Insanity Line That Is Wearing Thin.
14:Isolation
In fear every day, m every evening,
He calls her aloud from above,
Carefully watched for a reason,
Painstaking devotion and love,
Surrendered to self preservation,
From others who care for themselves.
A blindness that touches perfection,
But hurts just like anything else.
Isolation, isolation, isolation.
Mother I tried please believe me,
I'm doing the best that I can.
I'm ashamed of the things I've been put through,
I'm ashamed of the person I am.
Isolation, isolation, isolation.
But if you could just see the beauty,
These things I could never describe,
These pleasures a wayward distraction,
This is my one lucky prize.
I felt around the ground. Where was I?
"Shit! Joseph what do I do? I don't understand why she fainted." Frank? Who was he talking to, better yet who was this Joseph? I tried to open my eyes but they wouldn't budge. What the fuck? Am I dead?
Can't be. What was the last thing that happened that lead me to this. First I went to find Frank. Then he told... it hit me then. I was scared to tell Frank how I felt. God I'm an asshole. But I fainted then how can I still here what there saying?
Shut up dummy, there talking again Great, even unconscious I can still hear her.
"Do you have water?" It sounded like Frank but his voice was different? "Yes but what is that going to do?"
Suddenly I felt a wave of water splash on me. haha. My eyes shot open and I was face to face with a pair of hazel eyes. Franks of course. "How are you feeling? Sorry about the water I didn't know how else to wake you up." I noticed I was standing up still by his arms.
"Thanks." I was baffled. Confused. Who was Joseph and why did I faint. Am I that afraid of telling my feelings? My thoughts were cut short by a hand being waved in front of my face.
"Sorry to dazed off" I snaked my way out of Franks arms. Awkwardness was in the air alright. Frank cleared his throat. "Sorry-" "Don't be" I cut him off. "It's my fault. I was over excited." I blushed looking towards the floor.
Stupid stop flirting and ask him who's Joseph Shut up. Please leave me alone. I wish you would just disappear.
"I'm sorry before if you heard... somethings." He stumbled on the last word trying to spit it out.
"Its find don't worry about it, only one question." I knew we were both thinking the same thing 'here it comes' "Who is Joseph?"
Frank scuffled his feet around trying to Scrabble up an answer. "Remember when I first told you about how I talk to myself?" I nodded. "Well" He chocked on his answer once again. "I try to make my voice sound at least civilized by naming him. So we both agreed on Joseph" As much as he thought it was strange it sounded pretty civilized.
"I wish my other half was as civilized as yours." He laughed at me. "I name the voice in my mind and you think that its civilized?" Frank had a point.
"I guess that does sound pretty silly but its true" We stood laughing together. I knew the awkwardness was broken and this was a good time to ask some questions I was thinking about for a while. "Tell me something about yourself I never knew." Maybe it was the wrong thing to ask at that time.
Aren't you the one with all the right questions today? Shut up.
"When I lived with my mother she would call this." He pointed to his head. "A 'gift', but I always looked at it as a curse." He sighed. I felt bad, I shouldn't have asked him that. "I would always hide it from my mother when Joseph would want to talk. I would cover up anything so my mother wouldn't be ashamed of me although I knew she was in some way."
"My father wasn't really around, he had a new love in his life and he forgot all about his other life, with me and my mother. We only had one thing in common, Music." He pulled out a pick from his pocket. "He gave me a guitar for my 5th birthday. I would play it every day. I wasn't good but I practice everyday until the weekend came when he would teach me something new." He put the pick away. "My dad never had a clue about Joseph until my mother really couldn't stand to see me in pain and put me away to get help. I remember she only just had enough to put me away and send me some money per week."
He looked at me. "She came once you know." I nodded not know what to say at that moment. "The stupid bitch nurse told her I wasn't in the right state to see anyone and was too sick to see people for a long time. I remember the letter she wrote telling me she would pray for me every day until I was able to come home to her and hug her." He sighed again. " I guess I wont be seeing her any time soon."
"I'm sorry." He turned to me and I gave him a huge hug. I wasn't sure if I would ever be able to tell him how I feel. "Hey what can you do? Well lets go round up the rest of the crazies" I laughed and he grabbed my hand as we walked towards the other side of the parking lot.
I slowed down. Did he really just grab my hand? Am I imaging things? "Sorry" He went to untwine our hands when I grabs his tighter. "Its alright. I just never really held hands with someone before." He smiled at me and I almost melted right into the pavement.
We walked silently playing a game with our hands. He would grip my hand hard then let lighten up his grip. Then I would do the same. We played this as we walked through the parking lot.
Up ahead we saw the lights from the Gas station and the strip next to it alined with stores. As we got closer we could make out the van with Mikey and Lexie sitting on top of the car with Gerard and Katlyn leaning against the van.
We saw Mikey jump down off the car then look towards a tiny store with big windows and inside was Jack and Ray arguing with three guys. Within a blink of an eye Mikey ran towards the store with me and Frank running behind.
Once inside the store we noticed that one of the men had a gun on the side of his hip. I dropped to the floor pulling my hands over my head and curling up into a little ball as the man pulled out the gun and pointed it towards Jack and Ray.
There was silence than a clack, boom followed by shrieking, screams, running than a body hitting the ground. I moved my hands from over my head to find my face and body was splattered with warm liquid. I didn't realize it was blood until I saw who's body was lying next to me and the screaming that was coming out of my mouth.
He calls her aloud from above,
Carefully watched for a reason,
Painstaking devotion and love,
Surrendered to self preservation,
From others who care for themselves.
A blindness that touches perfection,
But hurts just like anything else.
Isolation, isolation, isolation.
Mother I tried please believe me,
I'm doing the best that I can.
I'm ashamed of the things I've been put through,
I'm ashamed of the person I am.
Isolation, isolation, isolation.
But if you could just see the beauty,
These things I could never describe,
These pleasures a wayward distraction,
This is my one lucky prize.
I felt around the ground. Where was I?
"Shit! Joseph what do I do? I don't understand why she fainted." Frank? Who was he talking to, better yet who was this Joseph? I tried to open my eyes but they wouldn't budge. What the fuck? Am I dead?
Can't be. What was the last thing that happened that lead me to this. First I went to find Frank. Then he told... it hit me then. I was scared to tell Frank how I felt. God I'm an asshole. But I fainted then how can I still here what there saying?
Shut up dummy, there talking again Great, even unconscious I can still hear her.
"Do you have water?" It sounded like Frank but his voice was different? "Yes but what is that going to do?"
Suddenly I felt a wave of water splash on me. haha. My eyes shot open and I was face to face with a pair of hazel eyes. Franks of course. "How are you feeling? Sorry about the water I didn't know how else to wake you up." I noticed I was standing up still by his arms.
"Thanks." I was baffled. Confused. Who was Joseph and why did I faint. Am I that afraid of telling my feelings? My thoughts were cut short by a hand being waved in front of my face.
"Sorry to dazed off" I snaked my way out of Franks arms. Awkwardness was in the air alright. Frank cleared his throat. "Sorry-" "Don't be" I cut him off. "It's my fault. I was over excited." I blushed looking towards the floor.
Stupid stop flirting and ask him who's Joseph Shut up. Please leave me alone. I wish you would just disappear.
"I'm sorry before if you heard... somethings." He stumbled on the last word trying to spit it out.
"Its find don't worry about it, only one question." I knew we were both thinking the same thing 'here it comes' "Who is Joseph?"
Frank scuffled his feet around trying to Scrabble up an answer. "Remember when I first told you about how I talk to myself?" I nodded. "Well" He chocked on his answer once again. "I try to make my voice sound at least civilized by naming him. So we both agreed on Joseph" As much as he thought it was strange it sounded pretty civilized.
"I wish my other half was as civilized as yours." He laughed at me. "I name the voice in my mind and you think that its civilized?" Frank had a point.
"I guess that does sound pretty silly but its true" We stood laughing together. I knew the awkwardness was broken and this was a good time to ask some questions I was thinking about for a while. "Tell me something about yourself I never knew." Maybe it was the wrong thing to ask at that time.
Aren't you the one with all the right questions today? Shut up.
"When I lived with my mother she would call this." He pointed to his head. "A 'gift', but I always looked at it as a curse." He sighed. I felt bad, I shouldn't have asked him that. "I would always hide it from my mother when Joseph would want to talk. I would cover up anything so my mother wouldn't be ashamed of me although I knew she was in some way."
"My father wasn't really around, he had a new love in his life and he forgot all about his other life, with me and my mother. We only had one thing in common, Music." He pulled out a pick from his pocket. "He gave me a guitar for my 5th birthday. I would play it every day. I wasn't good but I practice everyday until the weekend came when he would teach me something new." He put the pick away. "My dad never had a clue about Joseph until my mother really couldn't stand to see me in pain and put me away to get help. I remember she only just had enough to put me away and send me some money per week."
He looked at me. "She came once you know." I nodded not know what to say at that moment. "The stupid bitch nurse told her I wasn't in the right state to see anyone and was too sick to see people for a long time. I remember the letter she wrote telling me she would pray for me every day until I was able to come home to her and hug her." He sighed again. " I guess I wont be seeing her any time soon."
"I'm sorry." He turned to me and I gave him a huge hug. I wasn't sure if I would ever be able to tell him how I feel. "Hey what can you do? Well lets go round up the rest of the crazies" I laughed and he grabbed my hand as we walked towards the other side of the parking lot.
I slowed down. Did he really just grab my hand? Am I imaging things? "Sorry" He went to untwine our hands when I grabs his tighter. "Its alright. I just never really held hands with someone before." He smiled at me and I almost melted right into the pavement.
We walked silently playing a game with our hands. He would grip my hand hard then let lighten up his grip. Then I would do the same. We played this as we walked through the parking lot.
Up ahead we saw the lights from the Gas station and the strip next to it alined with stores. As we got closer we could make out the van with Mikey and Lexie sitting on top of the car with Gerard and Katlyn leaning against the van.
We saw Mikey jump down off the car then look towards a tiny store with big windows and inside was Jack and Ray arguing with three guys. Within a blink of an eye Mikey ran towards the store with me and Frank running behind.
Once inside the store we noticed that one of the men had a gun on the side of his hip. I dropped to the floor pulling my hands over my head and curling up into a little ball as the man pulled out the gun and pointed it towards Jack and Ray.
There was silence than a clack, boom followed by shrieking, screams, running than a body hitting the ground. I moved my hands from over my head to find my face and body was splattered with warm liquid. I didn't realize it was blood until I saw who's body was lying next to me and the screaming that was coming out of my mouth.
♠ ♠ ♠
I know bad me for leaving it off at a cliff hanger but it seemed good to leave it off like that. I'm def going to use Wake Up or Home by TDG because Isolation just fit this chapter perfectly. well I won't update unless I have three comments. Pwease? I love you thank you for reading =)