For Better or for Worse

KYO’S POV:

“Ari, get your damn cat off me.” I growl as the furball crawls everywhere.

“Come on Tobi, Daddy doesn’t want to play.” She pouts picking him up. I only grunt making myself comfortable on the couch. “Hey Kyo?”

“Hm?”

“Are you in a bad mood?” She arranges herself next to me, her tiny face inches from mine.

“No.” I lie. Truthfully, I don’t even know what’s up. I just feel like something’s missing suddenly. I don’t feel like myself.

‘Bitches love me 'cause they know that I can rock, bitches love me 'cause they know that I can rhyme, bitches love me 'cause they know that I can fuck, bitches love me 'cause they know that I'm on time! Throughout the projects!’

“Kyo, your phone is ringing.” Ari alerts me, monotone.

“I know.”

“Maybe you should answer it?”

“Maybe.”

“Hello?”

“Dammit Ari don’t answer my phone!” I sigh. This woman.

“…He’s what?!” Her eyes grow wide as she bolts to her feet, cat falling off her lap. It’s a cold day in hell when that cat’s feet touch the floor.

“Something wrong?” She only shushes me raising a finger and fluttering about the room. “Ari!”

“We’ve gotta get to the hospital Kyo.” She exhales hurriedly, pulling on her coat and rushing out the door. Without a second thought, I follow sticking close to her side. “It’s Die.” She whispers. “He won’t wake up. He’s in a coma.” Oh god.

XOXOXOX

“Aie? Aie are you okay?!” Ari rushes, quickly beside her friend. The tiny girl sits hunched in the corner, her face hidden beneath layers of unruly hair. Her fragile shoulders shake violently as sobs can be heard coming from her. Blood stains her fingers and clothing. His blood I’m willing to bet. “Aie?” Ari whimpers. I bite my lip, turning away from the sorry sight and moving to the front desk.

“Excuse me? But is there and Andou Daisuke here?” I hesitate, praying to god this is just some sick joke. The woman turns to me, taking in what I’m sure is not a happy face. She flips through some charts before making eye contact yet again.

“Yes, but he has not been assigned a room. Most likely they have him in Operating.”
“Operating?” I stutter. “What happened?”

“I’m sorry, I can’t share that information. Immediate family only.”

“…I’m his brother.” She eyes me warily, but responds.

“There was a high speed collision with a drunk driver apparently. He is suffering from severe head and internal trauma. Currently, Mr. Andou needs to be stabilized before anyone can visit. Even then, the chances that he will be conscious are slim. I’m very sorry…” Her gentle eyes convey that sorrow, and I bow thanking the woman.

“Umm…do you have anywhere we can take her?” I whisper gesturing to the cowering Aie, “…I think she could stand for a change of clothes and I doubt she’ll be leaving…I think she might be scaring some others too.” The woman sets her eyes on Aie before nodding.

“If you’d like, I can bring her to the nurse’s lounge. I’m sure they wouldn’t mind…It’s a bit more comfortable in there.”

“Thank you.” I smile bowing yet again. The woman returns the gesture before stepping out from behind the stand and moving to Aie. Quietly, the three of us retire to the designated room. Aie stands nervously in the corner clutching her large stomach as a nurse hands me a pair of scrubs, pointing out the nearest bathroom for Aie. “Hey Ari, can you help Aie? Here’s something clean for her to change into.” I whisper handing over the clothing. She nods, disappearing, and I fall into an empty couch, tuning out the hum of the television until it’s only static. I let the noise take over, eventually letting it drag me into deep sleep. The added warmth of Ari and Aie does little to ease the turmoil inside.

XOXOXOX

AIE’S POV:

“Ma’am? You’re here with the guitarist, no?” A nurse whispers to me as I lay on the couch staring at the empty walls. Slowly, I nod turning toward her. “He’s stable now and has been placed in a room if you would like to come see him.” Standing, I try my best to smile but can’t bring myself to do so.

“Please?” I whisper, my voice hoarse in my throat. It sounds so foreign to me. She turns leading me from the dimly lit, silent room, leading me through the hallways. Eventually we stop.

“I’m not really supposed to let you in after visitation hours, but I’d want to be with him too if I were in your shoes.” She smiles sadly, stepping aside and allowing me access.

“Thank you.” I choke seeing the sight of him wrapped in layers of gauze and attached to machine after machine.

“He looks a lot worse than he actually is. Don’t worry. Most of that is to prevent infection. I’ll give you about 15 minutes.” I nod again, quickly moving to his side, unconsciously taking his hand.

“Die…” I whimper, tears streaming down my face as I smile out of relief. He’s alive. Barely, but he’s here. His bruised face looks calm and serene as his chest rises and falls gently. “You better be okay because you didn’t tell me goodbye. And if you can’t hear me say it, then I’ll be a liar Die. I don’t like being a liar.” I chuckle softly to myself. It’s not as if he can hear me, but I want that laughter of his to reach my ears again. I want to see that million watt smile and those youthful eyes. I want to wake up in his arms again, his callused fingers stroking my skin. I don’t think he knows he does that, but I want that. I need him. “I love you.” I cry fighting my buckling knees. His eyes flutter slightly, but maybe that was only my imagination playing cruel tricks. “Goodnight Die.” I whimper hesitantly pressing my lips to his dry ones. Blood still lies caked to his skin, and I wish they would have the common courtesy of cleaning him. “You could use a bath.” I chuckle slipping out of the room and returning to Ari and Kyo, neither of them having moved an inch. Slowly, I return to the couch slipping into some much needed sleep. Images of the two of us play through my head. It will be okay…

XOXOXOX

Two Months Later

XOXOXOX

It’s been two months. Nothing has changed. Die won’t wake up. Kanon doesn’t call. Ari and Kyo keep to themselves, and the others never associated much with me anyhow. The only difference is this stomach of mine ready to burst. Good lord it seems like I’ve been pregnant for years! I just want her out of me!!! I’ve had my baby shower which could have gone better if it weren’t for the pissed off parent factor. I’m pretty much disowned. Ari tried to help, but she’s not much better. She and Kyo must be a bit closer than friends because Mother Nature has been skipping out on her for two weeks now, if you know what I mean. So, things have changed for others, but it’s relatively the same for me. My life has been rather stagnant without him.

‘Kill the voice, close your eyes, drown in the darkness, roam around. I won't depend on anyone anymore. Kill the voice, close your eyes, drown in the darkness, roam around. I keep inside me your keen voice...All in darkness.’ My phone sings, waiting for me to answer it. It hasn’t wrung in two months it seems.

“…Hello?” I answer.

“Aie! Hurry up and get over here!” Ari’s voice blurts.

“Where?”

“The hospital! And hurry!” And with that, the call ended. Without a second thought, I vault out the door forgetting everything but the clothes on my back and keys. What’s wrong?

“Andou Daisuke?!” I gasp to the nurses I’ve come to know and love as I clutch my knees, fighting to breathe. I almost don’t catch the smile on their faces.

“Go ahead Aie.”

“Thank you!” I move down the corridors, eventually finding his room. I think I’ve spent more time here than anywhere else. So of course I’m the one who misses something big. There everyone is. Well, Ari and Kyo at least. Everyone else is outside the room. Only two at a time. Fuck that rule. Bursting into the room, I stare slack jawed at the sight before me. “Die? …You’re awake?” Again, my voice betrays me as the tears well up. Unused muscles in my face fight to stretch and contort into a smile.

“Who are you?” He blinks before returning his gaze back to Kyo and Ari. “Kyo? Do you know her? Should I get the nurse?” That smile quickly fades as I step out of the room.

“Sorry. Wrong room.” I giggle, fighting the tears threatening to escape as I bolt. The queasy feeling in my stomach starts acting up again, as well as sharp pains. But I push past them, eager to get to my destination. Anywhere.

“Aie?!” I hear the distant shouts of Ari and some of the nurses, but I don’t care. He doesn’t even know who I am anymore, and that hurts more than anything. Turning a corner, I catch my foot off a nearby chair and fall to the floor in agony. My stomach screams from the impact, and blood boils beneath my skin as tears rip free. I lay in the hallway, unable and unwilling to move. What’s the point in it? “I found her Kyo!” Ari’s voice cries out. “…Call a nurse! Quick! …She’s bleeding.” She whispers beside me, her fingers hovering about my limp body. “Aie, talk to me. Are you okay?” She sounds pained. Slowly, I turn my face to hers.
“Would you be?” I choke. Ari only shakes her head, her eyes skimming down my contorted body before meeting my gaze again.

“Aie, you’re going to have to be okay. I think the baby’s coming…”

“…Will you call him?” I respond hesitantly. Ari bites her lip, nodding reluctantly. “Thank you.” I smile sadly as my stomach contracts, screams ripping out of my throat. I scream in pain. In rejection. In hope.