The New Beginning
Confesion
I looked up. He had heart pj's on, No not boxers, pj's. He smiled at me and came over and moved my feet and sat next to me.
"Can't sleep?" he asked.
"No, I'm asleep, you're just dreaming," I said,
He nodded.
"Worried about tomorrow?" he asked. I nodded and sat up. Gerard was just about the only person I could talk to. I don't trust anyone else.
"Gerard what if they can't help me? What if I never get my memory back." I asked.
He shrugged
"Your uncle will disown you, we'll deny ever meeting you, you'll become an orphan and get kicked out of the orphanage at eightteen become a prostitute, and die a slow painful death from aids at the age of twenty two."
I looked up at him. I knew he was kidding but it didn't make me feel any better.
"I'm just kiding. You'll just go on living like you do now, except not on tour with us, you just won't rember your life before us," he said
"But I don't want to live like this, not rembering my life before all this," I said as my eyes began to water.
"I want to rember," I said as a tear dropped on the blankets. I came next to him, and he put an arm around me.
" We want you to rember to," he said quietly.
"But if there's nothing they can do, then there's nothing they can do," he said. As much as I didn't want to believe it he was right. I buried my face on his shoulder crying silently.
"I want to rember my dog, I want to rember my mom, I want to rember my friends. And i want to miss my dad because I rember him and miss him. I don't want to cry about him becaue I know I should," I sobbed. He hugged me in his arms.
I breathed in deeply, inhaling his scent. Mint, unwashed clothes, aftershave, and cigarettes. It felt good to be hugged by someone and cry. It felt good to get all the stress out. Now I was crying because it just felt so good.
"Don't worry about it Rox. When you go back to school you'll make new friends. Just brag about us and I'm sure you'll be the most popular girl in school with the emo's and rockers."
I looked up at him and we both laughed. He wiped a tear off my cheek.
"No more crying kay?" he asked.
I nodded. But I knew these were just the begining of my tears. He kissed my forehead and went back to his room. I snuggled back onto the couch and pulled the blankets up and layed my head on the pillow. I dozed off once but woke up around five.
I went outside and watched the sun rise. A lizard was across the street, trying to warm itself up before the hawks woke up. As the sun rose it warmed my face. I sighed heavily. Even if I didn't get my memory back, the world would still spin. Everyone will continue their lives and soon forget about the teen who got to live with My Chemical Romance for two months. The only world that would end was mine, I wasn't suicidal about it but my old world would come to an end.
I twitched my nose as the wind blew. It was turning to fall and it was getting colder. My last day here with the guys would be Halloween.
"Can't sleep?" he asked.
"No, I'm asleep, you're just dreaming," I said,
He nodded.
"Worried about tomorrow?" he asked. I nodded and sat up. Gerard was just about the only person I could talk to. I don't trust anyone else.
"Gerard what if they can't help me? What if I never get my memory back." I asked.
He shrugged
"Your uncle will disown you, we'll deny ever meeting you, you'll become an orphan and get kicked out of the orphanage at eightteen become a prostitute, and die a slow painful death from aids at the age of twenty two."
I looked up at him. I knew he was kidding but it didn't make me feel any better.
"I'm just kiding. You'll just go on living like you do now, except not on tour with us, you just won't rember your life before us," he said
"But I don't want to live like this, not rembering my life before all this," I said as my eyes began to water.
"I want to rember," I said as a tear dropped on the blankets. I came next to him, and he put an arm around me.
" We want you to rember to," he said quietly.
"But if there's nothing they can do, then there's nothing they can do," he said. As much as I didn't want to believe it he was right. I buried my face on his shoulder crying silently.
"I want to rember my dog, I want to rember my mom, I want to rember my friends. And i want to miss my dad because I rember him and miss him. I don't want to cry about him becaue I know I should," I sobbed. He hugged me in his arms.
I breathed in deeply, inhaling his scent. Mint, unwashed clothes, aftershave, and cigarettes. It felt good to be hugged by someone and cry. It felt good to get all the stress out. Now I was crying because it just felt so good.
"Don't worry about it Rox. When you go back to school you'll make new friends. Just brag about us and I'm sure you'll be the most popular girl in school with the emo's and rockers."
I looked up at him and we both laughed. He wiped a tear off my cheek.
"No more crying kay?" he asked.
I nodded. But I knew these were just the begining of my tears. He kissed my forehead and went back to his room. I snuggled back onto the couch and pulled the blankets up and layed my head on the pillow. I dozed off once but woke up around five.
I went outside and watched the sun rise. A lizard was across the street, trying to warm itself up before the hawks woke up. As the sun rose it warmed my face. I sighed heavily. Even if I didn't get my memory back, the world would still spin. Everyone will continue their lives and soon forget about the teen who got to live with My Chemical Romance for two months. The only world that would end was mine, I wasn't suicidal about it but my old world would come to an end.
I twitched my nose as the wind blew. It was turning to fall and it was getting colder. My last day here with the guys would be Halloween.