Who Can Really Blame You?

Carter pushes me against his bedroom wall, the posters rustling behind my back, kissing me. This time when he licks at my bottom lip, I open my mouth and let him take control. He presses his body into mine and moans out my name. I groan as he starts in on my neck. He kisses me right on my pulse, and I moan, before he kisses below my ear, making me moan louder than before. I turn red, and he smirks into my skin, before his hand starts trailing down my chest, and moves to unbutton my jeans.

I sit straight up in bed, gasping. My hair is plastered to my forehead with sweat, and I look down at my lap, before turning red in real life.

Aunt Carol drops the papers in front of me, and I stare at them.

“Oh,” I say, “Thank you.”

“No problem. Sorry it took me three days to get them for you,” she tells me, “I looked into your financial stuff, and you have a bank account that you can access when you’re a legal adult, which will be in three days, after the trial. It’s a lot of money, too.”

“Who’s it from?” I ask.

“My mom,” she says, “Your grandmother. She never told us about it though.”

“Maybe she knew,” I suggest, making my aunt roll her eyes.

“You want to know how much?” she asks. I look at her.

“Yes,” I decide.

She doesn’t speak, simply pulls another paper from a folder in he briefcase. She slides it to me face down. I turn it over.

“Where’d she get $80,000?!” I exclaim.

“That’s just for college,” she says, “Keep reading.”

“This is a hundred thousand dollars,” I tell her. She nods, smiling.

“Why me?” I ask.

“You were her only grandkid,” she tells me, “You can’t get to the eighty thousand until you’re at least 21 or you’re going to school, but the twenty is for anything you need. You can easily get an apartment for yourself.”

I stare at the paper.

“This is awesome,” I say.

“You’re getting what you deserve,” she says, “After putting up with your dad that long; I really wish I had something to give you.”

I smile at her. “This is enough,” I say, laughing. She rolls her eyes again.

“I have to go to work,” she says, “You can have people over if you want… Well if they can get here and back by themselves.”

I nod and she kisses me on the forehead before leaving.

I feel better.

It’s only money, but it’s exactly what I need right now. Something might finally work out for me. I can even get myself a car… well, a cheap one, anyways. I’m not trying to blow this.

My phone starts ringing in my pocket as I’m changing the bandages on my feet. I finish my left foot and answer.

“Hello?” I ask.

“Hey,” Tayler says, “You’re at your aunts?”

“Yeah,” I say, “Why?”

“Oh, can we come over?” he asks.

“If you can get here…” I tell him.

“We can!” he says, “See you in an hour!”

I roll my eyes after he’s hung up, and go to work on my right foot. I pull off all the Band-Aids and dip my foot into the water in the tub, before washing all the dirt and blood off, and splashing come alcohol onto the cuts, making me wince at the sudden stinging. I dry my foot and start wrapping it up too. I look at my feet, bandaged up and stand on them. I wince slightly, but recognize the fact that it hurts a lot less badly than it did last night when there were little rocks and broken glass stuck in my feet. I had to pull them all out myself and slap some Band-Aids on until I could properly wrap my feet when I wasn’t so exhausted.

I glance in the mirror, and make a face at the bruises on my neck. I rub them as the doorbell rings. I go to answer it, but Hadley’s already entered, and I hear Tayler and Talia arguing outside.

“Ainsley!” she exclaims, rushing to hug me, “What happened to your neck?”

She throws her arms around me as I answer. “He tried to choke me,” I tell her. She pulls away from me, and looks me up and down to look for any other injuries.

“Your feet?” she asks, looking at me.

“I ran and didn’t have any shoes on,” I shrug, glancing at the door, “What are they doing outside?”

“Arguing with Carter,” she says. I feel my face pale as the door swings open the whole way and Talia and Tayler pull Carter inside. We don’t look at each other. I stare at my feet.

Talia takes my hand, and Tayler grabs Carter. They pull us both down the hallway.

“Talia,” I say, trying to shake my arm free, “Stop!”

“No,” she says, pushing me into my own room. I stumble and fall onto my stomach. “Sorry!” she calls after me. I turn over and sit up, glaring at her, as Tayler shoves Carter inside too. They close the door, and when Carter tries it, they proclaim proudly that they’ve tied a jump rope to the handle on my door and the bathroom handle too. Well, they’re locked out of the bathroom for awhile anyways then.

“Locked in!” Talia says happily. I remain seated on the floor, while Carter tries the handle a few more times. I move to the bed to sit. Carter sighs, and turns to face me.

“Hey,” he says quietly, awkwardly.

“Don’t worry,” I mutter, “I won’t make some gay move on you.”

Carter doesn’t answer that, just shoves his hands into his pockets.

“I’m not worried about that,” he says finally, “Seeing as you hate me.”

“Why do you think that?” I ask, staring at my wrapped up feet.

“Yesterday,” he shrugs.

“I’m pretty sure I said I felt the opposite of hate for you,” I mutter as he approaches the bed.

“You didn’t act like you liked me at all,” he replies, sitting down next to me.

“When you kissed me?” I ask, getting sarcastic, “Because you would be psyched if someone you like kissed you even though they didn’t mean it.”

“How do you know I didn’t mean it? You always assume shit,” he says, exasperatedly.

“You’re straight! Meaning, you don’t like guys! I’m not a girl, Carter,” I exclaim. He stays silent.

“Why are we locked in here?” I demand.

He mumbles something.

“What?” I ask him. He looks straight at me.

“They wanted me to come out to you,” he says. I stare at him.

“What?” I ask.

“I always wondered why Kate never turned me on. She’s beautiful, but I never really wanted to kiss her or touch her or anything. Then I met you guys, and I realized why. It had honestly never even occurred to me that I didn’t like girls,” he says quickly, like he’s afraid that he’ll stop from nervousness.

“So you kissed me to make sure you really do like guys?” I ask. Carter nods, obviously relieved. “That’s still mean,” I tell him, making him look at me, “But thank you for telling me.”

He nods, and I stand to go to the door. I knock on it.

“We made up!” I yell, and hear the jump rope being untied. The door opens to reveal a smiling Talia.

“Good,” she says. Carter hasn’t moved yet.

“Come on,” I tell him. He stands slowly and heads out of the room, following me.