Nevermind Me

“I wanted to give these to you alone,” I handed him a box. He smiled, taking it in his hands. “Open it up.”

His fingers lifted the lid, exposing all the different color pieces. He took one out and examined it.

“And I’ll be there forever and a day” He read. “Bon Jovi?”

“Always” I smiled, nodding my head. “They have lyrics from my favorite songs on them. Some have pictures and such, too.”

“This is pretty cool, Jules.” He was so cute, smiling as he went through them.

“Thanks, Nicholas, although it’s just some guitar picks; nothing extravagant. I got a chain, too. In case you wanted to wear some.” I sat down on his bed and watched him. “I figured if you guys didn’t want to talk to me, I’d say my mom got the gifts or something.”

“Yeah, right. I know a Juliet gift when I see one. Everyone does now. Jamiaca, Jules? That’s crazy.” He was referring to Kevin and Danielle’s gift. Well, they did just get married; they should have time to themselves. “Plus, we would miss you too much to not want you hear. We love you, no matter what.”

“I thought it was nice. I paid for most of it.” I shrugged. “I’ve been working like crazy this month.” I laughed.

“Where?”

“Record stores, I was my mom’s assistant for a few weeks and that big bucks. I do volunteer work, too. Whatever keeps me busy.”

“What happened to college?”

“Well, I’ve been touring with the Jonas Brothers,” I teased. “I’ll be attending in the Summer. Hopefully no more hang ups happen.”

“But we’re touring next summer” Nick objected.

“Don’t think I’ll be there,” I sighed. He frowned, not speaking. Instead, he came to sit next to me on the bed, leaning his head on my shoulder.

“We’ll miss you, you know. All of us. A lot.”

“I know.” I nodded, bringing my hand around to toy with his curls.

“Especially Joe.”

“I know.” I sighed, kissing the top of his head and staring out of the window.

[&&]

I sighed, looking at myself in the full length mirror. Christmas Dinner tonight. ‘Dress to the nines’ were Denise’s words, complimented with a wink.

I examined the red dress I had on. It was strapless and ruffled sort of at the bottom. I thought it was really cute, just a bit short. I put on leggings and, to take away from it’s length, I put a lacey bow in my hair, making it look more cute instead.

“You look fine, Baby” Julian came and wrapped his arms around me as he stood behind me. He kissed my neck and looked at our reflection. I did the same, sighing.

I’d made a split decision to be with Julian. He was telling me I was in love with Joe and I didn’t want to hear it anymore. I didn’t want people to think Joe and I were close. So in a way, I had used Julian.

It felt horrible saying that. Julian was a great guy; everything you could ask for. But once we became a couple, he just wasn’t what I wanted. We were comfortable, not romantic. Friends was the best we could be. But I made my bed, so now I had to lie in it.

“Let’s get downstairs” I told him, taking hold of his hand and leading him downstairs. I smiled, seeing the beautiful dinner Denise prepared.

We all were in red, green, or black; all coordinating. Of course, Nicholas, Joe, and I were matching. And of course a picture needed to be taken.

“You look like a little kid,” Nick teased, touching my bow. I blushed, pinching his cheek.

“Whatever. I’m still older than you”

“It was a compliment. Sort of. You just look cute in your little dress and bow; ha, like a doll baby.”

“Well, you look nice, too. You too, Joe.” I muttered. I knew I shouldn’t even acknowledge Joe while I was here, find a way to stay away from him; I just couldn’t find myself doing that. To justify my action I went around the table to sit next to Danielle. After scooting up to the table, I looked up, locking eyes with Joe. Quickly, I looked away, thinking about what he’d told me this morning. My stomach fluttered.

Tonight.

Was this a trick to get me alone? We couldn’t risk being caught alone; I was supposed to be doing the exact opposite by avoiding him.

The next thing I knew, Joe was seated next to me. I couldn’t hide the shock on my face. I know he knew I sat on the other side of the table for a reason. Julian sat next to Joe, and Valerie next to Julian. Nicholas took a seat across from me, shooting me a knowing look. I nodded, acknowledging it. It wasn’t myfault.

I sighed, looking down at my empty plate. I jumped with the feeling of a hand on my thigh. Even if it was wrong, it didn’t feel that way. I knew I couldn’t pull his hand away, it’d become to obvious. Instead, I sat with my mouth in a tight smile, cracking my knuckles and trying to act like Joe’s hot little hand wasn’t rubbing circles on my leg.

“Let us say grace.”

Yes, let us.

&&

Dinner was over, luckily for me. It was so hot in there. Looking around, it might’ve only been me. My mom was actually cold. I would most honestly blame that on Joe. He wouldn’t let me be through the whole dinner. And I was so anxious that someone would catch on, I didn’t even breath his way. It was bittersweet agony; if you could even call it that.

The problem now though, was still Joe related. Was he still trying to talk to me tonight? I thought about what he’d told me this morning again. We didn’t have any time to question any of it; too risky. All the things he could possibly give me ran through my mind, each one making my stomach churn. Nervous wouldn’t cover how I felt. I tried to convince myself that Joe was just saying things; he’d probably just tried to trip me up. It’s happened before.

Once I had on a nightshirt, I acknowledged Julian. “I’m going to get some water.”

“Kay.” He nodded, getting into bed. I walked out of the door, into the dark hallway. Feeling my way around, I found the banister and held onto as I went down the stairs. I didn’t want to wake everyone with the lights, or at least the ones who were already sleep.

Once I got down the stairs, I managed to get into the kitchen before I was stopped. His hand grabbed me by my waist and I shivered involuntarily. It was getting to the point of his every touch giving me butterflies. I let out a shaky breath.

“Joe…”

“I…I have something for you, Juliet.” He said softly. I turned around to face him, reluctantly putting distance between us.

“Joe, we should talk” I said and before I even finished, he was shaking his head.

“I don’t want to talk. Always ruins everything” He muttered, coming closer to me. I pulled away.

“We need to.” I pleaded.

“Fine, Juliet. Let’s talk about why you’re with him” His whole demeanor changed. He said the words rudely but his face showed hurt. I got quiet while he searched my face for an answer.

“I don’t know,” I muttered before thinking, “But why does it matter? It’s not like I have anyone.”

“So he’s your last resort?” He accused.

“That’s not what I’m saying” I answered quickly, almost forgetting to keep my voice down.

“So you love him?”

“Drop it.” I demanded, surprising us both.

“I just want to know”

“Well I’ll be going then” I tried to push past him but he grabbed my arm, pulling me back.

“Stay” He said simply, his eyes focused on me.

“Why?” I asked rudely, trying to jerk my arm away.

“Because I want you to” Was his simple answer. I felt useless, knowing that was all I needed to stay. My arm slumped and he took my hand, guiding me over to the back door. He opened it, walking us into the cold air.

“Why are we- ”

“I have something to give you.” He interrupted me. Digging in his jacket pocket, he pulled out a necklace. I tried to get a good look at it in the dark. It was a necklace, gold with turquoise beads, it seemed. I shivered, trying not to let the cold get to me out here.

“It’s hand made from Peru. The woman who made it used to be an artist.” He explained. “Turn around.”

I did so, feeling him place the necklace around my neck, clasping it together. When I turned back around, my fingers were playing with a round piece in the middle of it. I took a closer look at it, my eyes widening.

“Recognize it?” he smirked, pulling his necklace I’d gotten him for his birthday out his shirt.

“How’d you get---Huh?” I smiled, holding them both, seeing that they were the same.

“Wanted it to be special. Now it is”

“Thank you, Joe. It’s beautiful” I whispered into his neck as I hugged him. When I released slightly, I couldn’t escape his brown eyes. They locked onto mine, serious and intent.

“Don’t run away from me tonight,” He said, his voice barely a whisper. My breath faltered as I stared into his eyes, not speaking. My lips parted and I held him closer. It was like a feeling I could never reach finally attained. The fast pumping of my heart and the flutter of my stomach fed a fire that was burning within me. I slipped my arms into Joe's jacket, around his back, kissing the exposed part of his neck.

“Stay” He said, before pressing his lips to mine.