Moving On Up

“It’s over between me and Mark.”

He continued to stare intently down at her, his mouth open slightly. Charlene sat up and gently pushed him down into a sitting position on the couch before snuggling into his side.

“Nicky.” She said quietly, pressing her nose gently into his cheek.

“Charlene; I need to know that this is what you really want. I don’t want you ending things with Mark and life as you knew it if you are not 100% sure this is the right thing to do.”

“Why are you always so hesitant? Is it not enough for me to simply want to be with you?” She frowned, scrunching my nose in confusion.

“No, that’s not enough. Your happiness comes before mine and I just want you to be happy, regardless of who it is with. You are all I will ever want; all I have ever wanted...but I don’t want you if I know you’d be happier with someone else because at the end of the day, it is your happiness that matters most to me. I’ve caused you so much pain in the past and I have to be sure that you honestly want me again.”

“Nick.” She pressed a kiss to his neck and turned his head to look down at her, seeing the intensity in his eyes. “We had our ups and downs during high school and yes you hurt me like no else ever has...but those times we spent together;” She sniffled and wiped under her eyes; “they were the happiest of my life. No one has ever made me feel like you did; like I was the only person in the entire world that mattered, that I was more important than the air you breathe. Nick, every relationship has its dark sides but they’re worth it if it means I get you. Since we ended things years ago, I have found myself comparing every little thing my boyfriends did compared to you. I’ve tried so hard to convince myself that you are more harm than good but I can’t lie to myself anymore. My hearts been put through enough torment and it just wants to love you freely once again. I don’t know what I can do to make you believe that you are the key to my happiness, that you are my hearts only desire. Nick, just tell me what I have to do and I’ll do it.”

He trickled his fingers down Charlene’s cheeks but his face was still stern. Charlene knew he only wanted what was best for her, but she needed him to realise that it was him; he was what was best for her.

“Tell me you love me.”

“Nick, I’ve told you that a million times in the last hour.”

“I know, but I just need to see something.”

She squinted in confusion and wondered what on earth he was going on about. Charlene saw him staring intently into her dark eyes and then twigged. He knew that her eyes could never lie.

“Nicholas Jonas.” Smiling softly, she held his face in her warm palms and brushed her lips over his. “I love you and I want to be with you. I don’t want to be with anyone but you because this thing between us is too strong to fight or ignore and I’m sick of running. I love you and I want to spend my life proving this to you with everything in me.”

Charlene continued to rub my thumbs over his cheeks, anticipating his response; the silence killing her. He gently pulled her hands from his cheeks and held them to his lips.

“I will never do anything to hurt you again Charlene. I was young and foolish when I made the biggest mistake of my life in high school. I need you in my life and I will do everything I can to make you happy because you are all that matters to me.” Slowly he leant forward and brushed his lips against his love’s, dropping her hands to cup her face with his own. “I love you so much.”

“I love you too.”

He nudged her nose with his and she giggled softly and pressed a delicate kiss to his lips. “So are you ready to give this a shot for the...3rd time.” He chuckled.

“3 has always been my lucky number.” She laughed quietly again. “Regardless of what happens, we always come back to each other and I have never known fate to be so obvious.”

Nick grinned and kissed Charlene’s nose before moving his face lower and rubbing his nose over hers once more. “I’ve missed all of your fate mumbo jumbo.”

Charlene scoffed and pulled her head back from his, playfully slapping his shoulder. “It is not mumbo jumbo! Nick, I pity your inability to appreciate the art that is fate and the forces which-”

He groaned and crashed his lips onto hers, sending Charlene backwards with him on top. “You’ve been hanging around those Oxford brainiacs too much. You need to lower your IQ just slightly and by spending every day and night with me, I’m sure that will happen.” He grinned and pressed kisses all over the face of a grinning Charlene.

“Nick, don’t put yourself down so much!” She laughed and squealed when he started tickling my sides. He laughed as he continued to torment her with his tickling which he knew she had always been weak to. It was moments like this that they had both missed and both were so thankful to have finally gotten each other back. Content happiness finally seemed achievable.

...

Nick pulled up to Mark’s house; the place Charlene had grown to call home, but now fear pulled at her stomach as she stared at the beautiful house. His car was parked in the driveway so they knew he was home. Charlene knew she would have to face him sometime, she just never wanted to face reality. She had been in hiding at Nick’s house for 3 days and could have happily hidden there for the rest of her life if it wasn’t for Nick’s encouragement that she finally gain the courage to face Matk.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to come in with you?” Nick asked, running his fingers through her soft hair, smiling at the fact that her hair was still as soft as it had always been.

“Yeah. He at least deserves to speak to me one on one.”

“Ok, well I’m going to go and grab a coffee from the coffee shop down the street and be back here in a little bit. Is that alright?”

She turned her head to look at his sympathy filled eyes and nodded, smiling extremely weakly. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” He whispered and pressed a kiss to her forehead, not wanting to leave her. She pulled back from him and opened the door, closing it carefully behind me. He had tried to reach for her, to tell her she didn’t have to do this alone but she had been too quick for him.

Walking around the car carefully, the butterflies began to erupt in Charlene’ stomach so much so that she felt slightly sick. Letting out a deep breath, she walked up the footpath and turned back to see Nick staring at her. She could not read his face or thoughts and before she could think anymore of it, he turned his head, put the car into drive and pulled into the street.

Bringing the key up to the lock, she slowly unlocked the door and walked warily inside, shutting it almost silently behind her. Thankfully she was wearing flats so she didn’t make loads of sudden noise.

Suddenly there was a loud barking and Charlene turned to see Lola come flying around the corner and start jumping at her legs. Lola was like a child to Charlene and it broke her heart knowing she would have to leave the dog. She bent down and picked her up, smiling as she licked over her entire face and howled softly. It felt nice knowing Lola had missed her. Charlene doubted Lola’s daddy would be as affectionate.

“Hey Lola.” She whispered, rubbing her tiny head and grinning as she panted and bounced in her arms.

“Lola, who’s at the-”

Charlene turned her head slowly to see Mark stop dead in his tracks, his mouth open slightly. The atmosphere was strained and cold, neither of them knowing what to say. She half expected him to welcome her back since he was oblivious to the fact that she had been here already for a few days. But she knew Mark. He wasn’t stupid and he knew her far too well.

“Hi Mark.” She whispered, not being able to look into his eyes. “How have you been?”

“Fine.” He spoke quickly and coldly, his eyes cutting. Dropping the eye contact, Charlene placed all of her attention on the tiny dog in her arms who seemed to cherish being in Charlene’s arms.

“So, what did you think of Nick’s new apartment?” Mark asked. Her head shot up to see him holding a newspaper with her and Nick on the front. Her heart stopped.

There in front of her was a huge image of her and Nick at the airport, his lips pressed against her forehead. Although Nick was in disguise, he was still recognisable. He was Nick Jonas, football legend for goodness sake. There was a further picture below of Nick’s arms around Charlene as they left the airport, sending Charlene’s heart plummeting even further.

“Funny, this newspaper is 3 days old.” Mark said coldly, his words cutting and pained.

Charlene stuttered and tripped over all of my words, knowing he had caught her out. She felt foolish and embarrassed. She felt like a bitch.

“Classy; real classy.” He spat. “You honestly thought I wouldn’t find out?” He walked towards her and took Lola from her arms, a whimper leaving the dogs lips as she was placed on the ground. “What the hell did I ever do to deserve this? Huh, Charlene? What did I do?”

“Nothing. You’ve done absolutely nothing wrong.” Her hushed and croaky voice was weak and vulnerable compared to his. He took a step closer and she flinched. Mark’s heart broke at her reaction. She thought he was going to hurt her and this devastated him more than anything.

He brought his hand up to her cheek delicately, smoothing his thumb slowly down her soft skin, their sad eyes locking as his eyebrows knotted together.

“Then why have you broken my heart? Why have you done the ultimate damage you can do to someone?”

“Because I’m lost and confused.” He cupped her other cheek with his hand, his palms warm and inviting. His eyes were pouring into hers, the sadness and devastation written all over his face. “I’m stupid, I’m selfish, I’m a slut, I’m-”

Charlene was stopped dead in her tracks when Mark pressed his finger to her lips to shush her. Her eyes were wide open as she stared up at him, wondering how he could be so calm suddenly. He’d always been like that. Nick had a very short fuse but Mark was one of the most patient and calm people she had ever known.

“You’re none of those things.” He whispered, stroking her face, his features tight in thought.

“I’m so sorry.” She sobbed, allowing him to hold her close to his large and warm chest. “I’m so so sorry.” She cried into him, shaking violently.

He rubbed her back but the love and warmth was no longer present in his touch. Mark slowly pulled his head back from hers and stared down into the eyes of the only woman he had ever loved. The woman that was killing him. Slowly he turned and walked towards the stairs, leaving Charlene to watch his back as he left. She remained in the same position for only a short time before following him towards the bedroom, knowing she would probably never be in this house again. The house she absolutely adored.

He held the door open for her and she brought her hand up to her mouth when she saw all of her suitcases lined up. The bedroom looked so empty.

Charlene looked over at him and had never seen him so torn and heartbroken. “Where have half of your things gone?” She asked, noticing many pictures that were no longer on the walls.

“You loved so many things in this house that I just thought they belonged with you more than me. I washed all of your clothes as well and bubble wrapped fragile things like all of your ornaments. I know you’d probably like Lola packed as well but she’ll be staying here.” He smiled weakly but there was no happiness in his facial expression. Only devastation.

“Mark; do you hate me?”

He watched her quietly and then slowly pushed himself off of the wall and gathered her into his arms. “I could never hate you. I love you so much which is why I am letting you go. Ever since Nick arrived you haven’t looked at me the same way.”

“That’s not true.”

“Yes it is. Even before I knew about the past you two shared, I detected a change in you. You always looked like your mind was elsewhere. I knew you felt something for Nick because whenever he entered the room you would clam up and huddle close to me as if for protection. When I learnt about you and Nick...it all made sense. And when you left 2 weeks ago; I knew I’d lost you forever.”

She cried and pulled his forehead down to hers, feeling like the biggest bitch ever. “How did you know?”

“Because I know you.” He trickled his fingers softly along Charlene’s jaw and then lifted his hand up to stroke her soft hair. “At first I was so angry, not at you, at Nick. I was jealous of the power he has over you despite how much pain he caused you in the past. At first, I wanted to hate him. It seemed like he had seen his opportunity to get close to you and seized it, determined to win you back. I never understood why he would do such a thing that he knew would cause such drama when he always seemed like a reserved and polite guy. But for him to have such determination and drive when I knew the personal issues he was going through, it made me realise how much he truly loved you. The way he spoke about you...I’ve never seen someone so love sick.”

1 week earlier

The usually warm and lively house was dead and silent after Charlene’s departure. Nick had been sitting on the window seat for hours in silence, with tears pouring continuously down his grief stricken face. Mark had been lying on his and Charlene’s bed for hours, staring at the picture of him and Charlene in his shaking hands.

Two broken hearts striving for the same thing; Charlene.

By midnight neither had moved from their broken states. Two strong and confident men destroyed. Mark moved from his bed and stared at his reflection in the mirror, not recognising the person staring back. He managed to tear himself away and throw on a hoody before making his way to Nick’s room. Without knocking, he opened the door and looked at Nick huddled up by the window, looking just as bad.

“Dining room, 5 minutes.” Mark said, his voice void of emotion, and closed the door before making his way downstairs to make some coffee and toast. He flicked on the kettle and pressed his elbows onto the counter, leaning his head on his hands and sighing deeply, wondering how everything had gone so wrong so quickly.

Nick wiped his eyes violently as he gazed at his reflection, seeing the mess that he had become. He gripped Charlene’s dog tag tightly in his hand and pressed a long kiss to it, wanting her more than anything in his entire life. She was all he needed; his soulmate. He would never want another woman.

He sighed weakly and trudged out of the room and down the stairs, heading for the dining room. Mark was sitting at the head of the table with two mugs of coffee and fresh toast with spreads and jams sitting beside it.

He looked up and then looked down at his coffee that he was stirring. “I didn’t know what kind of spread if any you would want on your toast at this time.” Nick wondered how the hell Mark could always control his emotions so well. If the roles were reversed, Nick would have killed Mark yet Mark was so polite. It confused the hell out of Nick that Mark could maintain such composure.

“I’ll have peanut butter and jelly.”

Mark chuckled slightly. “So american.” He smiled weakly, again confusing Nick at his manners. Mark pushed a mug of coffee towards Nick as Nick took the seat 2 down from Mark. “Don’t worry it’s not poisoned.” Mark said as he brought his own mug up to his lips.

“Mark, why are you being so polite to me? Shouldn’t you be beating the shit out of me right now?”

Mark placed his mug down and crossed his arms over his broad chest, staring at Nick who took the same position. “Because I know how easy it is to fall for Charlene. I don’t blame you for being in love with her. I don’t agree with the way that you’ve gone about getting her again but-”

“What do you mean?” Nick frowned.

Mark laughed coldly and shook his head. “Nick, you knew what you were doing so don’t deny it. You came here with one intention and one intention only; to win Charlene back. I honestly don’t know how you were able to look me in the eyes every day like you did. If I were you...I would be too ashamed.”

Nick tried to interrupt but Mark held up his hand and for some reason this silenced Nick, who had grown to very much respect Mark. “Like I said, I understand why you did what you did. I understand the sickening pull on your stomach, the heavy heart and the blood pumping through your vain’s at the mere thought of Charlene. All I am saying, is I think that you went about it the wrong way. You knew how much damage your presence would cause her yet you came anyway. And you knew that I would be hurt by this as well. What you did was so selfish and I need to know why you were so determined to get her; regardless of the destruction you knew you would cause.”

Nick let out a deep breath and gazed out of the large window to the pitch black garden, his hands cupping the warm mug. A picture of Charlene caught his eye, she was cuddled on the couch with Lola in her arms who was licking her face and Charlene had a huge smile on her face, her eyes crinkled in laughter. She was beautiful. He hadn’t seen that smile in a long time.

“I love her. That is the only reason I have for my actions which were extremely selfish but I never realised how much until now. I always believed that I was what was best for her, but Mark, I’ll be honest with you...I never realised how strong you two were. I never knew how deeply you cared for one another. I didn’t think she would be so hurt but I was stupid in thinking she may want me as much as I want her. I never knew how much you loved her but upon seeing you two together; you’re perfect. I guess I was and am still so bitter. She is the only woman I have ever or will ever love.

“If I can’t have Charlene then I have accepted that I will always be alone. I was angry because you could never love her like I do, but you had and still do have her. I was bitter and selfish and I cannot apologise enough for the despicable actions I have taken and the pain it has caused you both.

“But Mark; I do not regret getting close to her again. She is the only good thing in my life; the only bright light and just by living in the same house as her I feel better then I have in years. But what hurts so much is knowing the damage I have caused you. You are one of the most honest and trustworthy people I have ever met and being in such a vain and arrogant line of work, people like you are rare to come across. When I first met you and Charlene again in New York, I didn’t know what to do. If I can’t be with Charlene, then it is you I would want her to be with just because of the person you are. But I also realised that someone like you has almost no faults...especially compared to me, and I knew that it was next to impossible that I could ever win her back. Why would she choose someone as fucked up as me, over someone like you?”

Nick kept his head low, his hands clasped tightly together as he burnt a hole through the table with his hot and heavy gaze. Mark stared at the broken man in front of him. The man who was always so withheld and strong. The man that seemed capable of everything and really did have everything a man could want...except on thing. The one thing Mark had that he didn’t; Charlene.

“Love.” Mark spoke through a ragged breath and breathed deeply through his nose. Nick raised his head slightly and looked at Mark with confusion, his eyebrows raised. “She cannot control who she loves. I’ll be honest with you Nick, I don’t think you’re good for her. She hates things being out of her own control and from what she’s told me...life with you was never easy. You don’t fit the ideals that her family aspire of her. Heck, I think even she wishes she didn’t love you sometimes because of all the pain it brings.”

Nick hung his head once more and clenched his jaw, knowing that Mark was only speaking the truth. He jumped slightly when he felt Mark’s hand on his. “But Nick regardless of all that...she loves you. You can’t control who you fall for and she loves you. No matter how much you question why she loves you, it will never change anything because she does and you should accept and embrace that, rather than forever deem yourself unworthy.”

Nick sat back and Mark removed his hand and went back to crossing his arms over his large and firm chest.

“Why? Why are you telling me all this?” Nick whispered.

“Because I pity you.”

Nick too crossed his arms over his chest and stared at Mark, both men doing nothing but looking at each other, judging each other silently.

“I pity the fact that you are so love sick that you are blind to the destruction you have caused.”

“Mark, I-”

“Don’t interrupt me.” Mark spoke lowly, a warning in his voice and eyes. Nick understood when to shut up. “You love her and she loves you. That is all you are seeing Nick. I hate to break it to you, but she also loves me and I love her so much it hurts. But you don’t see that or at least you do but don’t give a fuck!”

Nick watched as Mark slowly lost his composure; the calm English etiquette collapsing as the raw emotions came to the surface.

“I let you stay in my bloody house and the whole time you are gunning for my soon to be fiancée!”

Nick’s eyes widened.

“Yes! Fiancée! I have had the ring for months but have been waiting for the right time. But there is no right time with you around! You love her, we’ve established that, but what about me huh? What about goddamn fucking me?!”

“I’ve told you I’m sorry, Mark!” Nick yelled back, the veins in his neck bulging. Manners aside, composure aside, emotions front and centre. Nick was surprised that he found it easier when Mark was like this, rather than wondering what was going on behind his calm and cool exterior.

“But you’re not, Nick! You have screwed up my entire life and frankly, I don’t think you care! You’ve got what you wanted, you’ve hurt Charlene again and that seems to be the only thing you are capable of! You seem to think that because of your bloody personal issues that she should stop everything she’s doing to comfort you. Nick, we all have problems but we don’t use them to twist and manipulate people. I lost all but one of my siblings in a car accident a few years back and Charlene has been the only person in my entire life that can relate to that. She is my support system and I need her just as much as you do!”

“No you don’t!” Nick stood and pushed his chair back, staring down at Mark who quickly stood as well, refusing to be intimidated. “If Charlene were to leave you, there is no doubt in my mind that you would find someone else. Sure, it would take time but you would recover. I can’t recover from Charlene. She has had the biggest impact on me and my life that I cannot even describe it. She transformed me into a better person.”

“If you were the ‘better person’ you wouldn’t have cheated on her whilst you still held her heart.” Mark growled. “You had her and you abused the luxury. She deserves to be loved and cared for in a way that you can never provide.”

“That’s not true.” Nick snarled, glaring at Mark with cold yet burning eyes.

“Isn’t it?” Mark raised an eyebrow and tightened his jaw and fist, staring at the man he had once considered one of his closest friends. He was now the man that had ruined his life. “You have one week. One week to find yourself somewhere to stay. You’ve long overstayed your welcome.” And with that Mark left the dining room, tension and anger filling the air.

Nick placed his hands on the table and looked down, closing his eyes to catch and calm his breath. He then noticed that his hands were shaking and he struggled to control them. Hearing Mark’s car rev up and pull out onto the street, Nick pushed himself off the table and headed upstairs to pack his bags. His invitation at the Taylor household had long passed its expiry date.

...

Mark pressed his forehead to Charlene’s and they stared into each others eyes, a longing passing between them.

“I love you so much Charlene.” He whispered, pressing his lips softly to hers. She opened her eyes when he pulled back and continued to stare up at him. Mark pressed a further kiss to Charlene’s lips, this time a little harder and more passionate. Once again he pulled back to look into her eyes before ducking for a final time and pressing his lips firmly onto hers. She hesitated against his actions but then collapsed into his chest, kissing him back just as strongly. The kiss quickly turned into something resembling a carnal feeding, their hands all over each other and their mouths moving aggressively together.

They blocked out everything around them but both heard a truck pull up beside the house, yet neither thought anything of it. Mark wrapped his arms around Charlene’s waist and nudged her in the direction of the bed.

“Let me make love to you.” Mark whispered, pressing a kiss to her ear. Charlene suddenly froze and turned slowly to look at Mark who had tears falling down his cheeks quickly.

Charlene let out a sob and pushed from his embrace, shaking her head as she covered her mouth with her shaking hand. “No no no.” She said quietly through her cries.

He reached for her but she moved further back and panic began to set in. “Charlene don’t do this. Please. I am begging you; don’t do this.”

“I love him.”

“He doesn’t deserve you!” Charlene was taken back by Mark’s outburst and it pained her to see how distraught and devastated he was.

“And I don’t deserve you. Mark, you deserve a woman who is as amazing as you are.”

“You.” He stepped forward and gathered her hands in his. “You are all I want Charlene. I don’t want anyone or anything but you. I will treat you like the princess that you are. I would never ever hurt you-”

“But you are.” She looked into his face and pushed back the pain in her throat. “You are hurting me by not letting me go. It is not fair that I be with you if my heart is not 100% committed to you. You deserve better.”

Mark dropped my hands and turned his head, his eyes suddenly cold and bitter. I followed his gaze and saw Nick’s car parked outside. It had been his car that had pulled up mid kiss.

“He doesn’t deserve you.” Mark whispered, a tear falling off his chin and onto the floor. Slowly he returned his gaze to hers and shook his head, not believing she was doing this. “I thought you loved me.”

“I do. Don’t ever doubt my love for you.” She cupped his face and stroked a hand through his hair, closing her eyes as he clung to her.

“Then why can’t we be together?” He whispered and she wiped the tears falling down his face.

“Because you’re not my Nicky.” She said quietly, her throat raw and raspy. “I love you so much Mark, I really do. But you’re not my Nicky and that is the only reason I have.”

“Then go.” His voice was like velvet and calmed her emotions. He had regained his composure. He had put on his strong front once more. The front that tried to hide the pain inside. The front that didn’t fool Charlene.

He dropped his arms from her waist and slowly removed her hands from his hair and face. They stared at each other saying nothing as tears streamed down their faces; no sound in the entire house. She watched as he bent down and pressed a long kiss to her forehead, shaking slightly as he did so.

Turning, he lifted two large suitcases of hers and left the room, leaving her to pick up two more. By the time she reached the bottom of the stairs Mark was already on his way back upstairs to retrieve her other bags.

A quiet whimpering brought Charlene’s attention to Lola who was huddled against the corner of the door to the kitchen. Charlene would miss her dearly.

“Come here Lola.” Charlene whispered as the small dog moved swiftly towards her. Charlene scooped her up and held her tightly, sniffling quietly. Lola continued to whimper and nuzzle her face into Charlene’s neck, her soft and tiny head tickling Charlene’s chin.

“I love you little lady.” She said in a hushed voice, jumping slightly when she heard Mark’s voice behind her.

“She loves you too.” He whispered, setting her final bags on the ground. Charlene set Lola on the ground and turned to hug Mark but he stepped back, breaking her heart further.

“Don’t make this harder than it needs to be.” He said.

She whimpered and turned her back to him, lifting two of her bags and taking steady breaths.

“Goodby-”

“Don’t.” Mark interrupted, his breathing heavy from behind her. “Don’t say it...just don’t.” His voice broke and she hung her head, holding onto her bags tightly, knowing that if she looked back at him she wouldn’t be able to make herself leave. She didn’t expect him to carry her bags out to Nick. It would be rubbing salt in the wounds. Upon hearing him leave the room and head upstairs, Charlene opened the door and was greeted with heavy rain.

She heard Mark lock his bedroom door and a sob crept up her throat and her shaking returned. Nick climbed out of the car with an umbrella at the ready as he quickly walked up the path. He stared at her but she avoided his gaze. He handed her the umbrella but she walked past him to the car, not caring about how drenched she was getting. Setting the bags in the boot of his car, Nick ordered she stayed inside of the car and get warm whilst he got all of her other bags.

Her eyes caught Mark’s as Nick ran back and forth for her bags. Mark was standing by his window staring down at her before he shut the curtains and vanished from sight. Charlene turned her head down to her hands and shortly after was joined by a soaking wet Nick.

He flicked the heaters on full and gazed over at Charlene. He had been waiting for this moment for years; to finally have her back. But she sat there refusing to look at him and it hurt him more than words could ever explain.

“I’ve hurt him so much.”

Her voice was barely audible and he was surprised she had even spoken. He continued to look at her and he warily placed his hand on her knee, half expecting her to push it away but instead she grasped it tightly with both hands, slowly turning her head towards his.

“I never wanted to hurt him.” She sobbed, her uncontrollable shaking scaring him shitless. “I never wanted to hurt him.” She cried louder, her bloodshot eyes grabbing his attention. He pulled her to him, holding her so tightly he feared she would break. She held onto his shirt and cried into his neck, her shaking still continuing.

Guilt hit Nick square in the chest, a pain so unbearable and surreal. Not only had his actions hurt Mark, but they’d hurt Charlene as well. Would all of this pain be worth it to her? Was he really worth what she was sacrificing?

She pulled her head back slightly and gazed up into Nick’s eyes, leaning into his touch as he smoothed his palm over her cheek. “Are you still sure this is what you want?”

She frowned at his question, wondering if now he was backing out. If after all of the pain he was going to break her heart...again. “Is this what you want?”

He picked up on the tone of her voice, the fear and weakness behind it. But there was also an element of challenge.

“I want you.” He picked up her hands and held them to his lips, smothering them with kisses. “But only if this is what you truly want.”

Without hesitation she nodded and he dropped her hands to hold onto her face and run his thumbs down her cheeks as she spoke. “Yes. Yes, this is all I’ve ever wanted since I was seventeen years old. You. You are all I want Nick. I don’t give a damn about any of the baggage or drama our reunion will probably have around us. It’s all worth it if I get to have you and call you mine again.”

Pressing his forehead to hers, he spoke softly yet his simple words were so passion filled they blew her away. “I love you Charlene. God, I love you so much.” She didn’t think she’d ever heard anyone speak with such passion and love in her entire life.

She smiled yet kept her eyes closed and brushed her nose over his; a wide smile forming on his face. “I love you too Nicky.”

“We’re gonna be okay. Charlene, I promise you, everything will be okay.”

She pressed her lips softly to his, relishing in the feeling. Nothing compared to her kisses with Nick. There had always been something about him that had drawn her in and made her feel like she never could with anyone else. He was it for her.

“I believe you, Nick.” Running her hand through his curls, she smiled weakly and pressed a further kiss to his soft lips. The lips of her one true love. “I believe you.”