If I Only Had the Heart

It was after midnight when Kylie and Jordan finally decided they should head out. “We should find one of the guys and let them knew we’re leaving,” Kylie told her cousin who nodded in agreement, but added, “No, we should find Matt.”

Kylie laughed but agreed.

Luckily for the two girls, Matt and the guys happened to be all together. They were all in the back lounge when the girls found them. “Matt!” Kylie called out, getting his attention.

His head turned and he saw her standing in the doorway of the lounge. He knew this was it; Kylie was leaving. “Hey,” he said when she sat next to him. “You guys leaving?”

She nodded. “’Fraid so. It’s kind of a long drive back.”

“Yeah, and Kylie’s a little bitch and doesn’t want to live on the edge for one day,” Jordan added sarcastically.

The blonde laughed. “Oh shut up, Jordan. We are not sleeping in the car so we can stay longer.”

Matt laughed. “Sorry Jord, but I have to agree. Sleeping in the car is not smart. It’s a good idea to go back.”

Kylie looked at Matt for a few minutes. “Hey, can I talk to you for a minute?” she asked. When he nodded, the two stood and walked out of the lounge.

After a few minutes, everyone in the lounge jumped up and ran to the windows, trying to spy on the ex-couple. “Jack, get down!” Jordan hissed, pulling him down to the ground so no one could see them from the outside. “We do not want to get caught!”

Outside, Kylie and Matt were standing in the very light mist that had happened once the rain had finally subsided. “So, what's up?” Matt asked her as he stuck his hands in his back pockets.

“I just wanted to say bye without everyone standing around, even though they’re spying on us right now,” she smirked, gesturing to the window. Matt turned and looked and sure enough, caught several pairs of eyes staring at him. He laughed and she shook her head. “They’re so immature.”

“Yeah, but those are our friends for you.” He looked at her again; really looked at her. “So this is it?”

She shrugged. “I hope not. I mean, I want to be friends Matt. I don’t want to just fall off the face of the earth that is your life. You know?”

He nodded. “I know.”

“So here’s what we’re going to do,” she told him as she stuck her hand out. “Hand over your phone.” He did as he was told. She pressed a few buttons and then handed the phone back. “I entered my Skype name in my contact info. I’m on a lot in the studio because it gets boring, so if you see me online, talk to me please. Okay?”

Matt nodded. “Alright,” he told her with a smile. Then he leaned in for a hug. She reciprocated because she wanted to and everything about the hug felt natural. That was when she felt she had to pull away.

“We’re going to make this friends thing work, right?”

Matt didn’t say what he wanted to say, but instead smiled and nodded. “Of course we will. Or at least we’re going to try.”

Kylie smiled. “We should probably head back on the bus.”

Matt agreed and they went in. Then, the goodbyes commenced. Hugs were exchanged and laughs were shared, but then it was time for Kylie and Jordan to head on their way. Matt and Alex saw them out, of course. When they reached Kylie’s car, a few more hugs were exchanged. Alex, as he was hugging Kylie, whispered to her, “Be careful. Matt means well but I don’t want anything bad to happen,” which confused Kylie. She wanted to ask him about it but he pulled away before she could. He winked to reassure her everything was fine, that he was just saying and she nodded.

Kylie hugged Matt one last time and said, “Remember, no losing contact,” to which he laughed.

“Promise,” he told her.

Then, with one final wave as the girls were in the car, they were gone.

Once the car was out of sight, Alex turned to Matt and said, “Bro, don’t make any mistakes ok? Don’t hurt her again. I don’t know what’s going on with you guys and frankly I don’t want to know. Just… don’t fuck things up.”

Matt shook his head. “Stay out of it if you don’t want to know, Alex. Just stay out of it.” And then, with that, Matt walked away.

When he reached the bus, Matt pulled his phone out and dialed a number. He hit send. He waited as the phone rang once, twice, and on the third ring she answered with a smile. “Hello?”

“I promise not to let you drop off the face of the earth but you have to promise you won’t let me do it to you.”

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep, Matt, because I won’t.”

He nodded. “Fine, just… assure me you won’t. Please.”

Sighing, she smiled. He was trying, which was all she could ask for right now. “Alright. I assure you. No promises unless we know we’ll keep them. Okay?”

Matt laughed, but agreed. They talked for a couple more minutes but then said their goodbyes and hung up. When Matt got off the phone, he noticed the bus was moving. They were heading out. Alex walked over to him when he noticed he wasn’t busy. “I’m just curious what you’re doing.”

“What do you mean?”

“With Kylie, what are you doing? Are you trying to win her back or something?”

“No, I’m just trying to get her to trust me again. Once that happens, well… I don’t know what’s going to happen. We’re trying to be friends again, though. That’s all.”

Alex didn’t say anymore. He didn’t want to piss his friend off, but he was worried about both Kylie and Matt. Maybe they were meant to be together, but it seemed that before they could get to that perfect point they had to endure a lot of shit and to Alex, he just wasn’t sure if it was worth it.

But, it wasn’t any of his business so he was going to chose to stay out of it. At least for now.