Somebody To Love

That night, I could not sleep for long. I lay awake in bed, thinking of what happened only hours ago. It was sexual, but it didn’t feel like it was at all. It felt so different. Was this what it felt like to be in love? Did I love Frank?

I sighed, thinking about it, almost whispering it to myself. I love him. I, Ray Toro, fucking love Frank Iero. However, every time I thought about this, another burning question popped into my head. Does he love me? I thought it over and all I could come up with brought up more questions.

What if I finally got up the nerve to tell him I love him? Just said it so randomly like, those women always do in those sappy romance movies during the big climax, and the men stair blankly at there faces, like they had just been shot. Would he lie and say yes? Just to please me? Would he say anything at all?

I groaned lightly in frustration, turning into my side, facing his sleeping forum. I ran my fingers lightly over his face, letting out a little sigh. I leaned down to kiss his cheek. He was perfect. Every bit of him. He made me so happy. His face was blank as he slept, filled with peaceful dreaming, but it filched slightly at my touch.

He always had that face on at school, except for history class, which we had together. His face always held a smile and we joked together as we did our class work, our desks pulled together, our shoulders touching. And whenever someone would call us fags in class or in the halls, Frank would look directly at them, then turn to kiss me, his eyes never leaving there face. My cheeks would always burn red in embarrassment, but I secretly felt proud about it. Proud to have a boyfriend like Frank, who wasn’t scared of who he was. However, was that enough for him to love me? Or was it just showing off his sexuality?

I lay back down and sighed again, pulling the covers up to my cheek, deciding not to think about it anymore. I slowly drifted off to sleep.

The next morning I woke up to him poking me, sitting on the bed.

“Ray, it’s time to get up,” he said, clad only in a towel that hung loosely around his waste, his hair dripping wet. He looked fresh out of the shower. “We have to go to school. Breakfast is on the bedside table.”

I nodded, sitting up, rubbing the sleep out of my eyes as I put the plate of waffles waiting for me on my lap to eat.

Frank smiled, kissing from my cheek to my lips, “Sleep well?”

I nodded, kissing back, “Yeah, pretty good.”

“That’s good,” he responded, getting up, pulling off the towel as he headed over to his dresser.

I nearly choked on my waffle, but continued to eat, watching him as he slid into a new pair of boxers and soon his clothes for the day.

I finished, putting my plate on the table, getting up to get dressed myself.
I felt his eyes on my ass while I changed underwear and blushed. It was all so new to me, but I was getting use to it… fast.

He smiled, coming up to me once I was fully dressed, kissing me, wrapping his arms around my back, “You feel ready about the test?”

“Ready as I’ll ever be,” I responded, looking into his face, temporarily getting lost in his perfect eyes. “Our whole relationship rests on this test. If I fail, my mother will have a cow.”

Frank laughed, “But you said your mother liked me.”

“Yes she likes you, but she wants me to do well in school,” I responded, sounding like a total nerd.

We were quite for a little bit, just looking at each other.

He grinned and seemed to read my eyes, “What are you thinking about?”

What was I thinking about? How much a fucking loved him, that’s what I was thinking about. However, I lied.

“Oh nothing,” I responded, but he knew I was thinking about something, but that something had to be kept away, at least for a little bit. Until I just came out. I started to feel my stomach churn. Keeping it down was going to be hard.

He didn’t press it any further and gave me a quick kiss, checking his watch, “We got to go, or we are going to be late.”

We collected our backpacks and left to go to school in his car. The car ride over was quite as Frank smoked his morning cigarette and sipped at his coffee he had brought along. I could not help but watch him, my stomach pangs and nervousness growing. I knew it wasn’t because of the test.

He seemed lost in his thoughts as he drove. I often wondered what he was thinking about. Today he seemed to be contemplating something. Thinking about something deep. He kept one hand on the wheel as he smoked, stroking his chin from time to time.

I had to ask, “What are you thinking about?”

He looked at me, broken from his thoughts, “Huh?”

I repeated the question.

His face pulled into a smile, “Well, you didn’t tell me what you were thinking about, so I’m not going to tell you.”

I felt a pang of guilt as we pulled up to school, for not telling him, but I didn’t want to shock him. Frank killed the engine and we both got out, getting out bags.

“We have five minutes, we can make it, but we have to hurry,” Frank said, locking the car, beginning to walk to school.

Yet something seemed to mount me in place. I could not keep it in any longer. I had to tell him. It would eat me alive all day.

“Frank!”

He turned around, a few car lengths away, “What? Did you forget anything in the car?”

“No,” I said, catching up to him.

My mind was screaming at me to tell him and my stomach seemed to churn more as my mind raced. I took a deep breath and squeezed my eyes shut, and let it spill out.

“Frank, I love you.”

He seemed caught off gaud, “What?”

“I said, I love you,” I repeated, almost unable to believe I said it myself.

He dropped his back pack, pulling me closer to him, kissing me harder then he ever had before, whispering back, “I love you, too. Is that what you were thinking about before?”

I nodded, biting my lip a little, relieved.

“Me too,” he responded, wrapping himself up in my arms, “I didn’t want to tell you. I thought it was too soon. I didn’t want to upset you or anything.”

I let his head rest against my chest as I stroked his hair, inhaling his sent, “Same here. I didn’t know how you’d react.”

I heard the late bell ring in the distance, but neither one of us moved. We just stayed in each others arms until it felt right to let go, both sighing.

“I guess we better be getting our late passes and get to homeroom,” I said, motioning towards school.

“Yeah,” Frank nodded, picking up his backpack, clearing his throat. He kept whipping his eyes and sniffing. “Or we are going to be in trouble.”

I whispered lightly, “Are you crying?”

“Lets just get to school,” he said, changing the subject as his voice cracked, walking towards the school. “Were late.”

I grinned following him. I was proud. I successfully made Frank Iero, the toughest and hardest guy I’ve ever known, cry. All just by saying I loved him. It was worth the after school detention.