Get It Up

Hayley's P.O.V

"Dear Hayley,
Max will never ever like you in your little emo life.
so get the fuck over it!
Alright?!"

- Kiki

I tore up the note. Stupid little fucking bitch thinks she can say shit like that to me.
well, certainly fuck her and Max and her little anorexic hoes.

Well, I couldn't really say anything about anorexia...I was pretty slender myself; wasn't normal.
I barely ate, I didn't give a shit about it, either.
I was 5'6, and weighed about 89 pounds. Not to mention I was soon to be 18.
Here's what would happen if I ate more than I normally ate:
Get seriously sick, start cutting myself, and finally, make myself throw up.
congratulations, I have an eating disorder. Just like a lot of teenage girls that were told they were fat all their lives when they were tiny as fuck.

We make ourselves throw up, and a lot of the times, end up in the hospital, and sometimes, die.

Having an eating disorder wasn't the only thing that was wrong with me;
I smoked weed, did heroin, cocaine, pills, and all of that.
Been doing it since I was about 13, couldn't help myself.
and there was no way in hell I'm going to rehab; might as well check me into the psych ward while you're at it.
Just your average fucked up teenager; you may thank my dad and step mom for that.

Sometimes I felt like I was the only sane one in this family.
Max, was the only one I could talk about what was going on. Ms. Slut brainwashed him.
so now, the only time we talked was if we were fighting.
He never approved of me doing drugs, I quit when we were going out; only time I felt happy.
then, the breakup happened.

"I cannot fucking believe you! Bullshit you loved me!"
"Hayley, I do love you-"
"Save it! I found you in bed with Brianne! God, I'm so stupid!"
"Not my fault-"
"Really, Max?!? Then tell me, son. Why did I find you and her having sex?"
I watched him shrug.
"God, I'm gonna kill you if I get an STD or if I'm pregnant. You fucking asshole!"
I felt like I couldn't be sober anymore; needed to get out of here.
"You don't understand-"
Tears rolled down my face. "D-don't understand w-what?"
"Th-that...I can't control myself...she was just..."
"Hot? Beautiful? Sexy? All the things I'm not."
He backed away; looking down
"Whatever, knew this was too good to be true."
I walked away; knowing that would be one of the last times I'd talk to him without yelling...

Age 15 was the last time I was ever sober; when I was with Max.

But just...somehow, after the baby project; Max and I got closer? Was that the word?
Very unsure. All I know is that whenever Kiki started shit, he'd stop her.
Not to mention he'd always be talking to me whenever he wasn't around Kiki.
It kinda made me wonder...
if he liked me...or was playing me again. Either way, I was prepared for whatever would happen with me and him.

I stared down at my notebook, waiting for the bell to ring. It would be the weekend, and, i could relax at Lacey's with no one to bother me.
no dad. no step mom. no Max.
Someone kicked my chair; I turned around to see who it was.
didn't surprise me. It was Max.
"What?", I asked.
He shook his head.
"Do work. We'll get in trouble.", I said staring at my notebook again.
"Just...meet me after class. I need to talk to you...alone.", he whispered.
'Shiiiiiittttt.', I thought to myself.
he's gonna have his friends kill me.
or worse.
have Kiki attempt to kill me.
But I couldn't ignore him, it was rude.

The bell finally rang.
I quickly got up from my seat. Max said he wanted to be alone with me.
did that mean with no one in the school, or just not around Kiki?
I looked around for his gorgeous self. Mostly everyone had left. I found him; Kiki was still with him.
I didn't go over to him right away.
so I overheard his conversation with Kiki.
"But babe...I want you to come with me.", Kiki whined.
Max hugged her. "I know, I know. But I got shit to take care of. I'll call you when I get home."
"Kill that slut, Hayley. I don't know why anyone tolerates or likes her."
Max got a pissed off look on his face. "She's not a slut. She's still a virgin."
The virgin part was a lie.
'Cause he was the one who took it from he.
actually, we took it from each other.
Kiki groaned. "Just don't be too long."
He kissed her. "I won't, I promise."

Kiki started walking away to her car.
"Have fun with your new car, I hope it blows up!", I blurted out laughing,
Kiki gave me a dirty look. "At least I have a car!"
I shook my head. "I put a bomb in it. So it'll blow up. Then I'll laugh."
"Bitch."
"Slut."
"Whore."
"Skank."
Max came up to Kiki. "Leave her alone, she's not worth arguing with."
Kiki whined. "Just one punch-"
"You'll break a nail, Kiki darling.", I laughed.
"Go be an emo and cut yourself!", she yelled.
"I'll be cutting something alright. It certainly won't be myself...", I walked toward Kiki.
"Hayley, don't listen to her. Kiki, go home. I'll meet you there."
"Bye, trashy whore.", I said.
She walked away not even looking at me or Max.

Me and Max started walking with each other. By that time, everyone was out of the building.
"You just love tormenting my girlfriend, huh?", Max laughed a little.
I smiled. "Can never get enough of that."
He laughed. "Still the same old Hayley. Beautiful, smart, and of course kickass."
Was he hitting on me?
"Haha, thanks...I think. You're still the same- No, wait. You aren't the same.", I sighed.
"What do you mean by that?", he asked.
"Let's see...basically told the whole school I was pregnant, called me a whore, let your hoe say a bunch a shit, made both of us almost fail the baby project, and finally, you cheated on me!'
"I'm sorry I did all of those things. But I'm being honest when I tell you this...I never meant to hurt you like that. Shit just happens. I've always loved you. Why else did I still talk to you?", he asked.
"Um, to piss that person off?"
Max shook his head and sighed. "No. I said I hated you. I never meant it. If a person hates someone, usually they won't talk to that person. I never hated you. Even though you hated me."
"Kiki hates me, she still talks to me.", I said.
He sighed. "She's a dumb cunt. I don't know why I'm with her. Especially...", his voice trailed off.
He called Kiki a dumb cunt. The boy has brains after all.
"Especially...what?", I asked.
He looked away, "Um, especially when I like someone else."
I sighed. "Brianne? Kate? Lyza?"
Max shook his head. "I don't like any of the hoe girls."
"Then who do you like then?"
Max went silent.
he pushed me against the lockers gently; he got closer to me.
"You really wanna know?", he asked, his face got closer to mine.
"Yes, very much.", I replied.
His lips pressed against mine; my whole body relaxed.
it reminded me of the first time me and him kissed.
I wrapped my arms around his neck and continued kissing him.
so wrong, so right.
It lasted for a long time.
till he pulled away from me.
we stared at each other for a long time.
"I shouldn't of done that.", Max said, looking down.
"Why?", I asked.
"Because of Kiki. I'm dating her."
I shrug ed. "She's a hoe. She does shit like that all the time."
He shook his head. "Sorry. But I just cheated on my girlfriend."
Max started walking away.
I watched him; the kiss felt so good, it actually felt like I was sober; even though I wasn't.
Did I actually like that feeling?