My Girl

We all sat around my kitchen table silently. We as in Joe, Steph, Nick, me, and my mom. My mom, since she was trying to eat healthier, had a green apple and a protein bar out in front of her. As for the rest of us, we were sitting around a pepperoni pizza Joe and Steph had brought over.

I didn’t know exactly where Joe and Steph had gone after Nick and I left for the hospital. But by the way they didn’t completely ignore each other from across the table, I had figured they got some time to talk.

“So…Elise.” My mom glanced up at me through her glasses. “How did you meet Nick and Joe?” I had told her on the way home about Arielle, Parker, and Steph. Parker and Arielle were still at their dad’s business thing.

“Golf.” I said through a bite of pizza. My mom’s eyebrows raised and she nodded her head.

“Were you on Elise’s team?” She turned her attention to Nick and Joe now.

“Um…” Nick swallowed and shook his head. “Green Oaks, actually. Green Oaks’ team.”

By the way he repeated himself, I could tell he was nervous. Intimidated. Something. I don’t know, he had seemed somewhat indifferent once we got to my house.

My mom knew of the rivalry, but she didn’t make it obvious at the table. She glanced at me and then nodded her head subtly, looking back down at the paper that was in her hand. It was a booklet about Diabetes.

“Nick has diabetes, mom.” I said suddenly, hearing Joe cough awkwardly. Nick didn’t seem fazed, he just nodded his head and leaned back in his chair.

“Type One.” He added in. We sat around silently as my mom nodded her head.

“That’s interesting.” She seemed bitter, but the doctor told us to expect that. “Do you guys have plans for the night? Is Sylvia going to join you, Elise?”

I glared at my mom and stood up from the table. Nick gave me a warning look as I put my pizza back down on my plate.

“No.” I mumbled, wiping my hands on my napkin. “Sylvia is not joining us. She never will. We can do stuff without her, Mom.”

“Elise…” Nick said quietly, reaching out for my hand. I moved it as his fingers brushed across my skin.

“Don’t use that tone of voice with me.” My mom warned, looking over at the rest of the table.

“Don’t just expect for Sylvia to come everywhere with me. We aren’t friends anymore.” I said, crossing my arms over my chest.

“Seriously?” My mom’s eyes widened and she pulled her glasses up to the top of her head.

I rolled my eyes and glanced at Nick, Joe, and Steph. “I’m sorry guys.”

“…and yes. Seriously.” I said to my mom, scooting my chair into the table before quickly walking up the stairs to my bedroom.

/>>/

“Where did Joe and Steph go?” I asked as soon as Nick walked up into my room a few minutes later.

“They went back to my house-”

“God.” I threw my head into my pillow. “They’re going to think I’m some freak.”

“No they aren’t.” Nick sat down next to me and rested his hand on my lower back. “They will understand things are tough right now.”

I glanced up at Nick and felt my stomach flip. “I don’t want them to understand.”

“What?” I couldn’t see Nick’s face, but I could tell he was confused.

“I’m tired of people saying they understand what is happening. And I’m tired of making excuses for me. I’m tired of you making excuses for me.” I sat up from where I was and turned to Nick.

“Elise…” Nick stared down at my hands that were in between the two of us and flipped his hair out of his eyes. “…before you say anything.”

“What?” I asked, tilting my head slightly. Nick inhaled deeply and puffed his cheeks out, letting the air escape through his clenched teeth.

“Someone called Joe earlier today. From…Disney.” He said quietly. I looked at him and smiled slightly.

“Disney as in…the kid’s show?” His eyebrows clenched together slowly and he challenged my stare.

“Yes.” He looked like he wanted to say more, but he kept it at that.

“Okay.” I shrugged my shoulders and looked around my room. “I don’t see what your trying to get at.”

“They want us to audition…they said they could get us a record deal.” He continued to look down at his hands. The teasing smile on my face faded.

“Why are you upset about this?” My stomach flipped, as I got the idea of what was coming next.

“They want us there by next week. If things work out, we might end up living there.” I shook my head and felt tears on the rim of my eyes.

“Nick…no. B-but…no.” My voice cracked as he looked apologetically up into my eyes.

“We might not even make it.” Nick said quietly, reaching out for my hands. I stood up from my bed and started to pace around the room.

“Anyone who has ever heard your brothers and you perform would be crazy not to take you.” I stated. He stayed silent, probably realizing I was right.

“I don’t know what to say.” he said quietly, standing up from my bed.

“Tell me your joking.” I said, feeling the tears swell in my eyes. My vision blurred and I quickly wiped my eyes. “Tell me that you can stay with me. You can’t leave, Nick.”

“I don’t know if I have to.” He mumbled, staring down at the floor. “You know I don’t want to.”

I looked up at him and nodded my head. “Okay.”

“Okay?” His eyes met with mine. I nodded again.

“Okay.”

“So…your cool with it?” His face lightened, but seemed to fall at the same time. I shrugged my shoulders.

“It’s your dream, I’m not going to stop you.” I had isolated myself so easily. My tears stopped, my face eased, I couldn’t let myself get anymore emotionally attached to him than I already had.

“I want to stay with you again.” Nick said quietly, sounding so innocent it made my heart hurt, the wall I had put up so easily started to waver.

“I don’t know if that’s a good idea.” I mumbled, walking to my dresser. Nick’s sweatshirt he wore last night was draped on the front of it. It smelled so much like him, I had a hard time handing it over to him when I made my way back to him. “Joe probably cant cover for you again.”

“I will call him. I can ask.” He pulled out his phone and showed it to me.

“Nick, you stayed last night. My mom doesn’t even know about that. She just found out that you’re my boyfriend, sleeping over probably isn’t the best plan.” I walked out of my room and pulled my hair away from my face, messily sliding it through the hair tie that came from my wrist. I slid some shoes on and watched as Nick did the same. “I will go out with you to your car.”

Nick looked at me incredulously. “How can you let me just walk out like this?”

“It’s what I have to do.” I crossed my arms over my chest. He walked toward me and out the door. Rain started pouring slightly, soaking through his shirt. Weird how every time he seemed to leave, it was raining.

“Your letting me walk out. What if I don’t see you? Ever again, this could be the last time you see me, Elise.” He flicked his hair out of his eyes and held his hands out. “The last thing you say to me, it could happen right now.”

I walked further outside of my house and stared up at the gray sky. I glanced back down at Nick, knowing he couldn’t see my tears through the rain, and shrugged my shoulders.

“Anything. Do you have to say…anything?”

“Nick, what do you want me to say?” I said, throwing my arms down at my side. “Of course I don’t want you to leave me, you have to. You said it yourself. You could end up living on the other side of the country, and I’m not going to let myself grow so attached that it kills me even more when you leave.” I didn’t hide my emotions now, loosing my breath as I felt the sobs escape through my throat. I swallowed and started to turn away.

“Elise…wait.” His voice was almost unheard through the rain, coming off as a whisper.

“No.” I walked up my porch steps, reaching out for my door. I turned around and watched as his eyes searched my face. Searching, trying to find any sign that I was just joking around right now. The same thing I was searching for in his eyes.

I cleared my throat and twisted the doorknob slightly. “Nick, I know I love you.”

I bit my lower lip and glanced behind me, seeing him stop in the middle of the walk up to my door. Ignoring the softened look on his face, I continued to open the door and slammed it loudly behind me.

Letting my tears pour, I leaned onto the front door to keep me from falling down. I slid down the surface until I felt my bottom hit the floor and I was sitting in front of the doorway.

If those were the last things I said to him, Nick I know I love you, at least I would live the rest of my life here, knowing he finally knew it.