Secrets

I was pretty much half asleep at the lunch table. None of the others had showed up yet – not even Ray, who I’ve just had algebra with.
I fold my arms on the table and lay my head on them. I try to close my eyes, but the noise of the other students in the cafeteria makes me feel almost seasick.
I look towards the open doors. Eventually the others will come through them.
I don’t even know why Ray’s taking so long. He said he just needed to put some books away. It doesn’t take…
I look at my watch.
7 minutes to put away a book.
Bob should be here soon. His English teacher always makes them stay late, but it’s been 8 minutes since the bell rang! She must be the devil!
Mikey and Frank just started high school a month ago. I’ll understand if they’re late. It’s a big school.
And when speaking of the sun, it shines.
Frank walks through the door. I don’t lift my head – at least not until I see the spring in his walk.
He humps through the doors – obviously trying not to put too much pressure on his right foot. He’s not wearing a cast or anything.
What happened?
He supports himself on the vacant table next to the one I’m at, before he limps the few feet and sits down across from me.

“Hi,” he says happily – as if nothing’s wrong.

“What happened?” I forget a friendly greeting and go straight to the inquisition.

“Nothing,” Frank says quickly, before he searches through his backpack for his lunch. He doesn’t even look me in the eye. I do see the small smile on his lips, though – fake.
I don’t know what to say – what to ask next – so I just stare at him as he unwraps his first sandwich and starts chewing away.
He doesn’t say anything either. He doesn’t even look up at me. Instead he looks out the window – looking at the students who’ve decided to get a suntan in the hot and sunny weather.
When he reaches up to push part of his fringe behind his ear, I see a giant gash on his arm. I grab it – his arm, that is.

“What’s this?” I twist his arm and pull his sleeve up further to see the cut better. It’s not too deep, but it’s still pretty brutal. Dried dots of blood follow the red cut that covers most of the underside of his forearm.
I look up at him. He looks in pain, so I release his arm. His face contorts in pain as he rubs shoulder.
“What happened to you?” He looks up at me – his upper lip pulled up into a snarl and his eyes beaming with anger. He wants me to back off, but I refuse. He’s my friend. I wanna help him.

“I told you; nothing.” He bites on the tip of his tongue when he extends it to say the last word precise and clearly.
I’m chocked by his hostility, but I won’t back down.

“It’s obviously something; whether someone hurt you or you did it yourself.” He raises his eyebrows and his eyes look surprised.

“You think I did this to myself?” He asks – disbelieving.

“No; so someone else must have,” I answer quickly. He rolls his eyes and scowl off to the side.
“Who was it?” I pressure. I’m not curious – I’m concerned.
“What; bullies? Drunks? The druggies at the park? Your-“ I stop myself. Accusing someone’s parents of hurting their kid is a pretty big deal. It’s not something you just fling out there.
Frank growls. He’s obviously pissed by my questions. Maybe he’ll crack in a bit.
He takes a big bite off his sandwich and munches on it as he glares up at me – his eyes filled with resentment.

“No. Now shut up!” He snarls through his clenched teeth – his mouth still filled with food.
I can’t shut up. I need to know what’s wrong. I need to help him. I care about him.
He’s my friend.

“Why won’t you just tell me?”

“Tell you what?” Mikey asks – sounding incredibly stupid and completely interrupting our conversation. Or, well; my inquisition.

“I was just about to tell Gerard that I’m leaving,” Frank says through his food-filled mouth, before he roughly grabs his backpack and limps out of the doors he just entered a few minutes ago.
Just as he walks out the doors, Ray walks in. He calls after Frank, but by the look on Ray’s face, Frank obviously doesn’t answer and just keep limping away.

“What did you say to him?” Mikey asks – sounding incredibly stupid. It’s a gift to him; I’m sure – a curse to me.

“What’s going on with Frank?” Ray asks when he’s close enough for us to hear.
I growl and lay my arms and head the way they were before Frank came limping in and ruined my perfectly okay day.
This time I persistently keep my eyes closed, despite the rocking feeling that makes my stomach churn.

“Did you guys see Frank?” Bob asks before I feel the bench give in when he sits next to me.
I growl inwardly.

-----

My parents have finally gone to bed. I’ve been sitting in my room for almost two hours warming up with my bottle of vodka and coke – mixed for a party last week that never happened.
I take one last swig of the bottle before I put it back behind the box in the cool corner of my closet. The corner is cool because of the crack in the wall from the heavy rainfall last year.
I pull on my jacket and open my small window to the outside world. I crawl up on various pieces of furniture – knocking just about everything to the floor – to crawl out of the small crack.
I dust off the dirt from the flower bed and walk around the house to the street. I leave my window open.
The cool night air makes my buzz a bit stronger, but it’s still nothing more than a buzz. My body feels light and free – nothing more.
I walk down the dark road of our suburban street. It’s a beautiful night. All dark. The air even seems clean – crispy. Jersey feels so much better at night – and when you’re slightly intoxicated.
Without noticing, I’m suddenly surrounded by heavy street lights and tall brick buildings. It makes me lose my feeling of joy and instead makes me bury my hands deep in my pockets – feeling cold and exposed.
The hair whips through my hair – ruffling it up – which screws up my view of where I’m going.
I blink – the deserted, grey street disappearing only for a split second – but when I open my eyes again I’m faced with a large, buff shadow.
I stop dead in my tracks and stare at the dark figure. My body sways slightly.
Suddenly the guy grabs my shoulder – his huge fingers digging into my muscle – and my legs turn to jelly. I fall onto my knees.
I feel something sharp, hard and cold against my jaw and I lift my head to stare at the guy. His teeth glisten in the street light.

“Give me all you’ve got or I’ll slit your throat,” he snarls – his voice rough and crackling. It makes me want to clear my throat.
But I’m frozen. My hands are free, but I can’t move them. I can’t tear my eyes off of the guy’s shining, chipped teeth – signaling numerous bar fights in the past.
He shakes me – pulling at my shoulder.
And then he’s gone. Then he’s off of me. So is the knife.
When my sight comes back into focus, I see the large guy on his knees – both of his arms twisted behind his back.
Behind him is a dark shadow – small, but masculine. This small figure is holding onto the guy’s wrists – twisting them across each other – while he’s got a foot on the guy’s back.
The smaller one looks young. He’s wearing all black. His hair is black too – falling down to one side of his black mask. His eyes look so young.
Suddenly the big guy gets hurled to the side and into a brick wall. He groans, before his body goes limp and he slides down into a black heap on the sidewalk.
My wide eyes catch the small guy’s.
Those eyes…
The small guy suddenly runs towards me – the three steps – and drops to his knees in front of me. He touches my neck and I wince.

“You’re bleeding.” His voice… It’s dark, but still so familiar.
From somewhere behind him he pulls out a white t-shirt. He rips it into shreds easily, before he takes a piece and presses it to my sore neck.
Even his hair looks familiar.
Suddenly his body is pulled back and the big guy immediately comes into view – his chipped teeth glistening.
He throws the small guy up against the brick wall – holding him by the neck with just one huge hand.
The small one grabs onto the hand – looking desperate. Yet, despite of his desperation, he has no problem in bringing the big guy down. Within one second the big guy has his face pressed against the brick wall. The small one’s got his mouth close to the guy’s ear. His lips move, but I can’t hear what he says.
Suddenly he lets go of the big guy – pushes him roughly against the wall – before he backs away. The big guy immediately pushes himself off of the wall and runs off down the street – turning a corner further ahead.
I’m still sitting on my knees – just staring at the scene before me.
The small guy is standing next to the – now broken – brick wall. He’s got his back to me. His fists are firmly places on his hips – his head held high. He’s wearing a tight, black outfit – no cape.

“Frank?” I whisper. The guy doesn’t move. Maybe it’s not him. But…
He suddenly turns around quickly and looks me straight in the eye. He’s scared.
“It is you.” Even from a distance, I recognize those eyes – the green spark in those hazel orbs.
His face falls – so does his head. His chin almost touches his chest as he slowly starts peeling off the black mask that’s hugging tightly onto his head – only his hair sticking out on top.
When the mask his hanging loosely from his hand, he slowly lifts his head. His skin looks paler and his eyes…sadder.
I’m too shocked to talk. I don’t even think that I’m breathing.
Am I even alive? Maybe the broad guy killed me and this is all a dream – a dream of a dead.

“I’m sorry,” Frank whispers quickly, before he puts on his mask again and turns around.
I shoot up from the ground so fast that I think I might have superpowers.

“Wait!” I grab onto his arm before he’s got a chance to run. Or fly?
Frank whips around. His mask is on his face perfectly – completely symmetrical.
I forget to speak. Again, I just stare.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, okay?” He sounds mad, or at least upset. Defensive, I guess.
“I’ve never wanted anyone to know. Hence the mask and the outfit, okay?” His questions are no questions at all. He pulls at his hair softly and looks bewilderedly around as he’s shifting constantly.
“This was my secret! It was meant to be a secret.” He sounds so sad.
“Please don’t tell anyone. Please?” His voice is begging – a small hint of anger and sadness still left in the softness of his voice.

“I won’t,” I whisper – somewhat out of breath.

“Good. Now let me go.” He pulls his arm back, but I don’t let go. From what I’ve just seen, he could easily rip my arm off if he pulled hard enough, but he doesn’t. He doesn’t even just pull out of my grasp.
“Gerard, please! I need to go!” His voice sounds shaky.
“I just told you my biggest secret! I need some time to think!” He pulls his arm back again. This time I can’t hold on.
He turns around and starts walking away – quickly.

“I’m in love with you!” Frank’s pace slows down, before he comes to a complete stop. And then he just stands there.
My breath is heavy – my chest falling and rising with such force that I’m afraid my t-shirt and jacket will rip. My heart is pounding – the blood rushing past my eardrums.
Slowly, Frank starts to turn around. When I meet his eyes, my breathing stops and my heart freezes. My mouth doesn’t, though.
“Now you know my biggest secret, so please don’t leave.” I feel a bubbling fear build in my chest, and with each passing quiet second, the fear rises up my throat. When it presses against the back of my tongue – making me slightly nauseas – he finally smiles.

That night, I learned how he got his bruises, cuts and injuries.
I learned his strengths – his small, yet powerful muscles and his quick movements.
And that night, I learned his only weakness – me.