Resurrection

Efforts

Waking up now seemed pointless and useless. It was not that I had given up living, just that there was nothing to live for. I got out of the bed reluctantly, went to balcony and got the newspaper and put it on the kitchen table, made my coffee, finally sat and read the paper. The basic monotonous routine any working person follows. Mine was a bit different. I finished the coffee and went to my parents’ room, where hung the photo of their wedding day. I went and lighted the two candles that lay next to their wedding rings’ boxes, and fixed them in the candle stand. I didn’t have enough courage to see their faces so I left their room and headed for my little brother Edwin’s. On entering I saw my most favorite photo of his, hanging on the wall facing his bed, I looked around his room, it was exactly in the same manner it had been two months ago. Just a little tidier.

I loved to sit here and think, think of all those things we did together, think of my parents, think of that dreadful accident and think of how much I miss my family. I hadn’t realized that I had been able to conjure hell amount of tears by this time in my baggy eyes.

With all the courage, the braveness inside me I had tried to get over the incident but this was not some heart break given to me by my boyfriend or something, this was a bond that god had gifted me with. I had not wanted anything more, I was perfectly happy with my family. But there are always hardships in ones’ life and so are there in mine. I had gained a reasonable amount of self-control since the last month but the thought of my little brother in the morgue always caught me off-guard. Mom and dad had gone to Edwin’s school for his basketball match. While returning a drunkard truck driver hit their car. A car passing by took them to the hospital. Edwin was announced to be dead on the way itself, dad died just as I reached the hospital. I had been at the office at the time of the accident.

Mom's condition was very critical at the moment. She had got her consciousness back for a few minutes before she died. She had told me “Evelyn, take care of yourself, life has to move on, I may not be there standing alive with you in your problems or success but remember- me, dad and Edwin are gonna always live in your heart. Your dad and I are really very proud of you. I love you, Evelyn.”

I went out of Edwin’s room. Took shower and got into my sweats and tee-shirt to go to the park for jogging. I had started going to the park to keep myself busy. I had tried my hardest not to be free. Free time was not what I preferred at least till 6 months.

I was not the health conscious type. I could just pass for thin but not the skeleton thin. My 5’7’’ frame made look a bit thinner than I actually was. Another reason to go to the park was there I saw all the families, enjoying their time and I remembered mine. Until now I hadn’t realized their importance in my life, they were like the air, very often ignored but very essential for survival too. But then I had to take care of the time I spent there as well because if I spent too much time looking at them I was sure gonna cry again. I looked at my watch-Crap!!- 8:30! I was running late for work.

I worked in an estate agency, Harold Estates, where I was the secretary of Mr. Mark Harold. He is a 66 year old widower and he is really very nice. He even wanted me to move in with him, he really didn't think I would be able to hold myself together after the accident. He doesn’t have any children. But still in the office I am more of his daughter than an employee.

Everyone was sympathetic with me but I didn’t want their sympathy I just wanted them to be normal because their sympathy reminds me I am alone in this world. I had started to get back to my normal life but I couldn’t get it right. Every time I did something it just reminded me of my mom, dad or Edwin. But all I wanted to do now was to lead a “normal” life. But all my efforts were futile. And unfortunately all I could do was make efforts.
♠ ♠ ♠
I'd LOVE to have CC. I know this chapter is short but they all get longer gradually. I thought if I wrote anything more, I would spoil it, so I left it at that. But don't worry, chapter are far more longer than this.