Vinyl Records:

Next morning, I walked out of my home, all alone. It was that time of the month again. No, I'm not talking about PMS, I'm actually talking about my depressions. They stroke harder and longer everyday, and today was no exception. It kind of made me happy: at least I had some form of consistency in my life. And if my depression is the only thing I can count on to be there, then so be it. I'm not that complex actually. I'm just a teenager who's seen too much, too early.

Haven't we all, though?

I was alone in a bus. Which was strange, considering how packed they usually were at this hour. I was headed to a far away part of my town, hell, it's even outside my town. But that didn't stop me. I wasn't afraid of being alone anymore. I've grown used to it the nights I used to drug myself up and drown myself in alcohol. And to think I used to laugh at the girls who did that. Pathetic, I used to call them. Well, Destiny, guess you had the last word. As always.

Everyday is nothing but stress to me, I`m constantly dwelling on how you got the best of me My phone started going off. I looked ahead and saw the driver look at me in his mirror. I turned my head away and answered it with a monotone voice. I didn't even bother to see who called me.

"Sally, hi. I just called to ask you if you can continue the story. If we can't meet, than we have to improvise, don't we?" She said giggling at the end. This was like a bad remake, I swear. The last thing I wanted to do today was talk about my messed up life thus getting me even more depressed. So I did the only thing that I could have done. I just shut up.

"Um, Sally? Are you busy? It-uh- it's Abigail, by the way. Oh God, I called in a bad time, didn't I? Uh-well- sorry. Guess I-I'll just go. Bye." She drawled awkwardly and I could just imagine her pacing around with the phone chewing on her nails nervously. Right before she shut the phone, I blurted out a quick and loud "No!".

I don't know why I did it. It just seemed the right thing to do. Even though I was going to get even more depressed, Abigail's call comforted me in some strange way, I couldn't recognize. The silence just kept going.

"Uh-it's alright. I can call later." She insisted.

"No, no. I guess, what do you want to know?" I asked her the standard question. By that time, I was walking the short walk till I reached the store I looked for.

"Friendships." Came her short reply, that made the awkward silence just keep going.

"Well, let's talk about my final friendship. When the eighth grade came, we were all on speaking terms again. We even had a new addition: Lily. The blond, freckled one, one of the boys yet painfully one of the girls as well. She was just a dilemma, and I mean that in the best way possible. So, we faced a bump in our roads. There was six of us, and only two seats in a bench. Because of that, we made a pact to switch seats every two weeks so everyone could sit with someone else and get to know them better. But then, Dina came into the group as well. Welcomed by me, I suppose. Her boyfriend was Jack's best friend. So if I ever wanted to get to Jack - she was my way to him. We clicked after a while and suddenly there were seven of us. We had to get her into our pact as well. I was first to sit next to her, of course. Jack was right behind me and the teasing games began, all because of my sitting chart. If any other girl moved in my place; he would tease her too. And that bugged me. I felt selfish: I only wanted him for myself. And no other way. During the one month I sat with Dina, I became a nastier person. Sure, I was getting closer and closer to Jack, but Dina's fiery personality didn't work to her best- or mine. Sometimes she was a bit controlling, and most of the people found her quite the bitch. But none had the courage to say it. She was newly transformed into this 'bad girl', at least look wise. I began to argue with everyone, ignore my true friends and only talk to her -inside school and out. I ignored everyone. Then, one day, she came up to me and asked me if I wanted to go to this underground club thing with her." I talked softly into the speakers. I didn't want to look like a weirdo who was feigning talking on the cell.

Flashback

"Hey, Salls, wanna go to Cherri?" Dina said, approaching me confidently, smiling an evil smile.

I just nodded my head. "What's Cherri?" I asked in a quiet voice. She looked at me like she was astounded at my lack of knowledge. I just smiled and looked elsewhere.

"What? You never heard of Cherri before?" She said squeaking, holding everyone's attention. I blushed in annoyance and answered her snappily.

"If I knew, then I wouldn't be asking, now would I?" She just smirked at my balls and explained to me what it was. Basically it was like an basement with Arabic music in which people smoke hookah. Apparently it got you incredibly high, but it didn't damage your lungs because it didn't have any nicotine. Apparently.

This had bad written all over it. But I knew that if I wanted to break out, and have Jack admire me, then I would have to suck it up and go through with it. Besides, being high couldn't be so bad, could it? I nodded my head again and watched Dina disappear grinning.

I still had this bad feeling in the pit of my stomach but I just ignored it and followed her out. From that month on, I just started doing worse and worse things. Smoking, drinking, fighting with everyone, sneaking off, cutting class, lying to my parents, lying to my friends, snapping at everything.. We changed up seats, but I still remained like that, though trying to hide it from you. You were my friends again, and I didn't want to risk losing my comfort zone.

But the moment that really got me was five months ago: when I got high for the first time on drugs.

Guess you should listen to that voice inside your head after all, that's if you don't want to get cut off from everything, like I did.