Status: Awesomely awesome.
Spiderdom and the Quest for the Sky Cat
in which we discuss badassness.
“Now, smile real wide for me, come on Matt, I know you can look more evil than that.” Dr. Dementia glared at Tom… ahem… Dr. Gloom, who was hidden behind an abnormally large and obnoxious camera, taking photos while Dr. Dementia glared.
“It’s Dr. Dementia,” He adjusted his goggles to make him look more evil before laughing at the camera. “Are you sure people will think this is scary? I mean I am a super villain… Shouldn’t we let my work speak for itself?”
“How do you think badasses like Venom got famous? Doing bad things? Please! They get their photo taken and then everyone thinks they’re badass… it’s how this whole system works.” Tom moved slightly, adjusting his camera angles, making Dr. Dementia’s cheekbones more prominent and therefore more… evil.
“I guess you’re right. Hey, where’s Dom? DOM, BOY! GET HERE NOW!” Dr. Dementia stared at the door, waiting for his little servant boy to come and do his bidding.
Dom appeared at the door after a little while. “Yes, Matt?”
“It’s Dr. Dementia!” the evil doctor yelled before muttering, “Why does everyone keep doing that?”
“Fine, Dr. Dementia, what do you want? I don’t have all day.”
“I just wanted to know where you were. What could you possibly have to do? Wait, what’s this I spy? Are you wearing bright blue socks?” Dr. Dementia squinted at the lower half of Dom’s legs.
“What? Oh, yeah. You know me… I like to wear brightly coloured things so today I thought I’d wear bright blue socks…” Dom looked behind him before turning back and asking, “Is there anything else you need?”
Dr. Dementia thought for a while before waving his hand, dismissing Dom.
As he walked down the hallway towards his desk, Dom thought about how he had almost gotten caught. Twice. He needed to do a few things – he needed to buy some longer pants, he needed to buy some shirts that were actually capable of covering his super suit (which he had to admit was a bit of a rip off of Spiderman’s but Dom pulled it off much better) anyway, back on subject, Dom also needed to get some shirts that were easier to rip off so that he could go save peoples’ lives, or at least attempt to.
The phone’s high-pitched ring snapped Dom out of his thought. After sighing dramatically he answered it.
“Hello, Dr. Dementia’s office, Dom speaking. How can I help you?”
“Hey Dom, it’s the Chrisonator. I was just calling to let Dr. Dementia know that he should watch his back.”
“Would you like to talk to him? Or would you rather I took a message?”
“I’ll talk to him I think, yeah, taunt him.” The Chrisonator sounded as though he was pumping himself up.
“Ok, I’ll just put you on hold,” Dom pressed the hold button and wandered back towards the room that was currently inhabited by both doctors. “Doctor, there’s a call from the Chrisonator for you. He’s on line one.”
Dom was just about to turn before Dr. Dementia called, “Thanks, Dominic, I’ll take it from your phone if that’s OK. Well, it doesn’t matter if it isn’t, because I’m going to take it from your phone anyway.” He spun dramatically and waltzed out the room, leaving Dr. Gloom and Dom alone.
“Bright blue socks? Really?” Dr. Gloom smirked to himself while Dom tried to pull his pants down just far enough to cover the bright blue of his super suit.
“I like bright blue! It’s very… nice.”
“Dom, I know what you are.” Dr. Gloom looked serious.
“Good looking? Underpaid? Hungry?” Dom started frantically thinking of a way out of this situation.
“No, Dom. I know you’re, well, gay.”
“What?! I’m not, I’m not… gay.”
“Dom, there’s no use lying about it. Why else would you do everything Dr. Dementia tells you? It’s OK, though. I won’t tell him.” Dr. Gloom patted Dom on the shoulder just as Matt walked in.
“Well, I’m glad that’s over! The Chrisonator decided he needed to tell me to watch my back and then we started talking about pasta: he wants to know my recipe.”
“Did you give it to him?” Dr. Gloom took his hand off Dom’s shoulder.
“Yes, but, seeing as I am evil, I left out a key ingredient!”
“Very good, very evil.” Dr. Gloom nodded. Dom noted down the fact that Dr. Gloom was a massive kiss-ass.
“But what were you guys talking about while I was gone?” Dr. Dementia looked at Dom expectantly, bug-eyed.
“Apartheid…” Dom looked over at Dr. Gloom, who nodded.
“It’s wrong.”
“Oh… fair enough, then.”
“It’s Dr. Dementia,” He adjusted his goggles to make him look more evil before laughing at the camera. “Are you sure people will think this is scary? I mean I am a super villain… Shouldn’t we let my work speak for itself?”
“How do you think badasses like Venom got famous? Doing bad things? Please! They get their photo taken and then everyone thinks they’re badass… it’s how this whole system works.” Tom moved slightly, adjusting his camera angles, making Dr. Dementia’s cheekbones more prominent and therefore more… evil.
“I guess you’re right. Hey, where’s Dom? DOM, BOY! GET HERE NOW!” Dr. Dementia stared at the door, waiting for his little servant boy to come and do his bidding.
Dom appeared at the door after a little while. “Yes, Matt?”
“It’s Dr. Dementia!” the evil doctor yelled before muttering, “Why does everyone keep doing that?”
“Fine, Dr. Dementia, what do you want? I don’t have all day.”
“I just wanted to know where you were. What could you possibly have to do? Wait, what’s this I spy? Are you wearing bright blue socks?” Dr. Dementia squinted at the lower half of Dom’s legs.
“What? Oh, yeah. You know me… I like to wear brightly coloured things so today I thought I’d wear bright blue socks…” Dom looked behind him before turning back and asking, “Is there anything else you need?”
Dr. Dementia thought for a while before waving his hand, dismissing Dom.
As he walked down the hallway towards his desk, Dom thought about how he had almost gotten caught. Twice. He needed to do a few things – he needed to buy some longer pants, he needed to buy some shirts that were actually capable of covering his super suit (which he had to admit was a bit of a rip off of Spiderman’s but Dom pulled it off much better) anyway, back on subject, Dom also needed to get some shirts that were easier to rip off so that he could go save peoples’ lives, or at least attempt to.
The phone’s high-pitched ring snapped Dom out of his thought. After sighing dramatically he answered it.
“Hello, Dr. Dementia’s office, Dom speaking. How can I help you?”
“Hey Dom, it’s the Chrisonator. I was just calling to let Dr. Dementia know that he should watch his back.”
“Would you like to talk to him? Or would you rather I took a message?”
“I’ll talk to him I think, yeah, taunt him.” The Chrisonator sounded as though he was pumping himself up.
“Ok, I’ll just put you on hold,” Dom pressed the hold button and wandered back towards the room that was currently inhabited by both doctors. “Doctor, there’s a call from the Chrisonator for you. He’s on line one.”
Dom was just about to turn before Dr. Dementia called, “Thanks, Dominic, I’ll take it from your phone if that’s OK. Well, it doesn’t matter if it isn’t, because I’m going to take it from your phone anyway.” He spun dramatically and waltzed out the room, leaving Dr. Gloom and Dom alone.
“Bright blue socks? Really?” Dr. Gloom smirked to himself while Dom tried to pull his pants down just far enough to cover the bright blue of his super suit.
“I like bright blue! It’s very… nice.”
“Dom, I know what you are.” Dr. Gloom looked serious.
“Good looking? Underpaid? Hungry?” Dom started frantically thinking of a way out of this situation.
“No, Dom. I know you’re, well, gay.”
“What?! I’m not, I’m not… gay.”
“Dom, there’s no use lying about it. Why else would you do everything Dr. Dementia tells you? It’s OK, though. I won’t tell him.” Dr. Gloom patted Dom on the shoulder just as Matt walked in.
“Well, I’m glad that’s over! The Chrisonator decided he needed to tell me to watch my back and then we started talking about pasta: he wants to know my recipe.”
“Did you give it to him?” Dr. Gloom took his hand off Dom’s shoulder.
“Yes, but, seeing as I am evil, I left out a key ingredient!”
“Very good, very evil.” Dr. Gloom nodded. Dom noted down the fact that Dr. Gloom was a massive kiss-ass.
“But what were you guys talking about while I was gone?” Dr. Dementia looked at Dom expectantly, bug-eyed.
“Apartheid…” Dom looked over at Dr. Gloom, who nodded.
“It’s wrong.”
“Oh… fair enough, then.”
♠ ♠ ♠
What Elcee said... except with me saying it.(: