Nevermind Me

I figured it was for the best that Joe wasn’t trying to talk to me anymore. I mean that’s what I wanted right? For him to leave me alone and talk to Valerie. Yeah, I thought I did, too. I’m thinking that I miss our friend type relationship. He wasn’t bad now that I think of it, just too close for comfort sometimes. Now he was too far to say or do anything.

Although I don’t necessarily like to admit it, I’d rather be talking to Joe. It’s been a week. Tonight we were in Vegas, which was hotter than the pits of hell. I was wearing the coolest thing I could find, not daring to go out there in pants or sleeves.

“There’s a meeting going down in your mom’s room in five.” Nick said to me, plopping onto the couch in my room. I didn’t say anything because I didn’t have any idea what she needed to talk to us for. Meetings; this would be the first one. I wonder is she sensed how close Joe and Valerie were or if we weren’t talking. My mom hadn’t been much on a confident right now. She’s been busy, Teen Choice Awards were coming up and not only was she getting designs for the guys but for others like Vanessa Hudgens and Selena Gomez.

“Worried?” Nick mistook my quietness for weariness. I shook my head and looked at the window.

“No. I guess I’m…bored.” I shrugged, continuously staring out the window.

“It does get that way when Joe’s not around.” My head snapped around quickly so I could send him a sharp look.

“Why does he need to be brought up? It’s not like he’s a freaking creator of fun.” I mumbled, crossing my arms.

“Look, Jules I already know something happened with you two. I don’t know what, but I know it affected the both of you. He’s way too flirty and trying to mature at lightening speed and you’re back how you were at first.”

“I haven’t changed, Nick.” I objected.

“No, but you didtalk to me. Now you kind of stare off a lot.” I was quiet again before I asked him to confirm that.

“Really?” Was the whole Joe thing getting to me more than I even noticed myself? It was obvious enough to Nick; but he’s the most observant anyway. Had anyone else noticed how I can’t stand to see Valerie kiss Joe. Yeah, they’ve gotten there. Not full on make out sessions, but that’s only what I’ve seen so far. Thinking about more than that is horrible. Why? Don’t ask, because truthfully, I didn’t know.

Did I…like Joe myself? I’ve grown to…appreciate his company, when he did talk to me. He’s funny, cute, childish, dangerous, energetic, caring. Most things I wasn’t. Joseph Jonas and I, Juliet Monroe, are two complete opposites. Most likely, that’s why I deny him. Because it goes against everything for me to like a world wide superstar. And it’s completely unethical for him to want a supermodels average sister.

One thing I did know is that it was getting harder to keep myself away from Joe. Each day was worse, when he’d tell a joke and I had to act like I didn’t find it the funniest thing ever said. Or during conversations when we itched to answer each other’s comments but thought better of it. It’s horrible and redundant and I hate it.

“Yes, really. And unfortunately I don’t like it because to be brutally honest, I don’t like your sister.” He grimaced and I managed to laugh.

“Let me guess? You think she’s slutty? Easy? A skank? A bitch?” I threw each name that could be a synonym for Valerie Monroe out there.

“Pretty much.” He agreed nodding his head and I rolled my eyes.

“Might as well get over it or something. It doesn’t change, Nicholas. Just the way she is; can’t change the way someone is.” I said more to myself.

“Damn.” He cursed, shaking his head. “Whatever. I just wish she’d leave Joe alone with that. These are here for reasons.” He wriggled his ring finger and I smiled warmly.

“I have mine, too. Yeah, Valerie never even gave it a chance.” I showed him mine that sat on a chain around my neck.

“You guys really are polar opposites.” He concluded and I could only agree. It was true. Valerie, the model, was nothing close to Juliet, the dreamer.

“Knock, knock.” We heard Garbo say from the other side of the door.

“Coming.” I called for us both and lifted off the ground. We linked arms and followed the older guy to my mom’s suite to see what this so called meeting was about. Surprisingly, we were the last ones to arrive.

“Okay kiddies. Let’s chat.” My mom sat with her legs crossed, her white Versace dress fitting her figure while her legs crossed at the ankle. She sat her Chai tea on the glass table and smiled. “As you know, of course, we’re are in Las Vegas. Bright lights and fun. Aren’t you excited?” Her own eyes danced with excitement and I could only smile. I’d like to say that my mother isn’t half the bitch my sister is. She may be a little high maintenance at times, but her personality was definitely bubbly.

“Well I made a few calls and managed to get the clubs to let you guys in. We wanted you guys to have some limelight tonight. So after the concert put on some party clothes and get to the fun. Wherever you go they know the deal so don’t bother with intros. Flash the I.D and stride in.”

“Seriously, Ms. Monroe?” Joe gawked, clearly happy.

“Joe, I will have to punch you in the face if you keep calling me that. My name is Renee.” She threatened playfully and he smiled adorably. I caught my own smile before it could appear. Instead, I looked away at my mom.

“Mommy, Nick’s in right?” I asked her, grabbing Nick’s hand. As sad as it probably was, if I didn’t have Nick, I had no one.

“Of course, Baby. I wouldn’t keep him inside. Seems like you two are so alike anyway so that brings me to the next part. Staying together.

“You guys really shouldn’t and can’tgo out alone by yourselves. It’s not safe and really stupid and I barely got this past your parents boys so please just obey that one rule. So at least have one person with you or in close perimeter. Agreed?”

“Agreed.” We echoed, all smiles.

“Okay. So after you guys step off that stage, its time to party!” She threw her hands in the air and sported an excited smile. Everyone shared a laugh and we were free to go again.

&&

I have this thing. I love getting ready with a group of people. Everyone rushing around, putting on a little more eye shadow, or straightening their hair. I feel happy doing it. I feel a part of something.

“Julie.” Kevin called my name from where I was in the bathroom, curling my eyelashes. I put down the curler and rushed to through the connecting door to see what was up.

“Please?” He had a helpless smile as he held out his tie. “I usually have Dani help me but she’s somewhere with my mom and I’m hopeless at the moment.”

“Of course,” I laughed, taking the garment in my hand and fixing it properly.

“How do you know how to do that like, perfectly?” Nick asked, standing in front of me so I could fix his tie also.

“Well, it’s good to know little things like this.” I answered, smiling as I helped him.

“Yeah, or Kevin would be shit outta luck.” He muttered and I smacked his arm. I finished up Nick and saw Joe in his mirror, also attempting to fix his tie.

“Would you like me to help you, Joe?” I asked, sort of cautiously taking a furtive step. I wanted to help him. Or actually, just having him accept my presence would please me.

“No thank you, Juliet. I can do it.” He answered before letting out aggravated sigh as he failed to get it perfect again.

“You sure? I’m just trying to help.” I tried again.

“I can get Valerie.”

“She has no idea how to put on a tie Joe.” He stayed quiet until a sigh of defeat left his lips. I watched his eyes look into mine, looking somber. I wondered why. He said nothing but turned to face me so I could help, so I did.

“There.” I said more to myself, looking up to meet his eyes. “Need anything else?”

“Not that I can think of.” He said and Nick piped up.

“His hair.”

“No, Nicholas. I don’t.”

“Really? It looks like crap.”

“I don’t think it’s that bad.” I argued. Truthfully, I’ve never seen Joe’s hair look bad. Messy, but that’s the best.

“Of course you don’t.” Nick said, making me blush.

“I’m going to finish getting ready.” I excused myself and went back into my room to finish with my makeup and hair.

Twenty minutes later we all met in the hall, looking ready to take on a runway, not a look I went for often. “Ohhh, look at my Jewel. ” Garbo cooed, hugging me. I blushed immensely when he said I looked hot, causing the others (except Joe) to agree. He did stare at my with a certain look in his eyes. When I looked back it ended and he went over to Valerie, whispering in her ear.

“I don’t know if you realized this, but he does this to make you jealous,” Nick whispered in my ear, gesturing towards the couple. That made sense, right? Joe constantly ignored me and always had Valerie by his side. I noticed the looks he sends my way when they’re together. Sort of smug and it’s like a shot to my chest. Like he knows I care, but he won’t dare say anything to me because Imessed up. Like this separation was myfault. And I didn’t know whether I agreed with his argument or not.

I’m not the type to fight back so I just take it and keep doing what I’m doing. Revenge wasn’t in my vocabulary because I’ve never felt it was necessary. But Joe was being rude. So rude to me of my refusal to kiss him. Was that fair? Could he blame me for doing what we both know was right?

Was jealousy the game we were playing? I’ll let myself think that. I mean, there he was with my sister wrapped around him. “C’mon! We’re goin’ out tonight” I linked arms with Nick and a new smile was on my face. Time to test these theories of jealousy tonight.

&&

We walked down the street, laughing and catching stares. I’m sure people obviously noticed the boys, which is why I was linked with Danielle right now. It would probably be strange for Nick and I to be seen like a couple since I’m the age of nineteen.

“It’s so hot,” she sighed and I laughed, agreeing. Summer weather on the west coast was always this way. I would go as far as to say it was in the hundreds at 10:30 at night. The MGM Grand is where we were headed for Studio 54.

“I know. I didn’t think it got like this at night.”

“Seriously. Looks like your sister hates it also.” She giggled so I looked back to see Valerie fanning her face with her clutch. She pushed Joe away so more air could get to her, which made me laugh a little. “Her and Joe are…together?”

“I…I guess.” My shoulders shrugged, not being sure myself.

“Wow. That’s fast. It would be okay if it were anyone but Valerie. She’s not Joe’s…type. Or at least I thought. No offense!” She put her hands up in defense

“Yeah. That’s what everyone’s saying. And don’t worry; I already know Val’s no one nice. It doesn’t make a difference coming from someone else’s mouth anymore.”

“To be truthful, I’d rather him and you together.” She whispered with a smile I could only return. The thought of me and Joe together. Wait, no! Me and Joe being friends. For us to talk and laugh together again; that’s what I wanted.

“Looks like he’s playing the jealousy game.” Why is it that everyone can realize that before me? The thought of him making me jealous just came to me like, twenty minutes ago. And I’mthe smart one.

&&

I was completely out of place in this club; any club. It’s like a stick of celery in a land of ice cream sundaes. But maybe it was only like that on the inside because from the looks I got, I was just perfect among the crowd. I was perched up on a stool by the bar, receiving many offers to buy me drinks, each time making me blush. Especially when the guy called me ‘Beautiful’ or something. I wasn’t used to so much attention, it made me feel even more weirded out.

“Aren’t you quite adored” Nick came to sit next to me. I hadn’t seen him for a while, wondering what he could be up to in here. “Anymore compliments and that blush will give you away.”

“Be quiet. I can see you’re blushing too.” I touched his cheek and he got redder. “What were you doing?”

“Um. Dancing.” He answered, rubbing his neck and I laughed, imagining it.

“Sorry. I just didn’t think of you as a dancer.”

“I’m not. Garbo dragged me out there. Some girl tried to practically screw me right there so I left. She reminded me of Valerie.”

I had to stop laughing to respond. Some girl trying to take his pants off reminded him of my sister, what else is new?

“Where are those two anyway?” I asked, because we both knew Valerie was all over Joe.

“Right there,” He pointed and when I saw them, my cheeks flamed just by looking. Dry sex is the only way to describe what the hell they looked like. I didn’t know whether to be jealous or embarrassed. I watched Joe’s hip and had to turn away before I’d start feeling something borderline of attraction.

“Um, okay.” I muttered turning back around. “Not something I wanted to see.”

“Jealous?”

“Yes.” Let’s see where honesty gets me tonight.

“Oh. So what will you do about it?”

“Absolutely nothing.”

“Nice, Juliet.” He rolled his eyes. But what was there for me to do? He hated me for leaving him hanging like that and I was torn between what to feel. Should I feel bad for hurting his feelings? Should I be mad he’s using my sister to make me jealous? Should I be sad we aren’t talking? Or should I be happy he wants nothing to do with me? It was too much.

“Excuse me. I’m going to the bathroom” I gently hopped off the stool, straightening out my skirt and going to the restroom I made sure I sought out earlier. After I was done, I was perhaps six steps out before some guy appeared in front of me. He was gorgeous, to be blunt.

“Hey,” He actually smiled at me, his voice a little breath taken most likely from dancing.

“Hi,” I smiled shyly, returning his greeting.

“Would you like to go somewhere with me?” He offered, his hand finding a place in mine. I didn’t know what to say. Of course I couldn’t leave with him, he was twenty four tops. But his eyes were a amazing grayish blue and that smile, oh that smile. I knew I couldn’t but I wanted to.

“I’m sorry I can’t” I told him.

“C’mon, Hun. Let’s have some fun.” Yeah, gorgeous went out the window as he tugged on my arm roughly.

“I said I couldn’t now could you let go?” My voice was starting to fail me which was scary. I’ve never been in any situation like this. Would he leave me alone? Or manage to get me out of here unseen?

“I don’t think she wants to go with you, Dipshit.” The venom in his voice made my stomach drop further. I knew that voice so well I didn’t need any confirmation.

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah, she’s my girlfriend; I think I’d know.” That got the creep to loose my hand and walk off without another word. Confusion stirred through me. Was he over it? Is this the unsaid truce I was waiting for?

“Having fun?” Okay, I thought I wanted an unspoken truce. No, I felt guilty and I needed to apologize.

“Joe I’m sorry” I piped up, quickly causing him to look at me.

“Huh?”

“I’m sorry. I should have never let it happen like that and it wasn’t smart or wise of me to-“

“I just want to know why, Juliet.” He cut me off and looking into my eyes. With the look he gave me he could get me to say anything. With a deep sigh I confessed why I had to keep my distance from him.

“Because Joe. I can’t get in the way. You are supposed to be with Valerie, it just happens like that. It always has. She likes you and I’m not supposed to touch that. I’m supposed to sit back, like I always do, and let her have her fun.”

“Juliet, that’s crazy.”

“That’s the way it is.” I shrugged.

“Do you want it that way?”

“Doesn’t matter. I don’t want it like this though.” By now my back was against the wall and we were close. I noted that but kept my mind in our conversation. Things needed to be said, the way his lips moved could wait.

“So what doyou want?”

“I want us to be friends. It’s all I’m asking.”

“What if I want more than that?” My breath hitched as he asked that question. There were so many answers I could’ve said. One I was dying to say. It would be okay because I want the same thing….

“It would be too bad. Please don’t make this harder than it has to be.” I begged.

“Fine. Friends” He pulled me close to his body in a crushing embrace. “Miss me?”

“Yeah, actually.” I laughed and I knew he was smirking.

“Same here. So, now that we’re friends,” He released his grip to twist me around in a full spin, “I can tell you that you look killer right now.”

My cheeks turned red and I was glad it was dark in here. “Thanks.”

“Anytime. Wanna dance?”

“No, thanks.” I replied quickly, making him laugh at me like he already knew the answer.

“Fine. See you later, Julie. Watch yourself” His lips left a kiss on my cheek and he left. That kiss left a burning mark there for the rest of the night.