It's Not A Love Song

After ‘eating’ Olivia’s version of a meal, Olivia and Joe disappear so Nick took me on the two hour long drive to the graveyard that held my father’s body. I was even more sad because this was usually Joe’s job.

Nick stayed in the car while I carried a bunch of flowers to his grave. Once I’d done that I headed back to the car, I didn’t want to sit and talk to a gravestone, plus being in a graveyard wasn’t very pleasant. They’re peaceful but I just don’t like the idea of death.

I climbed into the passenger’s seat after wiping away a few tears. I fastened my seat belt and relaxed into the seat. “You okay?” Nick asked touching my arm.

I nodded, “I’m fine.”

We sat in silence for a while. I don’t think Nick could find the words to say anything, or he didn’t know what to say. “How come your mom doesn’t come?”

“She doesn’t want to be reminded of him. And he said in his will that he wants her to be happy, coming here doesn’t make her happy.” I explained pushing all my hair through my fingers. I then tied it back into a messy bun.

Nick started up his Mustang and turned down the music. “You know, Joe just needs to find balance between you and Olivia. He will eventually, just give him time to adjust.”

I laughed without humour and turned to gaze out of the window.

Balance. Joe definitely needed that. It may not have been long but I could definitely see the difference. But he didn’t seem to be changing or trying to find balance, he just seemed to be ditching me and spending all his time with Olivia. I never thought he would leave me, I never imagined spending this day of all days with Nick and not Joe.

Nick managed to keep up conversation the whole way home, two hours of laughing and smiling with him had brightened my day completely.

“Let’s go to Pinkberry.” Nick suggested as we reached the house.

I nodded happily, “I’ll go see if anyone else wants to come.”

I quickly ran into the house and into the living room where Kevin, Danielle, Joe and Olivia sat watching music channels together. “Hey!” Danielle said excitedly jumping up and hugging me.

“Hey!” I replied with a smile, “Nick and I are going to Pinkberry, wanna come?”

“Yeah, come on Kevin.” Danielle smiled patting his shoulder.

I always knew they’d get engaged but they were in no rush to get married, but right now all I could do was ogle at Danielle’s ring. They walked out the room to Nick’s car leaving me in the room with the happy couple.

I cracked my fingers then asked, “So are you coming with us?”

Joe looked to Olivia and I cringed. Since when did he need someone’s permission to come to Pinkberry with us?

They interacted through their eyes for a few minutes but I knew he wasn’t coming, they made no attempt to move. “I think we’re just going to chill here.” Joe said.

I shrugged, “Ok.”

On the car ride to Pinkberry I rode shotgun and sung along to the radio with Danielle while Kevin and Nick laughed at us. Nothing out of the ordinary.

But, when we arrived to Pinkberry we were paparazzi-ed like no other. It was funny to me but everyone just walked in dead seriously like they had nothing in the world to smile about. I chuckled as we stepped inside and patted Nick’s shoulder.

“What do you want?” Nick asked me as we stared up at the menu while Danielle and Kevin ordered straight away.

I tapped my chin and pondered it. “Original with strawberries, banana, fruit pebbles and… mango.” I told Nick with a smile.

“Okay…” Nick smiled back at me then pulled out his wallet.

“Thanks.”

While we all sat and ate our Pinkberry it still felt wrong and unbalanced. So, before we left the yoghurt joint I got Joe his favourite; original with banana, strawberries and fruit pebbles. I paid for it my self and attempted to keep it cool in the car. I was determined to get Joe back on my side.

I carried the treat to where Joe was; the garden. “Joseph.” I called.

He lay on a sun lounger with Olivia next to him, their hands interlinked. “You brought me Pinkberry?” He said gleefully.

“I could see you wanted one, so I got you one.” I handed it to him, feeling quite smug as I looked to Olivia, “Enjoy.”

I didn’t see Joe the rest of that day or the whole of the next week, he’d gone over Olivia’s for the night and apparently during the day. I was definitely trying my hardest to keep Joe as a friend but it seemed he had no interest in hanging out with me anymore. I spent a lot of my time with my mom and his other brothers who hadn’t lost interest in my conversation or being around me thankfully.

I packed all of my gear into a suitcase ready to go on tour the night before we left, I needed something to fill in a night so I decided the last night before tour would be the best time to do it. I didn’t pack too much knowing that I’d buy things along the way and need space in my suitcase to bring them back.

We had to be awake at one in the morning to get on the bus to travel to L.A where, from there, we’d travel east across the whole of North America. My alarm clock yelled at me to get up at quarter to one, I turned it off then rolled out of bed placing my feet on the floor.

I pulled on some white basket ball shorts and a grey hoodie then pulled up the hood. I grabbed my pillow and tied some plimsolls onto my feet. Groggily I wandered downstairs and out the front door where everyone gathered outside the tour bus, putting in suitcases and talking amongst each other.

My tired eyes landed on Joe who had his arm around someone. Olivia. “What the…” I whispered to myself rubbing my eyes.

“Morning Julia.” Olivia said in a patronising tone, she leaned up to kiss Joe’s unshaven cheek with a grin.

I leaned over to Kevin, “What the hell is she doing here?” I whispered laying my head on his shoulder.

“She’s coming for the first two weeks.” Kevin whispered.

“Mavellous.” I sighed, rolling my eyes.

Everyone filed into the bus, I was last on, too tired to push my way through people. I squeezed past the adults to my bunk. I ripped open the curtain and screamed.

Olivia lay in my bunk, watching TV. “What are you doing in my bunk?” I shouted dropping my pillow to the floor.

“This is your bunk?” She sounded completely oblivious.

A voice from above me decided to make its self known. “Julia, just find a different bunk.” Joe sighed rubbing his eyes.

I decided, for the sake of any friendship Joe and I had left, to leave my bunk and go into the empty one opposite Joe’s. I threw my pillow in and climbed inside the too high bunk, soon after I got into my new bunk I stared at the roof of it unsatisfied and annoyed.

Now she was invading my space. She wasn’t even supposed to be on this tour, she was supposed to be cheating on Joe somewhere so he could realise what a twat she really is. She had done nothing to make me like her and everything to make me hate her. She tried to feed me haggis! That’s enough for me.

The next morning everyone was awake before me and the bus wasn’t moving; we’d arrived in L.A. I tugged open the curtain and looked around, everyone seemed to be in the front of the bus, on the floor sat my suitcase.

I swung my legs over the side and jumped down, avoiding my case. I hauled the case up into my bunk then wandered out into living area.

“Moring Edward Scissorhands.” Nick smirked. I resisted flipping him off and sat down next to him on the sofa.

I looked to Kevin who handed me a cup of coffee. I looked to him hopefully, willing him to stick up for me. “Don’t blame me, I cannot control the idiots that are my brothers.”

I smiled as Nick kicked Kevin in the back of his legs making him crumple to the floor, but he caught himself on the kitchen counter. “Poned!” Joe exclaimed leaning forward to bump his fist against Nick’s.

Denise leaned against the counter looking at the screen of her blackberry with a grin. “What’s made you so happy?” My mom asked drying her hands.

“Linda is pregnant, that’s four of our friends now.” Denise smiled widely and looked to her children.

My mom was smiling also, “There must be something in the water.”

“Well unless it’s sperm, it doesn’t really matter does it?” Nick said, his wit shining through.

I laughed loudly along with everyone else while Frankie sat clueless with his cereal. “I don’t even wanna know.” He mumbled to himself and swallowed some juice.

I ruffled his hair with a smile, then leaned around his shoulder and stole his cereal.