Cracker Jack

I greeted Jack with a smile as he joined me at my locker after school. I closed the grey-painted metal door and snapped my lock into place.

"You look happy," he commented.

I nodded. "I am."

"Why? Did something happen in math class?"

"No," I smirked. "Something happened just now. You came to rescue me from here. Let's go home."

Jack wrapped his scarf around his neck and smiled at me. "Shall we?"

I tucked a textbook into my shoulder bag and nodded. Jack took my hand and headed off down the hallway. Occasionally, the two of us still received looks of envy or, more likely, hatred. It was a lot more bearable when Jack was with me.

I had recently come to terms with the fact that Jack was going to stay close to me, no matter what. Instead of hoping and fearing that something would break us apart, I began to look forward to our time together. I wasn't focused on the inevitable end. I only cared about what was happening right then. Jack seemed to notice the change in me. He smiled more and more each day. I could sense his relaxation.

The Mercer household was different now. It felt empty without Angel and Bobby there. There was no arguing or bickering; there were no lighthearted yet mildly taunting jokes at the dinner table. There was just Jack and Evelyn. Jerry visited a lot, but he couldn't be there all the time. He had his own life to worry about.

For a change, Jack came over to my house that evening. My mother was hypnotized by the television, and she failed to notice that I wasn't alone when I came home.

"You're early," she noted, refusing to peel her eyes away from the screen.

"Yeah," I agreed. "I didn't go over to Jack's place today."

"Has Evelyn finally had enough of you?"

"Who knows?" I winked at Jack before I lead him up the stairs and to my bedroom. I even liked my own home more when Jack was with me. He was optimistic almost to a fault; he chose to see the fact that I could smoke in my bedroom instead of the fact that I went without any extravagances. He was probably only so positive because of me. He had to balance out my eternal pessimism.

"What are we studying today?" Jack asked, dropping his backpack onto my floor.

I flipped on my radio. "Music?"

Jack stretched out across my bed, chuckling lightly. "That works for me. I'm getting really sick of trigenometry."

I opened my closet and pulled a bag of potato chips from the top shelf. I had stolen them from a cupboard downstairs after Mom had gone grocery shopping one day. It was kind of an emergency stash in case she decided one day that we no longer needed to eat. I tossed the chips to Jack, who caught them and gave me a confused look.

"I thought that I was the only one that hid food."

I shrugged. "You're not the only one that isn't certain about the future."

He wrenched open the bag and set it beside him on the bed. He sat up and made room for me. I hopped onto the mattress beside him and popped a chip into my mouth. Jack was watching me intently. Feeling suddenly nervous, I reached up and lightly felt the skin around my lips.

"Is there something on my face?"

He shook his head. "No, there isn't."

"Then what are you staring at?"

"I'm just thinking. Where do you think we'll be in ten years, Hayley?"

I paused, wondering if I was walking into a trap. Jack's question was innocent enough, but I was almost certain that there was a hidden meaning. I cleared my throat. "I don't know, Jack. Hopefully both of us will still be alive. And maybe we can avoid prison."

He nodded, then his eyes finally drifted from my face. There was still a small, content grin on his face. I lay back across the width of the bed, resting my feet on the floor and staring up at the off-white ceiling. Jack did the same.

It was quiet for a moment. Finally, I decided to answer the real question that he had asked. "I can't really say for sure. I'd like to say that we'll get out of here and we'll have some fairy tale ending, but that doesn't really seem to be our style. I hope you'll still be in my life, at the very least." I didn't mention that hoping was one thing, but acting on it was another.

Jack didn't notice my hesitation. "I hope the same thing. Maybe we'll be some of the lucky ones."

"Yeah, maybe."

Jack bit into a chip, and crumbs littered his cheek. I smiled and swiped them away. He gave me a goofy grin and ate the remains of his chip. We stared at each other for a long moment. I knew that there had been only truth to what I'd said before. If both of us were alive and not in prison, then I could only hope that he would be in my life a few years down the road.

I reached up and pushed his hair back off of his forehead. "That's better," I murmured.

"Is that a hint? Should I be scheduling a hair appointment?"

My smile brightened. "No. I like your hair. I just felt like looking at your pretty face."

He laughed and swatted my hand away. "Quit it. We both know that you're the looker here."

"I feel like you're buttering me up for something. Flattery will get you nowhere. Bribery, on the other hand," I tilted my head and gazed off into space, as if I was imagining all the riches I could receive if Jack decided to bribe me.

He shoved a potato chip into my mouth. "There. Consider yourself bribed. Although, I'm not really sure what I'm bribing you for."

I swallowed a jagged piece of the chip and coughed loudly. After a moment, I gathered myself. "Sorry. Went down the wrong tube."

"Hayley!" My mother yelled up the stairs. "Drink some water! I can't hear the TV over your hacking!"

Jack's eyebrows pulled together. "You weren't kidding about her, were you?"

"I lie to a lot of people, Jack, but I've never lied to you."

"I'm kind of glad that she doesn't know I'm here. She would never say that stuff if she knew someone else was listening, would she?"

I shook my head. "No."

I could see the protective side of Jack emerging. It was kind of strange to witness. He'd spent his entire life being pushed around and abused, and the only way he'd dealt with it was to construct a hard-walled shell. In that sense, he was so much like me that it was frightening. It was easier to shut people out than to let them in. But now that we had broken down one another's defenses, we found the need to extend our boundaries around one another. I wanted to save him from anything harmful, and he wanted to do the same thing for me. But what good would it do to have us transform ourselves from self-sustaining hermits into martyrs?

"She's not that bad," I murmured. "I'm used to it."

"You don't need to explain," he said. "Of all people, I think I might best understand you right now. Broken homes aren't easy. You bite your tongue and you get by."

"Now you know why we usually go to your place after school."

"I always knew. I figured that it must have been hard here if you were willing to go from no supervision to constant supervision."

I shrugged. "It kind of... this is probably going to sound nuts, but it kind of feels nice to have rules. When she takes the time to check in on us, it doesn't feel intrusive. It feels like she cares. I mean, it beats getting yelled at because you're choking too loudly." I had meant for the last statement to be a joke, but it came out sounding bitter and angry.

Jack stood up suddenly. Confused, I followed suit. He seemed outraged. Furious was probably a more appropriate word. For the first time, he seemed kind of scary. He towered over me.

"Jack," I whispered. "Calm down."

"It's not okay, Hayley," he said. I could tell that he was torn. On one hand, he wanted to go and yell at my mother, or something equally stupid. On the other hand, he didn't want to scare me.

I reached out and touched his arm carefully. "I know. But you've survived worse. And I've survived worse. And in two years, you're going to take me away. Remember?"

He looked at me then. The harsh look in his eyes dissipated. "Can you last that long?"

"I can if you can," I told him. It seemed to be working. His tense muscles were slowly relaxing. "As long as I've got you, and you're willing to take me in when it gets too hard, then I can survive."

Jack hesitated. I knew that it was hard for him to turn his back on an issue that hit so close to home. "She knows that she wrecked her chance with both of her kids, right?" He asked finally.

"Yeah, she does. I've told her the same thing myself. She kind of tried to make it up to me. She made an effort, at least. But I didn't really stick around and play nice. Instead I went down the street for Christmas Eve, and this really great guy kissed me for the first time. After that, I didn't really care enough to listen to what she had to say."

His smile slowly returned, and I felt like I had broken through. He was my leverage here. I had already chosen him over my family, but he hadn't known that. Now that he did, it seemed that we had reached a turning point.

"I still swear that I'll get you out of here."

I nodded. "I know. And until then, we'll carry on and get through one day at a time."

Jack leaned down and kissed me swiftly. I leaned up and stretched onto my toes so that he didn't have to hunch over so far. It was an odd sensation; I was standing in my bedroom, in the house that had brought on so much pain and suffering, but I felt safe.

When we broke apart, Jack grinned at me. "Tomorrow, we go back to hanging out at my place."

"Deal."

It seemed to me that things were suddenly reversed. He was usually talking me out of doing something reckless. I didn't know what to think about the fact that I had to talk him down. For a moment, he had seemed downright dangerous.

Maybe he really was a Mercer, after all.