It's Not A Love Song

Since sitting down at the table I had ordered pasta, flirted with a waiter, got the waiters number and set up a date with said waiter. But once the food was on the table it was family time.

Nick sat opposite me and Kevin was to my left with Frankie to my right. To the right of Nick was Olivia and then Joe was next to her. Nick was kicking my feet and legs constantly under the table, so I’d kick him back, scrunching up my face in the hope it would make me kick harder. It didn’t.

Then, Nick took it a step further and threw some potato at my face. I gasped and looked to Kevin who shook his head and refused to help me. I picked off a bit of my pasta and launched it at Nick, but he ducked sending it to the floor.

Nick kept staring at the floor, he looked scared. Then I heard it, the ear piercing shriek of Olivia Young.

“What?” Joe exclaimed.

Her shaking hands brought up her handbag to the table, on the cream skin of it I could see an orange stain. I looked to my pasta dish, the sauce was orange. My pasta had bounced off her bag. Lucky much?

She grabbed a napkin and began to dab it. “It’s stained!” She said in despair. She looked to me and my pasta as I put some in my mouth. “You did it on purpose!”

“No I didn’t, I just have a bad aim. I wanted to hit Nick.” I explained eating some more pasta.

My mom glared at me, “Julia will pay for it. How much?”

“Ten thousand dollars.”

I stared at her in disbelief. Who buys a handbag for ten thousand dollars?

“Anyone who owns a ten thousand dollar purse deserves to have pasta thrown at it.” I snapped causing Nick and Kevin to laugh under their breaths. But Joe was still livid.

“I’ll buy you a new handbag.” Joe said to her, kissing her cheek.

I really hoped he wasn’t serious, like he had ten thousand dollars to blow on a handbag. The old Joe would have laughed with me and agreed that she should never have bought it in the first place. But Joe had ‘grown up’.

My pasta throwing apparently put a downer on the dinner, but Nick and I were still cracking on. The adults were talking amongst themselves and so were Frankie and Kevin. Olivia and Joe were in their own little world while Nick and I were in ours. It was like them and us and I didn’t want it to be like that.

For the next two weeks of tour Joe and I didn’t talk much, though we said we would. He went back to acknowledging me but spending all his time with Olivia. I had developed a relationship with the waiter, Leon, we talked on the phone, texted, iChatted and flew out to see each other almost every couple of days.

Then I hit the jackpot.

“Julia, I talked to Paul and Denise and they have agreed to let Leon come on the tours with us.”

So, Olivia left tour and Leon came. I was very excited to have him on tour, it would be nice to spend some time together and get to know each other. I mean he didn’t even know my middle name yet, time needed to be spent. The more I got to know him the more I fell in love with him. Our relationship seemed to be perfect, there were no scratches or bumps, just a smooth ride so far.

It felt like a completely different relationship to the one that I had with Nathan. This one was more realistic, more serious and deep. We understood each other, we needed each other.

I was ill in the tour bus, I didn’t want to endure watching the Jonas Brothers perform tonight so I lay in my bunk stuffy nosed watching Hannah Montana. I heard the tour bus door slam open then closed and someone storm towards my bunk. My curtain was whisked back to reveal and very fretted Leon.

“Why didn’t you answer your cell?” He asked quickly.

I turned off the TV and faced him, “I don’t know where I put it.”

Leon sighed angrily, “You could have been hurt and I wouldn’t have known.” He said running a hand through his short black hair.

“Well, I’m fine no need to go in a stress.” I smiled reassuringly at him.

“It’s your fault I’m like this.”

I frowned, feeling guilty. I should have had my phone, it wasn’t fair to make him stress out like this. I climbed out of the bunk and wrapped my arms around his torso. “I’m sorry, it’s my fault.”

He didn’t answer but just hugged me. “Come on ill child, let’s have a cuddle.”

I smiled at our reconciliation and let him climb up into the bunk first then I followed him inside and into his arms. He kissed my forehead and rubbed my arm, calming me down and calming himself down. He was always nicer when he had something else to focus on.

“Julia, would you be mad at me if I told you that I didn’t like Joe?” Leon mumbled against my hair.

I sighed. I’d always knew they wouldn’t like each other, but it was okay, Joe didn’t think about my feelings when he started dating Olivia so it’s time for me to put my own feelings and wants before his. I was comfortable in this relationship and this is what I wanted to focus on; Leon.

“No, it doesn’t matter.” I smiled up at him and kissed his nose, “He doesn’t matter when it comes to us.”

“Good.” Leon grinned and kissed my lips. “You’re going to get me ill.”

I shrugged and snuggled closer to feeling needed and wanted.

The next morning we woke up in the same bunk, they were playing two shows in the same venue so the bus hadn’t moved either. I climbed out of the bunk and went out into the living room, everyone was still asleep including Leon. After sitting and watching a few minutes of Oprah talk about teen dating abuse Joe wandered to the front of the bus, still looking tired.

“Morning.” I said to him, switching the channel over.

He gave me a smile then began to pour himself some orange juice. Once he had a glass he sat down next to me and watched the news channel with me. I waited for him to tell me to turn it over, he hated the news channels, but he didn’t.

“Julia, I just want to say something.” I turned to look at Joe, giving him my full attention. “I want you to be careful with Leon, something about him creeps me out. Just promise me you’ll tell me if something happens?”

I could see the worry plainly written across his face. His forehead creased and worry lines around his eyes executing the purple bags proving his restless night’s sleep to the world. His mouth in a straight, hard line. He needed reassurance.

“I promise.” I said, trying to sound as convincing as possible.

He still looked worried and unconvinced. But he accepted my word and wandered to the back lounge. I sighed and rubbed my tired eyes.

Leon had woken up now and was stood in front of me, scaring me. “Bloody hell.” I whispered putting my hand to my heart.

“What was he talking about?” Leon laughed and sat down next to me.

I leaned against him and then rested my head on his lap, he gently stroked my hair and facial features relaxing me. “He just needed to know I’m okay.”

Leon frowned. “Why wouldn’t you be?” I shrugged, not knowing the answer. “I thought we agreed he wouldn’t get involved with us?”

“I know.” I mumbled, closing my eyes.

I hoped and prayed for a peaceful day between us, not drama or anything. Just enjoying being with each other because right now I wasn’t enjoying it. Too much was running through my mind. It hurt my head.