The Bubble Girl
Everday= a living hell
Verminophobia: the fear of germs. I was diagnosed with verminophobia when I was in 6th grade. I have been to four psychiatrists and two mental institutions and yet nobody has been able to help me in any way what so ever. The last institution I was at made me room with some fat kid that had a cold and was afraid of mice. What did I do to deserve that? And who in their right mind is afraid of mice? Anyways, my newest psychiatrist said to make a journal of my life in high school so I can see my improvement. HA! Well, today is supposed to be my first day... we'll see how it goes. I already had 3 panic attacks today. I mean imagine 3,000 people walking around coughing, sneezing, spitting, touching everything and every one, sharing books, whispering in each others ears, and holding those nasty, germ infested lunch trays. It's disgusting. Just think about those microscopic parasites that carry nasty diseases. The state actually makes us go to somewhere that can kill you! Aw, crap, the bus is here. Eww, the bus. I feel another panic attack coming on. I can't breathe....
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I woke up to my mom shaking me. "Kimberly," she was screaming. I opened my eyes and looked at her. She kept shaking me. "You're gonna miss the bus get up!" I started to close my eyes again which, made her shake me harder. I looked up at her now getting annoyed
"Mom, I cant get up if you don't let me go," I said. She let go of me and stood up. She stood there staring at me. I stood up and sighed. "Mom, what if someone coughs on me?" I was about to cry. I'd prefer to be the home schooled freak for the rest of my life then to have to go to high school. She hugged me closely.
"I promise it's not as bad as you think it will be," she said while brushing my hair. "Now come on!" She grabbed my book bag off the floor and pushed me out of my bedroom. "If you have any problems call. But only in a dire emergency." She put my backpack on my back and shoved me out the front door. "Love you, hunny!" I turned my back on her and walked to the giant yellow whale that sat in front of my house. I sighed and got on.
The bus was packed with loud-mouth kids pushing and laughing with each other. All of the seats in the front were taken. There was a seat 6 rows back. I sighed and walked to it. As I slid in I looked out the window to see my mom taking a picture of the bus. I put my hand over my eyes and prayed this would go away. As the bus took off I noticed where I was sitting. The black leather seats were sticky and dirt infested. I reached into my back pack and pulled out a wet wipe. I thoroughly cleaned my seat and then sat down. I looked over to see a guy with brown flippy hair and bright green eyes. He raised one of his eyebrows at me.
"What are you doing?" he asked. His voice was deep and scratchy. He got out of his seat and sat beside me.
"Um, I have a phobia of, um, germs," I said. I looked into his deep green eyes. He looked at me curiously, which wasn't the normal thing people did. Usually I got the look of 'This lady is crazy' or 'That's just stupid' but, he stared at me like I told him something interesting. This boy must be crazy.
"How long have you been afraid of germs?" he asked staring into my eyes.
"Um, since sixth grade. When, um, my teacher made us watch a video in science class about different viruses and, um, then she told us that they were every where," I said trying to sop staring into his eye. "At first I was awful about it. In fact I was a bubble girl. I made my mom buy me a bubble and put me in it. I was home schooled up until now. I have been to two mental hospitals because my mom needs to go back to work. Oh, crap, I'm rambling sorry." I looked down finally breaking eye contact. He put his hand underneath my chin and tilted my head back up so he was staring into my eyes again.
"It's cool. I have a fear of spiders if that makes a difference," he said. I looked at his hand trying not to imagine the germs that were crawling all over them. I shuddered at the idea. He looked down at his hand and pulled away. "Sorry, didn't think it was that bad."
"It's okay. I'm used to it. I grabbed another wipe from my bag and wiped off my chin. I looked at his hands and wiped them off too. He chuckled. "Sorry, I had to. Well, at least you are sterile now."
"It's fine really," he said looking again deeply into my eyes. I felt like I might get lost in them. "But, you know you eyes are pretty."
"Oh, really thanks," I said blushing some. "I thought they were just like any other persons brown eyes."
"Well, at first glance they are," he said still staring, "but, when the light hits them they are a pretty red-brown, and when you look deeply into them they are a milk chocolate and if you look hard enough the around your iris is bronze."
"Wow," I said in almost a whisper. "You're eyes are a cool green... um, I'm not good with describing things. Most of the time when I describe stuff it makes what I'm describing sound awful." He chuckled.
"It's okay," he said. He looked at me nervously now. I furrowed my eyebrows. What had I done wrong? He said cleaning his hands were okay. He smirked some then, he touched my cheek and brushed a stray hair behind my ear. "Your so cute when you're confused." He stared at me again. "Hell your cute all the time." I blushed crimson red. I could feel the warmth of my cheeks. "Especially when you blush." I looked down. "Um, you wanna eat lunch with me today and tomorrow...?" He touched my cheek again.
"I'd love to," I said looking up at him. I grinned the widest grin I had ever grinned. I really like this boy. I thought to myself. I bet my psychiatrist didn't plan on this happening. Or my mom for that matter.
"I wish it was every day from now on," he said under his breath. He looked down at the seat. I put my hand under his chin and tilted his head up so he was looking into my eyes again.
"I wish that too," I said. He smirked and grabbed my face in his hands and kissed me. I didn't even think twice about how he hadn't cleaned his face with a wipe. He was different to me. He wasn't dirty. He didn't feel dirty. He was perfect. He was mine.
☼ ☼ ☼
I woke up to my mom shaking me. "Kimberly," she was screaming. I opened my eyes and looked at her. She kept shaking me. "You're gonna miss the bus get up!" I started to close my eyes again which, made her shake me harder. I looked up at her now getting annoyed
"Mom, I cant get up if you don't let me go," I said. She let go of me and stood up. She stood there staring at me. I stood up and sighed. "Mom, what if someone coughs on me?" I was about to cry. I'd prefer to be the home schooled freak for the rest of my life then to have to go to high school. She hugged me closely.
"I promise it's not as bad as you think it will be," she said while brushing my hair. "Now come on!" She grabbed my book bag off the floor and pushed me out of my bedroom. "If you have any problems call. But only in a dire emergency." She put my backpack on my back and shoved me out the front door. "Love you, hunny!" I turned my back on her and walked to the giant yellow whale that sat in front of my house. I sighed and got on.
The bus was packed with loud-mouth kids pushing and laughing with each other. All of the seats in the front were taken. There was a seat 6 rows back. I sighed and walked to it. As I slid in I looked out the window to see my mom taking a picture of the bus. I put my hand over my eyes and prayed this would go away. As the bus took off I noticed where I was sitting. The black leather seats were sticky and dirt infested. I reached into my back pack and pulled out a wet wipe. I thoroughly cleaned my seat and then sat down. I looked over to see a guy with brown flippy hair and bright green eyes. He raised one of his eyebrows at me.
"What are you doing?" he asked. His voice was deep and scratchy. He got out of his seat and sat beside me.
"Um, I have a phobia of, um, germs," I said. I looked into his deep green eyes. He looked at me curiously, which wasn't the normal thing people did. Usually I got the look of 'This lady is crazy' or 'That's just stupid' but, he stared at me like I told him something interesting. This boy must be crazy.
"How long have you been afraid of germs?" he asked staring into my eyes.
"Um, since sixth grade. When, um, my teacher made us watch a video in science class about different viruses and, um, then she told us that they were every where," I said trying to sop staring into his eye. "At first I was awful about it. In fact I was a bubble girl. I made my mom buy me a bubble and put me in it. I was home schooled up until now. I have been to two mental hospitals because my mom needs to go back to work. Oh, crap, I'm rambling sorry." I looked down finally breaking eye contact. He put his hand underneath my chin and tilted my head back up so he was staring into my eyes again.
"It's cool. I have a fear of spiders if that makes a difference," he said. I looked at his hand trying not to imagine the germs that were crawling all over them. I shuddered at the idea. He looked down at his hand and pulled away. "Sorry, didn't think it was that bad."
"It's okay. I'm used to it. I grabbed another wipe from my bag and wiped off my chin. I looked at his hands and wiped them off too. He chuckled. "Sorry, I had to. Well, at least you are sterile now."
"It's fine really," he said looking again deeply into my eyes. I felt like I might get lost in them. "But, you know you eyes are pretty."
"Oh, really thanks," I said blushing some. "I thought they were just like any other persons brown eyes."
"Well, at first glance they are," he said still staring, "but, when the light hits them they are a pretty red-brown, and when you look deeply into them they are a milk chocolate and if you look hard enough the around your iris is bronze."
"Wow," I said in almost a whisper. "You're eyes are a cool green... um, I'm not good with describing things. Most of the time when I describe stuff it makes what I'm describing sound awful." He chuckled.
"It's okay," he said. He looked at me nervously now. I furrowed my eyebrows. What had I done wrong? He said cleaning his hands were okay. He smirked some then, he touched my cheek and brushed a stray hair behind my ear. "Your so cute when you're confused." He stared at me again. "Hell your cute all the time." I blushed crimson red. I could feel the warmth of my cheeks. "Especially when you blush." I looked down. "Um, you wanna eat lunch with me today and tomorrow...?" He touched my cheek again.
"I'd love to," I said looking up at him. I grinned the widest grin I had ever grinned. I really like this boy. I thought to myself. I bet my psychiatrist didn't plan on this happening. Or my mom for that matter.
"I wish it was every day from now on," he said under his breath. He looked down at the seat. I put my hand under his chin and tilted his head up so he was looking into my eyes again.
"I wish that too," I said. He smirked and grabbed my face in his hands and kissed me. I didn't even think twice about how he hadn't cleaned his face with a wipe. He was different to me. He wasn't dirty. He didn't feel dirty. He was perfect. He was mine.