Don't Blame Me for Being Me

I woke at 3 a.m. because someone was jolting and shaking me asking a cigarette lighter. It was Dasha and Olia. “Let’s go out to smoke”, they said. To my surprise I got up and found the lighter. We didn’t dare to go at the porch and made our way to the kitchen calling for Olya. So we four sat there, match cigarettes and began talking. After 40 minutes and four cigarettes (each) we came to the lounge, crawled on the couch with our feet and leaned our backs against a sleeping body of Ross. We switched on DVD player and began listening Eminem, 50 cent and the rest of their crew singing along. Ryan woke up of course. He greeted us with some discontent in his voice and gave a peck at Dasha’s cheek. Then he got up and walked out somewhere. We covered ourselves by some blankets to our toes. The rest of the night we were imagining ourselves as G-Unit. Dasha came out some times to check Ryan. He could take offence or something. So she was with him for some time. I discovered it when I came to my bedroom to check my sleepy drunken boy. I saw Dasha, Ross and Brendon in my bed. Bren was sleeping in the same pose I left him. I cursed at him but knew he didn’t hear and covered him by his blanket more ‘cause it was lying almost on a floor.
“The awful scent from Bren, especially from his mouth and breathing, doesn’t make you two run away outta here?” I asked Dasha and Ryan.
They giggled. I gave them a weird look.
“It’s normal, Ira”, Ryan replied to my look.
“It’s still possible to breath here”, Dasha chuckled.
I returned to the lounge and began asking Olya about Jon, about what they were doing and other. She didn’t tell me much or she was talking too much vaguely for me at that time. So I didn’t get they had the final top of that night or not. Dasha came later and we were 50 cent’s crew till the morning walking at the kitchen some time that to smoke.
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When it was 8 a.m., we eventually turned off the DVD and crawled under the blankets. Almost the whole house was in smoky fog. We began ventilate it. We opened some windows and exit door and we were helping the scent go away by waving newspapers. After a half of an hour we closed windows (we have winter behind it after all). We four dressed and decided to clean the lounge by brining dirty plates from the lounge to the kitchen. After having a little breakfast and a chat Olia left us for her fiancé who called her to home by her phone. Olya went to her home after some time too. Boys were sleeping and Dasha and me were left alone with a big pile of dirty dishes. There was nothing to do with that just to wake somebody. Dasha moved on the stove to Spencer.
“Spencie, get up. It’s late”, she said to him.
I was standing below leaning against a wall. So I guess Spence was calling Olia. But alas,… there was not her here. Dasha consoled Spence as well as she could. As mother does it to her son. But anyways he refused to come down.
“You wanna me to put more firewood in stove? It’ll be hotter and you’ll get down yourself soon”, I made a threat and walked to Jon.
I woke him and grieved him saying Olya had gone to her home. He had a little disappointment but I promised we would visit her in the afternoon. He began dressing and I walked to the drunken mug of my boyfriend who was jumping around the house yesterday so much that it was impossible to stop him. So I made my way to the bedroom and sat next to him. Ryan was lying near. Dasha came too. I looked at Bren’s face. On my gosh! It was in an awful state! His face was crumpled like an old newspaper and puffed as if he was trying to thieve honey from a beehive last night.
“Is Ross alive?” Dasha asked.
“Sure thing. In comparison with my jerk, Ross is a fresh like rose in the dawning”, I smirked.
“Why he’s lying and not budging?” She asked again.
“He must dance?” I joked.
“No, but may be he feels bad?”
“Wake and ask him”, I advised.
“Now?”
“No, tomorrow”.
Dasha jolted him a couple of times. I got up and walked into the kitchen for a cup of water. I thought it would be first Brendon would want after waking. So then I returned. Boys were lying like before.
“Are you gonna wake Ryan?” I asked Dasha.
“I’m doing it but I’m getting no reaction”, she replied.
“Slap his cheeks”, I made an advice.
But she didn’t use it and just was shaking his body screaming “wake up! Do you hear me? Wake up!” Soon after he woke, of course. He looked very bad. As if he was beaten last night. I had to give him the water and walk for another cup. I returned, opened a window and began making Bren to wake up. I was shaking him hard. I was beating his cheeks. I was blocking his breathing. No reaction. I could wake him only with help of an old Soviet Union alarm-clock. I brought it ringing to Bren’s ear. He even sat when he heard an awful sound the alarm caused. And Ryan screamed of that sound.
“What’s it?” they asked loudly almost in unison.
We began quieting them down. Dasha laid Ross again on the bed. I carefully made Bren to drink water.
“Do you wanna see what you look like?” I asked him.
“Nooo”, he made a hoarse sound and lay again.
“Don’t dare to sleep! You’re not ill. We’ll go for a walk”, I said firmly.
“Okay”, he said covering himself by a blanket.
“You know,” I said to Dasha. “Let’s them rest and sleep. I dislike looking at them and their miserable state. We’ll go without them”.
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So we left Ryan and Brendon to get well at home. Ryan was able to serve to himself and his friend too. That’s why there was easy for everybody to leave them. Jon and me went to Olya, Dasha and Spence went just for walk and skate from a small hill that to blow away sadness about Olia’s leaving.
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Then Jon and me returned from our walking. I think we went for 5 km around the whole village. I showed him all the places linking to my childhood. We spent very good time. Olya was with us too. Jon swore Belarusian girls are the most beautiful in the world! Yeah, it’s a true. I like Jon noticed it. so when we returned Bren was already lying on the couch in the living room. It’s a big progress!  Then I heard clattering of pans from the kitchen. It was Ryan who was trying to find some food. He walked to us and in accordance to his face we understood his searching wasn’t successful. So i dressed into my apparel for home and fed Ryan and Jon. Bren was out of his consciousness not wishing to eat. Due to I was busy at the kitchen my curses and swearing at him were delayed at some time. Dasha and Spence were still out somewhere till a deep dark. At 6 or 7 p.m. they came home being red-faced and merry.
“where were you hanging so late?” Ryan asked giving Dasha a hug.
“I see you got well, yeah? You do don’t drink. Why you got drunk so much yesterday? It’s contraindicated to you”, it was her greeting.
“Now I know it. I overestimated my abilities. So where were you hanging?” Ryan asked again.
To that time Spence already crept onto the stove and began warming himself.
“We flicked off snow from trees and bushes!” Spence exclaimed.
“We were skating at sledge from a hill. And Spence lost his gloves like a last jerk”, Dasha explained more easily to boys.
We laughed.
“We’ll look for it tomorrow. Now go to eat”, I said and made my way to Brendon.
He was lying with his eyes being opened but he didn’t react at any actions from the world. I began cursing and swearing at him for his awful that state. I was asking him why the hell he was trying to drink more than me, why it was a need to demonstrate his underwear, why he was taking away Spence’s girl from Spence, of course, why he was singing bawdy and vulgar songs about some prostitute and her clients (as I could make out the meaning of that songs yesterday). His response was just rising of his eyebrows that asked me “it was all about me?” To the end I said he looked as if he was biten by bees. The rest of the evening people spent watching TV. I left them and went to the bedroom. I decided to work at my laptop. I need to take one work in the end of this study term so I began looking for some information in The Internet and typing some texts from papers, I’d taken with me here in Belarus. So I was all in my deals when Bren barged into the room. He came up to the bed rolling and lied on it.
“How are you?” I asked him without breaking to work.
“Uh, fine”, I heard his response.
“It’s awful! To have a hard hangover during the whole day!” I said.
He mumbled something and fell asleep as I could guess. Then there was calmer in the house. people began going to their beds. I kept typing. And I think I carried away with it because I watched at clocks and saw it was around 1 a.m. So I switched off the laptop and began changing for my night clothes. And by chance I woke Bren.
“What time is it? I need to get up?” he asked and sat up.
“No”, I replied wiping off my make up.
“I don’t orient in time here at all. When you say it’s morning I believe and get up”, Bren said.
I laughed. It was a complete true. He never gets up by himself yet here. I always wake him.
“No, now it’s time to sleep”, I said eventually lying on the bed and covered myself by blanket.
“I don’t wanna”, he said and rolled to my side.
“It’s your problem”, I snapped.
So and the next three hours he didn’t let me sleep. At first he was talking, then he was making lame attempts to make me wish having sex with him. For a couple of times I walked in the kitchen hoping that while I would be out he fell asleep. But no! There was no sign of wishing to sleep from his side. For that to fall asleep I even threw him off from the bed. But he let me sleep only when I threatened I would go to sleep to Walker. So then he calmed down. But it’s all the same I fell asleep only about 4 a.m. or something and he fell asleep at once. He’s just a pig!!!