No One Knows

On Sunday morning, Jessie broke Billie Joe's No Alarm Clock rule again. She wanted to get up early, partly because she still had a lot of stuff to take care of before they left, and partly because she wanted to be up and about before Ollie was.

It was one thing that Ollie knew they were together, but sleeping with Billie Joe when Ollie was just in the next room was something Jessie still wasn't entirely comfortable with, and she wasn't sure Ollie would be comfortable with it either.

"No complaining," Jessie smiled, rolling over so that she was leaning on top of Billie Joe, and kissing him on the lips, "You have a lot of packing to do."

He grumbled a little as he sleepily wrapped his arms around Jessie's waist and pulled her down against him. She grinned as she kissed his neck, before sliding out of his grasp and hopping out of bed onto the floor.

Billie Joe sighed, rolling onto his side and resting his head in his hand as he watched Jessie's naked form cross the room, a smile touching his lips as she pulled on a random selection of clothes from the ones strewn on the floor, including his jeans, which were a few inches too long for her and swished on the wooden floor as she walked.

"What?" she asked, noticing his smirk as she ran her fingers through her sleep-tangled hair.

The smirk turned into a broad smile.

"Nothing," he replied, "I was just thinking how fucking perfect you are."

Jessie giggled, flopping back onto the bed on top of him and bringing him into a kiss.

"You're such a cornball," she smiled against his lips.

"I made you guys some sandwiches for the trip," said Ollie, fussing around Jessie and Billie Joe as they ate breakfast in the kitchen, later that morning.
"Thanks," Jessie smiled.
"Mom," said Billie Joe, "We're only going as far as Oakland. It's like, an hour's drive from here."

Jessie nudged him with her foot under the table, as Ollie swiped him across the head on her way past.

"You'll miss me when you're gone, Billie Joe," she teased.
"Yeah... yeah..."

Jessie smiled because she knew that, underneath it all, he would miss Ollie just like she would. She'd never had anyone that cared enough when she went places to make her sandwiches for the trip.

Ollie smiled too, placing a hand on each of their shoulders.

"You look after Jessie on the road, alright Billie?"

Jessie smirked.

"Come on Ollie," she said, "You know as well as I do, that I'll be the one looking after him."

Ollie grinned, and Billie Joe looked indignant for a moment, before shrugging it off.

"You're probably right," he admitted.

Ollie sighed.

"I'm really going to miss the two of you around here," she said, wistfully.
"I know," said Billie Joe, "And we'll miss you. But don't start saying any goodbyes yet, because I haven't even finished packing."

Ollie smiled.

"What a surprise... are you ready Jess?"
"Packing... yeah," Jessie replied, looking down at her pancakes, "But I still have one more thing I need to do before we leave town..."

Billie Joe switched off the car engine, silent for a moment before he turned to look at Jessie, who was nervously chewing on her lip. He noticed her fingers shake a little, as she brought up her hand to push a stray lock of hair behind her ear.

Reaching out, he took her hand, bringing it up to his mouth and kissing her fingers.

"You okay?" he whispered.
"I don't know," she admitted.

He closed his eyes as he kissed her fingers again.

"Jess," he said, "You don't have to do this. You don't owe him nothing, okay?"

She raised her eyes to Billie Joe's.

"It's not about him," she said, "I owe it to myself. I want to look him in the eye, and know I don't have to be scared anymore."

Billie Joe nodded, before leaning over and hugging her tightly. Her chin came to rest on his shoulder as he stroked his hand up and own her back. He pressed a kiss into her hair.

"You want me to come with?" he asked, softly.

She shook her head, as she pulled away.

"I don't think that's a good idea," she said, "Just... wait here for me, okay?"

He nodded.

"Sure, no problem."
"Thanks..." she said, shakily, leaning back in to kiss him softly on the lips. He kissed her back, before she pulled back and pushed open the car door.
"Here goes nothing..." she muttered.

The guard at the desk wore a uniform similar to that of a police officer, and had an automatic gun tucked into his belt, which was just visible when he stood up to see Jessie approaching the window. She raised her voice a little when she spoke, so that it carried through the pane of bulletproof glass that separated them.

"I'm... I'm here to visit someone called John Perrone," she stammered, "He's currently awaiting trial."

The guard nodded.

"Okay, Miss. You realize there's only ten minutes of visiting time left?"
"I won't need any more than that."
"And your name is?"
"Jessica Perrone. I'm his daughter."

The guard nodded again, stepping out through the connecting door beside the window.

"Follow me," he said.

Jessie followed the guard into the next room, where he spoke to another guard, and she caught only her father's name and something about visitation rights, before she was instructed to wait, and then told to follow the guard again.

Her stomach was twisting and churning with anxiety as she followed him down a long grey corridor, illuminated by cold pools of overhead lighting. This did not feel like real life. She was shown into a long hall, filled with small tables. On the far side of the tables, sat prisoners in light blue uniforms. On the other side sat people who looked like they didn't belong here any more than she did.

Her heart stopped as her eyes settled on her father, with the same blank expression painted onto his face that was apparently as mandatory as the blue uniform, which he was turned out in the same as the others. She took a deep breath as he looked up, his eyes registering surprise, before it was masked by the blankness again. She sat down.

"Ten minutes," said the guard, as he walked off.

For a few long seconds, neither of them spoke. Jessie could feel her father's eyes roaming over her, but she kept her own eyes fixed on the Formica tabletop, and avoided his gaze.

"I didn't expect you to come," he said, eventually.

His voice sounded hoarse and scratchy.

"I didn't expect to either," Jessie replied, quietly, finally looking up, "But... I'm leaving for a couple months. I thought I'd just say bye."

"I'm surprised you want to say anything to me," he replied.
"And why's that?" she asked, bitterly.

John sighed, running a hand over his head.

"Because... I fucked up, Jessie."
"I know you did," she said, "And I wasn't going anywhere without hearing you admit it."

He nodded, and she watched him closely, amazed at how calm he was. It was as if his time in this place had sucked all the life out of him completely. Looking into his eyes, she could see the anger had gone, but she couldn't be pleased about it because everything else had been taken away with it too.

"You know why I had to call the cops. Right Dad?" she asked, quietly, "You know I was only giving you what you deserved."

He nodded, silently, sliding a hand up to cover his face as he rested his head in his hands, his elbow on the table.

"I know," he said.
"... I know I wasn't the perfect kid," Jessie continued, emotion rising in her chest, "But I wasn't a bad kid either. I wasn't bad enough to deserve what you put me through, I deserved more than that."

John nodded, without raising his head.

"And I deserved to know," Jessie continued, her voice cracking, "I deserved to know that my mother was dead. And don't feed me any bullshit about that being news to you, cause I can fucking tell that it isn't Dad! ... And how d'you think it felt when, after giving up on you being any sort of parent to me, I go to fucking social services in San Francisco to get told by a total stranger that my Mom's been killed a few months earlier!"

At this, John's face creased up, and he brought his other hand up to his face. Jessie felt tears welling up in her own eyes, but she forced them back.

"I know I should have told you," he choked out, "I just couldn't face it. I couldn't even face hearing it myself. I couldn't face dragging all those memories up again."
"Memories of what? Treating her like you treated me?"

John let out a silent sob into his hands.

"Look Dad," said Jessie, tearfully, her voice softening a little, "I'm going away, and you're staying here in jail... I don't know how long for, and maybe one day... maybe we'll be able to salvage something out of all of this. Maybe we'll get back some of the good times. But right now... I can barely even look at you."

John nodded, without raising his head.

"Where are you going?" he managed to ask.
"I'm leaving with Billie Joe," she replied, "His band got a recording contract, so I guess he wasn't a waste of space after all. They're touring the bay, and I'm going with him."
"He'd damn well better look after you," John muttered.

Jessie narrowed her eyes, leaning forward.

"I love him," she told him, slowly, "And he loves me. And he looks after me better than anyone else ever has."

Billie Joe had expected Jessie to leave the prison building in tears, or to burst into them the moment she got into the car, but she didn't. She was silent as she slid into the passenger seat and pulled the door shut, staring calmly out of the windscreen at the traffic passing them by.

He tentatively slid his arm over her shoulders.

"... How did it go?"

She turned to face him, then shrugged.

"I guess it couldn't have gone any better," she admitted, ruefully.

Parking up outside the house when they got back, Billie Joe took Jessie's arm as they headed up the driveway, turning her around and pulling her into a comforting hug. She smiled into him, breathing in the scent of his shirt and tightening her arms around his waist.

"Thank you," she whispered.

He smiled, and kissed her softly on the lips.

"Anytime."

Jessie and Billie Joe walked into the house to find Ollie sitting at the kitchen table, Eddie opposite her, talking their way through a pot of coffee, and looking up when the two teens entered the room.

"Hey," said Billie Joe, "What are you doing here?"
"Just came over to say hi... and bye," Eddie shrugged, "That okay?"
"Sure," Billie Joe replied, with a smile, "Thanks."

"How did it go, Honey?" Ollie asked Jessie, who was standing behind Billie Joe, holding his hand as she eyed Eddie with a hint of suspicion.
"It was okay," she said, "Strange. I mean... I said what I wanted to say, and he listened. He couldn't really do much else."
"Good for you, Jess," said Eddie, picking up his coffee cup, "You feel better for it?"

She looked down thoughtfully.

"Yeah... I think I do," she nodded.

Billie Joe slid his arm around her waist, pulling her towards him and kissing her cheek, and Ollie smiled, watching them, before they were startled by the sound of a horn outside.

"That's our ride," said Billie Joe, hurrying to the front door and pulling it open.

Tre was standing on the doorstep, a fresh green dye job in his hair and a grin plastered across his face.

"You guys ready?"
"I'm ready," Billie Joe grinned back, as Jessie came up behind him
"I'm ready too," she smiled.

"Okay, you guys make sure you take care of one another," smiled Ollie, pulling each of them in for a hug and a kiss as they carried their stuff towards the van.
"We will," Billie Joe promised.
"I'll keep 'em outta trouble, Mrs. A," Tre grinned, and Eddie laughed.
"Yeah, right," he said, "You're forgetting I was there to witness the state you were in on Friday night, Tre."

Tre laughed.

"I swear that was all Billie Joe's influence. Nobody was as bad as he was."

Billie Joe turned back to Ollie with a sheepish grin and she offered him a wry smile.

"I can tell you're gonna have a great time," she said, "I don't even want to know what you get up to. Make sure you eat properly though, okay? You can't just live on junk food for two months."

Billie Joe laughed, tossing their last bag into the back of the van.

"Wanna bet?" he grinned, as he climbed in after it.

Ollie looked tearful as they pulled away, and Jessie peered out of the small window in the back door of the van, watching the house get smaller as they pulled down the street, and smiling at the way Eddie's arms went around Ollie in comfort as they walked back into the house.

As Tre and Mike fiddled with the stereo in the front, finally letting the sound of the Clash fill the van as they sang along, Jessie looked over to Billie Joe, who was sitting in the corner surrounded by all the crap they were taking with them. He held out his arms, and she smiled and moved over to him, closing her eyes in contentment against his chest as he wrapped himself around her.

"Can you believe we're finally leaving?" Billie Joe smiled into her hair.
"No," she chuckled, "It's like we've been planning it so long I didn't imagine it would ever actually happen."
"Tell me about it," Billie Joe smiled, taking her hands as she raised her head to look at him.

He looked down, a thoughtful smile on his lips as he stroked her fingers in his.

"You know..." he began softly, "I've wanted to do this for such a long time, wanted to tour with the band. And I pictured it in my head like a million times, and it was always awesome. But I never pictured it like this. I never pictured I'd be sitting in the back of a van full of band equipment with my best friends, and this beautiful, amazing girl by my side."

Jessie smiled, looking down as she felt something flutter in her stomach. He squeezed her hand a little.

"I never would have thought that the way I imagined it could have gotten any better, but it has. I'm so... so fucking glad you're here, Jessie."

Jessie grinned, looking back up at him as she took his face in her hands.

"You have no idea how happy I am right now," she grinned, touching her forehead against his.
"I think I do," he smirked.

She giggled.

"I love your smirk," she said, rubbing her nose against his, "... I love you."

He smiled, happily, sliding his arms around her waist.

"I love you too," he said, softly, as their lips met.

Jessie's arms went around his neck as she pulled him in closer, their kiss breaking as they went over a bump in the road, making them giggle as their mouths connected again. Jessie slid her fingers into Billie Joe's hair as their kisses deepened, before they were interrupted by a yell from the front.

"For fuck's sake!"

Mike.

"We've just fucking left your fucking house!" he complained, "If this is a sign of things to come I'm throwing one of you out onto the street right now. Jeez! Get a fucking room!"

They laughed, as they dragged their attention from one another and turned to face him.

"Sorry," smiled Billie Joe, holding up his hands in surrender, "We'll behave."

Jessie grinned as Tre and Mike went back to their singing and she turned back to Billie Joe.

"So you think this is it, then?" she asked, raising an eyebrow as she fiddled with his collar, "This is your first step towards your big rock and roll life?"

Billie Joe grinned, his green eyes shining.

"Let's hope so," he said.
"You'd better promise not to forget me when you get all famous, you know."

He laughed, kissing her nose.

"I promise," he smiled, "If you promise to look after me when it all takes its toll and bits of me stop working at, like, forty... "

Jessie laughed.

"I promise," she said.
"Anyway," said Billie Joe, with a lop-sided smile, "We'd better not jinx it. Who knows what will happen? This might end up being something we do on the side... and I guess I could cope. As long as we're still playing music, I'll be okay."

Jessie looked at him sceptically.

"Even if you have to work a nine-to-five office job by day and wear a tie and stuff?"

Billie Joe smiled, kissing her again.

"Come on Jess," he said, "That's never gonna happen. I promise you that..."

"Oh, you promise?" she teased.

"Yeah... listen..." he smiled, "You'll never see me wearing a tie."