Don't Blame Me for Being Me

The same day.
When we began feeling ourselves as well as it could possible at that time, phone rang. It was my mom. I was speaking with her trying to hide my bad hangover. The only thing I understood from her speech and questions about my and Dasha’s rest is that I must wash linen and many others. Of course, to wash without cleaning up the house is wrong. So, a big work lay ahead to us. And by the way when Ross and Bren found out (from my mom’s call and my explanations) that my parents and parents of Dasha are just about 80 km from our spot, they wanted so much to see and meet them. It was weird (though it was funny how they were asking about the meeting with our parents), so Dasha and me just called it quits. The question was closed.
Then we all ate fastly and started A Great Cleaning in the house. At first, everybody cleared the table with snacks and drinks from yesterday and cleaned the lounge. Then I made Jon and Spence to take off all linen from all of beds and I gave them a new one. Bren began cleaning with a vacuum cleaner, Ryan was picking our stuffs around the house. I began washing and Dasha kept managing the cleaning. Usually my mom or me hang washed stuff on several strings stretched out at the yard in order to dry the stuff. That time wasn’t exception. So after washing and rinsing I was laying the washed pillow cases and sheets into some basins. Bren was bringing them at the yard; Ryan was hanging it onto the strings. Jon and Spence kept cleaning the house. As there were many us it took not much time cleaning and washing. And I would wash less time if one funny thing wasn’t happened. So I was standing in a bath and rinsing another party of washed stuff when I heard Bren’s voice behind.
“Ira, I dropped that basin”, he said.
I turned to him and burst laughing after watching him. He was standing all over wet with a kind of a sorry face and with dirty rags which were tidy and white brilliant before. He began laughing along with me. So I had to wash that again and he had to change his clothes.
Along with our cleaning we ventilated the house (flowers in pots standing on shelves began drooping because of scent of our parties). After that we began packing our cases without hurrying ‘cause we have to leave in two days. We decided. So hard to leave this place…
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May be I misunderstood something from my mom’s speech or may be she just didn’t say but…
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We were in the lounge resting when the exit door was opened and my dad stepped into the corridor. And he stood-still right there with bags in his hands being surprised.
“Oh, daddy came!” I exclaimed into Russian, run to him to take the bags and bring them at the kitchen.
In the same time Dasha greeted my dad and explained that situation to the boys. Dad took off overcoat, cap and shoes and walked into the lounge. I followed him.
“Dad, it’s our friends from America”, I said and introduced each other.
“Dad? You?” Bren asked with a respect.
Bren decided to greet my father personally and began talking and expressing how much he was glad to meet my dad and how much time he wanted to do it. Of course, he didn’t forget to say he’s my boyfriend. My dad gave me a surprised look wishing my confirmation that someday I choose Bren as my bf, because (he told me later) I didn’t have such slim boyfriend (to be honestly it’s true, Bren is really the smallest and thinnest of my boyfriends).
In the evening we altogether had a dinner I made. Then question about place of resting stood in front of us. My dad likes TV. There is one TV in our house and it’s in the lounge. We had to give my dad the room and huddle resting in another bedroom (Jon and Spence were nice to let all of us place there). Some part of the evening I spent with my dad talking and watching some wrestling match on TV (it’s his fav kind of sport). Then I returned to the guys. Dasha and Ryan were talking. Spence was reading something. Jon was doing smth at his mobile. Bren was deep in his thoughts (may be of meeting my dad). That’s why I switch on his laptop and began playing Need For Speed (yeah, the way I like doing it, though I had to swear lower). Jon and Spence joined me watching my inimitable racings.
There was nowhere for Bren and me to sleep ‘cause that bedroom was of my parents. So one parent returned to take his bed place. As another bedroom has two separate beds, Bren and me made Jon get out and directed him on the stove. He wasn’t upset very much and didn’t resist. Spence was upset ‘cause he had plans about the stove. No matter, he’ll go through it. To 12 p.m. I convinced my dad who occupied the couch in the lounge to go to his bedroom ‘cause Dasha and Ryan needed to sleep. Our now bed with Bren was more narrow and abruptly differed from our previous one. So Bren and me were lying very close with entangled legs and holding each other (Bren was afraid to fall down). There was no sleep for us and we heard Dasha and Ross were getting across. Not much loudly but it was possible to hear. Plus we couldn’t fall asleep. So we began talking hoping that after few sentences we began having sweet dreams.
“After coming to USA I would be completely busy in Vegas”, Bren said.
“Oh”, I made a sad sound.
“It’s all your reaction?” he chuckled.
“Yeah and don’t wait for something else”, I snapped with a cheesy smile.
“What’s about your studying?” he asked.
“My lessons will begin in one or two weeks. So I’ll be able to come to Vegas may be”, I added and looked at him.
“We’ll think later. I wanna fall asleep”, he stated.
“May be if Ross stop buzzing there we’ll get a chance”, I said.
“I had so cool time here”, Bren rolled his eyes.
I giggled reminiscing all of cool moments at once. So then we were just chuckling for the next few minutes not saying any word.
“People, stop laughing. I’m sleeping”, we heard Spence’s voice.
“Fuck, I miss our room”, Bren groaned.
“Bren, listen. In almost every English book in our belarusian schools the example for Present Continuous Tense was “Silence! The child is sleeping”. It’s about Spence, I think”, I said.
We laughed again.
“Dudes, cut the cackle!” Spence said again.
“Yeah, our room was just a heaven”, I joked.
“No. it’s better. Especially when there are you with a bottle of wine in your hand saying about striptease”, he smiled.
“Just try to say you didn’t like that!” I joked. ‘Cause it’s no matter (I liked).
“Haha. I won’t. Let’s try to sleep. I hear Ross’s ending his emotional speech”, Bren said.
“You’re afraid to fall down, aren’t you?” I smiled.
“You’ll hold me”, he was very confident (he-he).
“So how I will sleep? Oh, I have idea. Let’s sleep by turns”, I suggested.
But I didn’t exact what turn was first and we fell asleep together. However, nobody rolled down from the bed.
The next morning.
The first thing I saw after waking and sitting up in the bed was Ryan who was sitting in opposite armchair and reading some book.
“You don’t care to put on pants, aristocrat?” I asked him with discontent voice.
He just laughed.
“I’m serious, Ryan. Ugh, how fine it was to have a separate room”, I crashed on the bed again.
I woke Bren. He sat straight, looked at Ryan and then at Spence who sprawled at his bed sleeping and snoring a little.
“It’s a hostel, not a normal house”, he said.
“It’s forbidden to sit here?” Ross asked with a little irritation.
“What’s about sitting in the lounge?” I asked lying behind Bren.
“I don’t speak with Dasha and don’t want to sit there. It’s warmer here”, he explained.
“You didn’t let us sleep this night and now you’ve came here! And without pants!” I said.
“Fuck you, dudes. There are only three rooms in this house. I should go to your dad’s bed?” Ross replied.
“Err, Ross, what a wild fantasy?” Bren said.
“Calm down, Ross. Sit here if you want”, I said and rolled onto my stomach.
“I don’t want already. As Spence said, you’re evil people”, Ross said with offensive.
As I buried my face in my pillow, I didn’t see them. Probably Ross wanted to go because Bren told him “take it easy, man. Sit, read…you don’t bother us”.
“I can’t believe in my happiness”, Ross replied ironically.
“May be we should lay you between us that to make you believe completely?” I joked.
“Thanks, but no”, he replied.
Then they began talking. I stopped listening to them after a while and decided to check on Dasha. So I got into the living room. Dasha was lying with puffed eyes and staring at the ceiling. She has been crying I thought.
“I don’t believe you cried because of Ross”, I said taking a seat next to her.
“Just slightly”, she replied.
So as it was found out Ross invites Dasha to go in Vegas, to live together there if to be exactly. He invites her during last two days. Of course, last night too. Dasha refused him. Her explanations of it and refusal itself offended Ross. He said something wrong and so now they doesn’t speak and sit in different rooms.
Ross is a complete fool. He doesn’t understand such removal is a serious step in relationships? One case is to have nights in our house and spend weekends there and complete another one is to begin living together. He must understand that Dasha doesn’t want to take this step. And to be offended for it is childish at all. So I said all of this to Dasha.
“He went crazy or he loves you very much. Both of it is equally possible”, I added.
“I’d think of if he proposed may be. For what I should go there? What I’ll get? I have friends, job and home in LA. What will I do in Vegas? Look for a new job? In another boutique? Or may be just in some fucking store? Fine, he’s a celebrity and I work in shop!” Dasha said.
“yeah, he made a brilliant suggestion”, I said with irony.
“or may be he wants me not to work at all and live spending his money?”
“so it’d be better to propose. Though you date not much time. I think Ross just doesn’t know what he wants. He totally failed”.
“even if he proposed I’d say no. just it’s a pity! He would be able to make a normal suggestion, not such one he did”, she said.
So the whole morning and other time till the evening Ross wasn’t talking. Dasha was rowing with him and hurling things. He was just looking from under his forehead and keeping silence. After morning speaking with Dasha I said to Ross that he’s a jerk. He began not speaking with me too.
So after some minutes of their bust-up Bren and me walked out in the kitchen. Jon was walking in the yard the whole day. Spence was trying to find any solution for Dasha and Ryan.
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My dad was still at his work so Bren and me decided to have a nostalgia in our former bedroom. So we got into it and were spending time there rolling on and lying about the bed. But our “happiness” was not so pure as we thought we’d have. As my dad has forgotten his mobile I had to pick up it many time to answer those who called. The most of them were known to me from my childhood summers of which I’d spent at my dad’s job among cars and tractors sniffing scent of gasoline, metal, oils and petrol. After each call I returned to Bren again.
The mobile rang one more time.
“Ugh, may be you’ll turn it off?” Bren said when he saw I got up to take the mobile again.
“I have to pick up. It can be important for dad”, I said stretching to the mobile.
I took it. I saw unknown but familiar number. Well, I picked up.
“hello”, I said into Russian of course.
“Ira? It’s you? This number still works? It’s me, Andrei”, a familiar, warm voice of him said.
I’ll explain. The number of my dad’s mobile had been mine a long time ago. And Andrei is my ex-boyfriend. My first real love and just gorgeous man. I became weak in the knees from emotion. I didn’t hear him for about two years.
“how?..you?..when?..you?..” I was just asking some incoherent questions.
“I just decided to call. I don’t know why. I didn’t think I would hear you, that you’d pick up”, he spoke fastly obviously being glad I picked up.
We broke up staying good friends. But since then we didn’t contact to each other. Nobody called or wrote each other. We broke up because of my removal into London. He stayed in his town - Tomsk, in Siberia, Russia.
So we had much to talk about. I left Bren and moved onto the stove in order to nobody bother me.