What's This Feeling?

“I’ll have the French vanilla coffee, he’ll have the regular coffee.” I said to the waiter when he came by for our orders.

“Do they already put the sugar in?” Ryuuga asked.

“No, we put in the sugar, and use their milk here, and the cream there.” I said pointing to the milk, cream and sugar.

“…Why do you think me or Light-Onii-chan is ‘Kira’?” I asked.

“One of our inspectors had been investigating you two, a few weeks later, from when he was spying on you, now he’s dead. I’m thinking one of you killed him, because one or both of you are ‘Kira’.” Ryuuga said.

“…the only time I noticed I was being followed, was when I was at the supermarket, and when I was walking home from cram school.” I said, “ And I didn’t know what his name was, all I saw of him was a light brown trench coat and a dark blue hat in a car, that he always drove away in.”

“Here’s your coffee.” The waiter said when he came out with our coffees.
“Thanks.” I said.

I handed The coffee over to Ryuuga.

Ryuuga started putting sugars in… he put, 8, 9, 10, no 11... He put in 15 sugar cubes. Wow, I haven’t put that many since I was a kid! Well, I do put lots of sugar in, just not that many. I put maybe 5 or 4.

“…You want some coffee with your sugar there?” I said and started laughing, I wasn’t making fun of him, it’s just funny to see an adult putting loads of sugars in his coffee.

“…What do you think of ‘Kira’?” Ryuuga asked.

“It’s funny, Light already asked me this question before…Well I think ‘Kira’ is, a fool trying to be ‘God’. He isn’t good, I don’t see him as good. He’s just killing people, even if they are criminals. It’s still a life. I think he is doing some good, by killing criminals less and less murders and thefts are happening. I’m not saying I’m on his side though, I really wish he would be caught soon. ‘Kira’ may be killing people who feel really bad and regret what they’ve done… They deserve a second chance, that’s why we have prisons.” I said.

“What do you think of ‘Kira’?” I asked.
“’Kira’ needs to be caught, He’s just a mask murderer. Not a god, he’s definitely not good, he’s evil.” Ryuuga said.

“I’m betting that you told my brother you were ‘L’. You told him, you told me as well because you think we or one of us is ‘Kira’. I’m a lot smarter than I seem…” I said, taking a sip of my French vanilla coffee.

“Oh really, What else do you think that I’m planning to do?” Ryuuga asked intrigued.

“I think… maybe you…could be planning to be our friend so that if he was ‘Kira’, which he’s not! That maybe you’d get close to him, and he’d tell you how he kills… I think, or you would be testing him, to see if he did, maybe even the slightest suspicious moves… I think.” I said. Re-thinking what I just said.

‘I don’t know how to feel at all in this moment, happy, sad, upset or maybe embarrassed… I really am glad that I met ‘L’. That I’m here with ‘L’. I’m sad or upset because he suspects that me and or my brother Light could be the mask murderer, ‘Kira’. I’m embarrassed, because… I think he was the one who put cameras in our house… So he saw… I won’t even finished my sentence.’ I thought.

“Hmm, you sure have an interesting assumption… I would like to have you on the task force, you’d be loads of help. If you’d like, you want to become a detective right? This may be a good chance to prove yourself.” Ryuuga said.

“That’d be awesome! I would love to, oh my gosh are you serious?!” I exclaimed. It would be just great to work alongside ‘L’.

“…Okay. You believe I’m actually ‘L’?” Ryuuga asked.

“Huh? Of course, why wouldn’t I? You look to be 23 years old, the assumed age of ‘L’. And what would you gain if you lied to me that you were ‘L’?” I countered.

“True… would you mind if I had your brother, Light on the case, too?” Ryuuga asked.

“that would be a dream come true. My two favourite people in the world together with me! Other than dad, mom and Sayu, of course.” I said, “ Oh by the way Ryuuga how much do you suspect me now of being ‘Kira’?” I asked.

“…” This question seemed to have taken him off guard.

“Okay, well I should get going, Light-Onii-chan may get suspicious, or worse, worried.” I said and left the coffee money on the table, walking out the door.

‘That was fun… I wonder if he really was serious about letting us on the team?’ I thought.

x

Once I got home Light was standing before me, arms crossed and brows furrowed.

“Where have you been? You texted me saying you were at a friends house, you and I both know… You don’t really have that many friends…” Light said.

“I’m sorry… I had to see Ryuuga though. I needed answers. I got none… Light-Onii-chan you do know Ryuuga is ‘L’ right?” I whispered so only he could hear.

“Huh? How’d you know about that?” Light asked.

I told him what had happened, excluding the spying part.

“Oh, really? Why do you believe he really is ‘L’ anyway. For all we know he could be ‘Kira’…” Light said.

I realized, he could be right. My eyes were a little watering up, he could have killed me if he was ‘Kira’! I closed the door behind me and hugged Light.

“I can’t believe I didn’t realize that sooner! I’m so dumb… I guess I just really wanted to believe he was ‘L’ that I ignored any other possibility… I’m sorry.” I said.

“It’s alright, don’t worry. Just be more careful.” Light said, kissing my forehead and walking up the steps to his room.

‘Guess, I should be going to my room too… I still need to check if they accepted me…For my college.’ I thought, heading to my room, when the phone rang.

I answered it, “Hello?”

“…Can I speak to Light?” I heard someone on the other end ask.

“Sure.” I said, “Light, phone’s for you!” I called.

Light came down the steps and grabbed the phone out of my hands and walked back upstairs.

‘Huh, I bet you anything it was Ryuuga. I remember his voice clearly.’ I thought, continuing on to my room, ‘I really got to get out of my “dress” clothes.’

I quickly changed into my purple Naruto pyjamas. They had pictures of Gaara on them. Gaara’s my favourite Naruto character.

I got up, and went into my bathroom and brushed my teeth, then took my hair down, and brushed that too.

‘I’m so confused… Is Ryuuga ‘L’ or is he ‘Kira’? Why does he suspect Light of being ‘Kira’, though? I sort of understand why he suspects me. I’m smart, and twice I was in a situation where someone was after me, and they died of a heart attack. Not to mention the detective who was following me died… after doing weird stuff.’ I thought, ‘But why Light? He’s smart. But he hasn’t done anything suspicious… has he?’. I wonder.

I walked up to Light’s room, and knocked. Again he locked the door. He came over and started unlocking the locks.

“Yeah?” Light answered.

“What did he say?” I asked. Coming in his room and laying down on his bed.

“He asked if I wanted to go play tennis with him this weekend…” Light said heading over to his desk and sitting in his computer chair. I love how Light knows who I’m talking about.
“Wait, tomorrow? What did you say?” I asked.

“I said ‘yes’. Maybe then I could find out if he’s really ‘L’…” Light said flipping through one of his magazines.

“Oh… cool. I just realized! That’s the… day I have to do the thing with choir club… Aww, I wanted to see you guys have your tennis match…” I said, pouting my lip out.

“I could call him to change the time of when we meet. When do you finish?” Light asked.

“I finish at around… 3:00. And it starts at around 1:00... Wait before you call what time are you guys supposed to meet at?” I asked.

“Well, at 12:30. That means you’d watch us for 30 minutes.” Light said.

“I guess that’s okay, I mean after the tennis game you guys will be planning on going to sit and talk, right?” I asked.

“I think so…” Light said.

“Okay, well good night Onii-chan. Wake me up when you’re getting up.” I said hopping off his bed and walking down the steps to my own comforter.

x

That morning.

“Hey, Rena! Wake up, c’mon…” Light said shoving me a bit.

I opened my eyes, “Uhh, I’m up…” I said.

“Rena, can you make me some pancakes? You know I’m not that good with cooking…” Light said scratching the back of his head.

“Yeah, okay.” I said with a giggle.

I got changed into my school uniform, after Light left the room.
I brushed my hair, and put it up in piggy tails with bows.

I opened my door and walked into the kitchen and started making the pancakes.

“Hey, Rena. You almost done?” Light asked.

“Yeah… Almost.” I said.

‘I can’t believe I’m wide awake; This early in the morning. It’s kinda funny… It seems I’ve been getting up early these days, and staying awake…’ I thought.

The pancakes were done, I put two on Light’s plate and two on my plate. We started eating again in silence, so I turned the T.V. on. It was showing Sayu’s favourite Sitcom, The one with Hideki Ryuuga. It was a repeat one though, the one I had been watching with Sayu recently.

“That’s kind of funny, how Ryuuga has the same name as the actor. Maybe it’s an alias.” I said.

“Yeah, maybe… Since ‘Kira’ only needs a name and face to kill.” Light said.

I took his plate and mine and rinsed it out, “So we going now?” I asked.

“Yeah, want to ride on our bikes there, or just walk?” Light asked.

“We could just walk…” I said, Light and I walking out the door.

x

Light’s and Ryuuga’s tennis match started. It was funny, they were really good, so they got a whole crowd there watching them and an empire. Just because they were good at tennis.

I just stayed there and watched silently, not voting for anyone to win.

‘Whoa, Ryuuga is really good, he may even be better than Light… And Light is pretty good, he was the champion a few years ago.’ I thought.

I kept watching them play, but I think I was a little bit more interested in Ryuuga playing. I analyzed how he played, how he reacted to every ball, and which side he was better at.
He seemed to have noticed me watching him, and he turned and looked at me. It was only a second, but it felt like eternity. It felt like he was peering into my soul, into my heart and mind. Not in a creepy way though. (whoa, way too much description.)

Ryuuga missed the ball. The game ended. Light was the victor.
I came into the arena, “Good game, guys! You guys really did great. Congratulations Light! Don’t worry Ryuuga-kun, you still did a good job too!” I said cheering them both.

I felt self-conscious, everyone stared at me. They weren’t glaring at me, they were gawking at me. It felt uncomfortable, so I said my good byes. And left for my choir practise.

“Sorry I’m a little late guys…” I said, when I made it to the club.

“Don’t worry you weren’t that late.” Said Kyo our club president.

“Okay...good, so what song are we gonna be practising?” I asked, getting into my position.

I was chosen to be the lead vocalist. It was kind of stressful though, knowing I’ll have to sing a solo, with many eyes staring up at me.

We were practising songs we had made up, this one was a lullaby. We just altered the lullaby a bit, so it would be our own.

x

Choir practise was over, and I was a bit hungry… It was getting close to supper time.

“Bye, guys…” I said heading out.

The choir members are the only people I actually feel comfortable around. They are good buddies, but they aren’t friends. I don’t think I feel comfortable enough to have other people in my life… To see how I am, I’m just too shy.

“Hirogaru yami no naka kawashiatta kakumei no chigiri
Aishita yue ni mebaeta aku no hana
Kore kara saki otozureru de arou subete wo
Dare ni mo jama saseru wake ni wa ikanai kara
Kajitsu ga tsugeta mirai
Risei wo wasureta machi
Kuroku yuganda ima wo
Yume, risou ni kaeru
Doushite? Boku wa kowareta Messiah?” My cell phone rang.

I answered, “Hello?”

“Hurry Rena! Your father, he had a heart attack!” I heard my mother’s voice say on the other end.

“What? Okay, I’ll be right there!” I said and hung up.

I started running to where Light would be, I need to let him know, if he doesn’t know already.

I stopped in the coffee place I had token Ryuuga yesterday, and ran to the table where I saw my brother sitting in.

“Light, let’s go! Dad just-” I said.

“I know, Ryuuga will give us a lift there.” Light said.

Light, Ryuuga and I ran to Ryuuga’s limo… He has a limo? How rich is he anyway? We got in, and sped to the hospital where dad is being held.

“Dad! You scared me so much! I thought maybe ‘Kira’ had gotten you!” I said when we were led to his room.

“Dad, are you okay?” Light asked.

“Yeah, I’m fine… I had thought too… that it was ‘Kira’ when I collapsed. But it was really the cause of stress.” Dad said.

Dad told us that Ryuuga is really ‘L’. So Ryuuga wasn’t lying…I guess that’s a relief.

“I’m sorry, but visiting hours have been done 5 hours ago.” A nurse said.

We left Dad, and went outside the front of the hospital.

“Hmm, so I guess I’ll have you two on the team, then?” Ryuuga asked, stepping inside his limo.

“I don’t think I want to work with someone who suspects that I’m ‘Kira’!” Light said, “I mean how would you feel if someone suspected that you were ‘Kira’?!” Light asked.

“…It was one of the worst feelings in the world.” Ryuuga said, “But if you’re not ‘Kira’, then it will be alright…Everything will unfold itself.” Ryuuga said.

“I don’t think I’ll be helping out much right now, until dad gets better.” Light said.

“Of course.” Ryuuga said, “ What about you Rena-chan?” Ryuuga asked.

“…I think I will come and help, dad will be alright if Onii-chan is there.” I said.

“Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow at this address then.” Ryuuga said handing a piece of paper to me,” And Light tonight I almost believed you weren’t actually ‘Kira’ with that performance.” Ryuuga said.

“Bye.” Me, Light and Ryuuga said to each other

Light and I got a taxi ride home, since the hospital was a little ways away from home. And it was getting darker.

When we got home, me and Light just walked straight to our rooms without a word and fell asleep. But not before I set my alarm to wake up at around 10:00 A.M.