Will You Catch Me If I Fall?

Addison POV.

I sat in the bedroom, my bedroom...our bedroom. There was the low humming sound of a stereo beat coming from the other rooms outside and the sound of flowing conversation, the chinking of beer bottles and some guys hollering loudly. I laughed to myself. This is was my home warming party. Our home warming party. As of now, I was home, with Trace. I still couldn’t believe it.

I knew I was slightly drunk, though I had promised Trace I was cutting down on my alcohol consumption. He was fine with me drinking tonight, and if he wasn’t fuck him, our house warming party....I have a reason to celebrate and who’s saying I’m getting trashed. I’m pleasantly....tipsy, yeah that’s the word.

I wobbled in my high heels over to the picture of me and Trace. I looked down at the moment frozen in time. I smiled and traced my finger over Trace’s hidden face. Me and You forever, that’s what he whispered when we made love for the first time in our brand new apartment. We were starting a new life, I was clean, and I was happy. No more drugs, or over drinking. No more cutting, no more hating myself. Because of Trace. He had saved me in so many ways. And the only thing I could really give back to him was my love. What could I give to a boy that had handed me so much? Just me...and for Trace that seemed enough.

I wanted to stay with him forever, I wanted to see myself walking down an aisle towards him...hell, I could see myself being the mother of his bloody children, and I’m not exactly maternal. But for Trace, I’d want a little part of him like that...

A shout of laughter from outside jolted me to my senses and I laughed ar myself. Lovesick...completely and utterly lovesick. Who would have thought Addison Grey could ever actually love someone the way I love Trace now...not me, not Frank-E...

Where is Frank-E? I suddenly realised that the only person missing from our party was the closest friend I had. I frowned, finding my phone and dialling his number. He answered on the fifth ring, and his voice was choked and hoarse. He was drunk.

“Frank-E, babe, what’s wrong?” I asked immediately...

Frank-E sniffed through the phone ad struggled for a moment as of trying to find the energy or will to speak to me. “It’s today Addison...today, was the day....the day they took her.”

I cursed at myself. Of course. His baby girl, Nicole who had died of meningitis and her death causing the breakdown of his relationship with her mother. The reason we had first connected, and still connected...pain over the loss of a loved one.

“Do you want me to come over babe?” I asked him quietly, all the time making soothing noises with my mouth.

“No,” he muttered, “I’m...I’m ok, I just need some time alone. Maybe later, check on me or something, enjoy your party Sunshine.”

I knew I would check on him later, the way I used to stumble to his on Stephanie’s death anniversary. It was like...a secret pact. At some point in those days, we’d find each other, console each other. We had been waiting for the day till we both really had had enough of everything...we had wanted to die together....but that day was no longer going to come for me...because I had Trace. But I still worried; I worried about Frank-E.

I said goodbye, hanging up and then looked at myself in the mirror in the bedroom. I ran my hands over my flat stomach, my average sized breasts. The lace of the black dress that hung lower the black slip underneath clung to my legs seductively and moved with my skin when I walked. My hair hung long and straight as always, my eyes coated with large amount of mascara, making my green eyes stand out from everything. Unlike a year ago, where men used to find me an easy lay because I was dead inside, my eyes dull and tired of life...they were on fire. I was burning from the inside in the most delightful manner and even my worry and pity for Frank-E couldn’t quench it. The fire was excitement, excitement for the future.

I walked out of my bedroom, leaving my phone on the dresser. I smiled at several people, giving Ant a squeeze around his waist as he chatted up a neighbour. There were catcalls from the living room, and I looked around to the couch where Sim, Mason, Trace and Kelsey were all sitting playing Call of Duty. I rolled my eyes at them, laughing as Trace killed Mason on screen and Mason yelled out in disappointment. Kelsey screeched in laughter, throwing her curly hair back and clapping her hands. Her pearly white teeth stood out against her Californian tan, and her shiny red dress pushed her boobs out a bit too much for my liking, she looked beautiful. So far she had been a good neighbour and I couldn’t complain about her. She stopped by often to chat to us, and though her giggly, girly laughter could pull on the strings of my temper, I put up with her and I liked her.

I moved on into the kitchen, not really noticing Kelsey rubbing Trace’s arm like he was a dog but Simara raised her eyebrows at me, and made a face. I shrugged, Trace loved me, and he wanted no-one else. He was far too interested in a video game anyway to notice Kelsey...but just to mark my territory, I went over and sat on his lap. Kelsey moved away from us, and Trace smiled drunkenly, and tossed the control at Kelsey. It hit her in the forehead, but he didn’t hear her exclamation of pain. I laughed inside.

“There’s my beautiful girl, come here,” and he kissed me deeply. I snickered at him, kissing him back, and then pushing him away. She got the message. I walked away, doing the rounds of conversation with everyone. Finally, near half two in the morning, the party finally ended. I had sobered up, and I decided to check on Frank-E. I walked past Trace and Kelsey who were still on the couch, and I yawned, “Babe, I have to go check on Frank-E, I’ll explain in a minute.” Silently wishing for Kelsey to just leave.

I walked into the bedroom to grab a pair of flats, pushing them on, and I wandered lazily back into the living room...and stopped, horrified at what I saw...everything I had come to believe in crashing down at once.

Kelsey lay practically on top of Trace, her lips locked ferociously with his. She made a moan of contentment and I let out a strangled gasp. Trace pushed Kelsey off of him, looking her in the eye and then he seemed to notice me standing there, looking at my boyfriend make out with another girl like a fucking idiot.

“Addie, no, she kissed me...I, I didn’t do anything, I swear!” he scrambled off the couch, stumbling towards me. I was such an idiot; I should have seen the signs. She’s wanted him all along; maybe they’ve been doing this behind my back ever since we officially moved in, maybe even before that!

Crack

The sound of the palm of my hand smacking Trace across the face seemed louder than normal in the quiet room. I looked past his shocked face at Kelsey who was staring at me, scared but when I looked at her, the fight left me. She wasn’t broken like me, or fucked up...she was beautiful, and normal...he deserved someone like her. I was finished, I was finished with everything.

Tears filled my eyes and I couldn’t help but allow them to spill down my cheeks. Trace made a noise, “please baby, listen to me.”

“Get away from me,” I yelled, “All this time...I’ve believed in you, I let you make me feel...and now you’ve done this? Well don’t worry about me anymore...I’m gone!”

Before he could take another step, I launched out the door, running down the stairs faster than I’ve ever ran before. I needed everything to go away now, for this unbearable pain...worse than anything before to go away. I needed Frank-E. Tonight, we needed each other.

I ran and ran to Frank-E’s and as soon as he opened the door, he knew what I was going to say. His own face was blotched from tears, his own heart screamed for mercy. I looked at him, a chill deathlike look in my eyes now, that fire was gone. Trace and Kelsey had thrown water over it.

“Tonight Frank-E,” I whispered and he caught my hands in his, a grim determination in his eyes, “tonight we’ll finally end all of this.”