My Heart Is The Worst Kind Of Weapon

The next morning I woke up, groggy, to the sound of my cellphone buzzing. I turned my head and saw it vibrating on my nighttable.

I stretched out my arm and pulled the cellphone towards me, glancing at the screen as I did so to see who was calling.

Dylan.

His name flashing on my screen sent a chill through my body that made me leap out of bed, phone in hand. I was in the small hallway of my room when I flipped the phone open, my heart pounding, and raised it to my ear.

“Hello?” I said quietly.

“Lindsey.” I heard Dylan's voice on the other end of the line. He sounded haggard and upset, “Baby, it's so good to hear your voice.”

“Yeah, you too. Why're you calling?” I asked, worried something terrible had happened.

“I just miss you so much.” He breathed loudly, “I haven't talked to you in a long time. I'm going crazy over here. I needed to hear your voice.”

“Okay.” I brushed my hair down with my free hand, biting my lip.

“You- how are you?” Dylan asked. He still sounded really upset and I frowned.

“Dylan are you okay?” I asked him, “You don't sound so good.”

“I love you.” He said quickly, “And I need to hear that you love me too. Okay, please Lindsey? It's been too long and- and I need to hear you say it.”

“I love you, Dylan Medle.” I said, but for some reason, my heart didn't start beating faster like it normally did when I told Dylan how I felt about him. Probably because I was tired.

I heard Dylan heave a sigh of relief, “I can't wait until you're home and we can just get-”

“Married.” I finished for him, “Yeah, I can't wait til we get married either.”

But I had to almost force excitement into my voice as I said this. I must have been really tired.

“I can't wait to see you again.” Dylan was saying, “Only one month and a bit left.”

There was sharp, rapping knock on my door and I switched my phone to my other ear, “Hey, Dylan, I'm sorry but I gotta run. Someone's at my door.”

“Okay. And Lindsey-” Dylan took a breath, “I'm sorry for calling you when you said not too. I know how busy you are, but I was just missing you so much and I- I was worried you'd come back and not want to get married.”

“That will never happen.” I told Dylan, as the knocking sounded again, “I gotta go, see you soon. Love you.”

I hung up and walked to my door, pulling it open. Jamia stood on the other end, a look on her face that I had never seen before. It was a cross between surprise and fury.

“I can't believe you.” She spat, walking into my room without permission, letting the door shut behind her, “You are un-fucking-believable.”

“What are you talking about?” I asked, perplexed.

“Oh, I'll tell you what I'm talking about.” She sneered, “How about, 'I can't wait til we get married' and, 'I love you, Dylan Medle'. Who the hell is Dylan Medle?”

I gaped at her, my mind whirling as I realized that she had overheard my end of the conversation on the phone. This was it. My carefully kept secret was now unveiled, and Jamia was the one holding all the power.

“What were you doing outside my door?” I cried, as fear of what she would do now that she knew my secret coursed through my body.

“I came to say goodbye!” Jamia snapped, “But I got a lot more than I bargained for when I heard you tell some Dylan person that you loved him. What the hell is wrong with you? What about Frank?”

I felt my eyes fill with tears as Jamia continued, rampaging around my hotel room.

“You've been acting like a complete bitch toward me. Giving me hell because of the fact that I cheated on Frank. When you're over hear doing the exact same thing! No, actually, what you're doing is worse. You're getting married to someone and you're also in a relationship with Frank? Are you serious?”

“How did this even happen?” She screeched, “How could Frank and this Dylan not know about each other? What the hell is wrong with you? You're screwing with two people's emotions, and you know one of them is going to have to get hurt in the end. So what are you going to do? Tell Frank the truth about your hidden marriage and break his heart again?”

The tears were now silently running down my cheeks as Jamia stopped to catch her breath. She had basically summed up all of my thoughts about this whole situation in one, horrific rant, and now I had to explain myself. But how? How did you explain the fact that you were a liar, and a disgrace to this world?