Break This Awkward Silence
It reaches in and tears your flesh apart
A week later Val had talked Alex into having a barbecue in her backyard.
They were currently standing in the kitchen preparing a salad while Matt and Zacky were manning the grill and the rest of the guys were looking after Gracie.
“Why do we always end up with the shitty jobs?” Val asked as she flicked seeds out of the pepper she was cutting with the edge of her knife.
“Cause I don’t trust any of those boys with sharp implements?” Alex shrugged.
Val snorted, “True.”
They continued in relative silence, the sounds of AFI coming through from the living room.
“So what’s the deal with you and Bri?” Val asked for maybe the hundredth time that week.
Alex rolled her eyes as she dumped sliced cucumber into the large wooden bowl between them, “Nothing’s changed since the last time you asked.”
“Just checking,” Val smiled as she tossed her peppers into the bowl before heading outside with it.
Alex was clearing up around the kitchen when Brian appeared.
“Hi,” he smiled.
“Hey. More beer?” she asked.
“You know it,” he replied as he pulled open the refrigerator.
The phone rang suddenly and Alex frowned at it, “Everyone’s here.”
Brian watched as she took the short call, her face fell and she quickly hung up.
“Everything alright?” he asked as he placed the six pack of beer in his hands on the counter.
Alex ran her hands through her hair and looked over at him, “Uh, I don’t know. Not really. My dad’s dead.”
“Shit,” Brian breathed.
“Yeah,” she frowned, “Is it bad that I don’t feel anything?”
He shook his head, “No. Feel whatever you want to feel.”
“I don’t know what I want to feel. I can’t believe he’s dead,” she said softly.
Brian walked over to her and placed his arms around her waist, half expecting her to push him off of her. Instead she gripped the front of his shirt with her hands.
“He’s gone,” she whispered.
“Who called you?” he asked as he ran a hand up and down her back soothingly.
“My cousin, Kat. My own fucking mother couldn’t call me.”
“Maybe she’s not up to calling people,” Brian offered.
Alex shook her head, “You don’t have to make excuses for her Brian. Where’s Gracie?”
“Out back with Val. Want me to go get her?”
Alex thought about it and shook her head, “I don’t want to freak her out, she doesn’t need to know. She never met the guy so she’s not affected by it.”
“What about you?” Brian asked, looking down at the top of her head.
“I’m fine,” she lied, her grip on his shirt tightened and she turned her head so that her cheek was against his chest.
“D’you want me to get Val?” he asked.
“No, can you stay, please?” she asked softly.
Brian kissed the top of her head gently, “I’m not going anywhere until you tell me otherwise.”
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They were currently standing in the kitchen preparing a salad while Matt and Zacky were manning the grill and the rest of the guys were looking after Gracie.
“Why do we always end up with the shitty jobs?” Val asked as she flicked seeds out of the pepper she was cutting with the edge of her knife.
“Cause I don’t trust any of those boys with sharp implements?” Alex shrugged.
Val snorted, “True.”
They continued in relative silence, the sounds of AFI coming through from the living room.
“So what’s the deal with you and Bri?” Val asked for maybe the hundredth time that week.
Alex rolled her eyes as she dumped sliced cucumber into the large wooden bowl between them, “Nothing’s changed since the last time you asked.”
“Just checking,” Val smiled as she tossed her peppers into the bowl before heading outside with it.
Alex was clearing up around the kitchen when Brian appeared.
“Hi,” he smiled.
“Hey. More beer?” she asked.
“You know it,” he replied as he pulled open the refrigerator.
The phone rang suddenly and Alex frowned at it, “Everyone’s here.”
Brian watched as she took the short call, her face fell and she quickly hung up.
“Everything alright?” he asked as he placed the six pack of beer in his hands on the counter.
Alex ran her hands through her hair and looked over at him, “Uh, I don’t know. Not really. My dad’s dead.”
“Shit,” Brian breathed.
“Yeah,” she frowned, “Is it bad that I don’t feel anything?”
He shook his head, “No. Feel whatever you want to feel.”
“I don’t know what I want to feel. I can’t believe he’s dead,” she said softly.
Brian walked over to her and placed his arms around her waist, half expecting her to push him off of her. Instead she gripped the front of his shirt with her hands.
“He’s gone,” she whispered.
“Who called you?” he asked as he ran a hand up and down her back soothingly.
“My cousin, Kat. My own fucking mother couldn’t call me.”
“Maybe she’s not up to calling people,” Brian offered.
Alex shook her head, “You don’t have to make excuses for her Brian. Where’s Gracie?”
“Out back with Val. Want me to go get her?”
Alex thought about it and shook her head, “I don’t want to freak her out, she doesn’t need to know. She never met the guy so she’s not affected by it.”
“What about you?” Brian asked, looking down at the top of her head.
“I’m fine,” she lied, her grip on his shirt tightened and she turned her head so that her cheek was against his chest.
“D’you want me to get Val?” he asked.
“No, can you stay, please?” she asked softly.
Brian kissed the top of her head gently, “I’m not going anywhere until you tell me otherwise.”
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