. Part of me was shaking with fear about meeting Dillion, and yet part of me still had butterflies at the very thought of seeing him again.