Marked with Silence

“Oh come on Mom, you know that nothing is going to happen!”

“Pft, yeah right. I’m not blind Jerome. Sapphira is…” she paused to think of the right words, “probably the hottest girl you have ever dated.”

“Mom!”

“And I know what you two will be up to if you sleep over. Especially if you’ll be there for a week, and especially with her aunt and uncle out of town. First, you’ll move from the couch to the bed and you’ll just get closer and then—“

“Ew. Stop. Please, for the sake of my sanity please do not say whatever you were gonna say next.”

We had been having this conversation in our living room for the past fifteen minutes. This was the third time that she looped the conversation back to sex.

Of course, the topic had crossed my mind. I mean, how could it not have? But as comfortable as Sapphira and I were, in the physical regard, we hadn’t even really talked about having sex.

“I’m just not comfortable with it,” my mom said as she crossed her arms and leaned back into the sofa.

“So Mr. and Mrs. Chadney have to miss sunny Florida and catching up with old friends because you’re out of your comfort zone?”

My mom didn’t say anything else, so I continued the guilt trip, “And Sapphira is going to feel terrible for being the reason they can’t go. It’s bad enough that she knows she can’t be left alone for a week like a normal teenager, but you’re gonna make her feel bad for holding her aunt and uncle back? Come on.”

She gave me a hard look. “Really low, Jerome.”

I grinned, “Did it work?”

She got up and started walking in the foyer. I turned around and followed her with my eyes.

“You better be sleeping on the couch.”

“Thank you, thank you, thank you!”

“And no mentioning this to your father.”

I grinned and immediately dug out my cell phone from my jean pocket to call Sapphira.


I went down the list in my head, ‘Boxers? Check. Toothpaste? Check. Cell phone charger? Check.’

I zipped the duffel bag closed and felt a sense of satisfaction. Then I heard the sound of my phone vibrating against the wood of my bed stand.

“Hey, baby. What’s up?”

“Nothing. Just wondering if you were on your way.”

“Yeah, I just finished getting packed.”

There was a two second silence. “I’m really excited,” she confessed.

I smiled, “So am I.”

“So I called to ask you a favor.”

I paused and took a seat on my bed. “You sound really apprehensive about it.”

“It’s because I am.”

I waited for her to tell me what the favor was.

“Could you stop by the store and get me a box of tampons? I’m really embarrassed to ask, but the nearest store is a ten minute walk and…in my current state that’s too long of a period to walk . No pun intended,” she added quickly.

I wasn’t sure if I had ever heard her say so many words in such a short period of time when it wasn’t in regard to an emotional matter.

I pictured myself walking into a CVS and staring at the side of the aisle labeled “Feminine Products.” I shuddered.

“Um, okay,” I agreed anyway. “What kind?”

If anything, I knew that women always had a preference. I had seen my mom by the exact same pads every time we were at the grocery store ever since I could remember. But my question only added to the awkwardness.

“Tampax Pearl. Regular size. There will be a part of the box that’s yellow.”

I thought that she might have been too embarrassed to ask for a size larger.

“Okay. We’ll be there soon.”

“I really appreciate this. Thank you.”

“It’s no problem. I’ll see you in no time.”

“Bye.”

As I ended the call and slung the duffel bag over my shoulder, I couldn’t help but think that the news would elate my mom. At least she knew that we weren’t going to have sex—for about five days at least.


The first thing I did when I saw Sapphira was extending the hand that was holding her tampons in a plastic bag.

She blushed and gingerly took it from my hands. Quickly, she reached up to peck my cheek in thanks, and then scurried to the bathroom.

I closed the apartment door behind me and took a seat on the couch, resting my duffel bag at my feet.

A couple of minutes later I heard the door open again and felt her sit down next to me.

Sapphira slipped her arm around my waist, so I put my arm around her shoulder in response.

“I got some really odd looks when I was buying that.”

She scooted closer to me, “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. But it was kind of funny since the guy that rung me up was this like, a really butch guy that had a goatee and a tattoo on his neck. And he wasn’t the one that looked at me weirdly. Instead, he asked me if I knew that there was a coupon for them and then gave me the discount.”

She chuckled, “That’s funny.”

“So what do you want to do tonight?”

“Since neither of us can drive, I don’t see too many options.”

“We could walk.”

She gave me a pointed look.

“Oh, right. Not a good time. I could teach you to drive.”

“That’s illegal,” she replied quickly.

“Or I could drive.”

“That’s illegal too.”

“Or we could take the metro.”

“I’ll get my coat.”


The fare to get out of town was a bit pricey, so we settled for the local IHOP. As we were being seated I noticed a group of our classmates in a corner booth, but I didn’t think Sapphira saw them.

The waitress took us to a small table in the middle of the room, took our drink orders, and left after giving us the menus.

“What are you in the mood for?”

“Hmm,” she responded as she flipped between two parts of the menu. “Either chocolate chip pancakes, or soup.”

I laughed, “Those are totally different things to crave.”

She bit her lip, trying to make a decision. “I think I’m going to get soup.”

A few minutes later the waitress came back with our drinks and took our order.

“So what are we doing for Christmas?” she asked me after the waitress left.

“Oh, right. That’s in...” I quickly subtracted the date from twenty-five. “four days,” I finished. “And then I go back to my house on the twenty-ninth when your aunt and uncle come home.” I stated the last part just to be sure that I kept my dates in check. “My mom isn’t holding a party, mainly since she doesn’t really have anyone to invite. But she’ll probably still want to see me.”

Sapphira nodded, “Okay. Can I come too?”

“Yeah, of course. I’ll let her know that we’ll drop by for dinner.”

“Anything for Christmas Eve?”

“No, why?”

“I want to take you somewhere.”

“Where?” I immediately asked.

She looked up, her eyes looking mischievous.

“It’s a surprise, isn’t it?”

Sapphira nodded.

Our food came; soup for her, and blueberry pancakes for me. I offered her a bite, but she shook her head. I guessed she had made the right decision.

Laughter erupted from behind me, and I turned to see my classmates in a fit, their eyes veering away when they saw me looking at them.

Unfortunately, Sapphira was faced towards the booth they were in. “They’re making fun of us.”

I shook my head. “I’m sure they’re not,” I lied.

She shrugged, and looked down at her bowl of soup.

After that, it was like both of us ate faster, took more bites , and had less sips. And as soon as we were both satisfied I couldn’t get my wallet out fast enough.

As we took the bus back to the apartment, my mind couldn’t help but think as to what they could have been joking about Sapphira and I to elicit such a response. I tried to come up with the reason why they laughed so hard.

My inferiority complex started to set in. They must have been laughing because they were cracking jokes as to why Sapphira had chosen me, of all people, to be with. Just like the rumors that were going around when she and I first started dating. They probably still thought that she was just using me for sexual favors, all though in reality I’m pretty sure Sapphira would have been able to get that from most guys in our school. They must have been just going on about that.

Because honestly, they couldn’t have been laughing about anything that really had to do with her. They had to have been making fun of my skinny legs or the clothes that I wore. They had to have been making fun of the new kid and how he was a military brat. Because honestly, they couldn’t have been cracking jokes about a girl with a dead family.