Welcome to a New Kind of Tension
Body Snatchers
"YOU WILL NOT KILL MEEEEEEE!" roared the oversized Adrienne/alien.
"Look Adie, I'm sorry!" Billie started.
"SHUT UP, SILLY MORTAL!" Adrienne/alien growled.
"What are you talking about? You're mortal, too!" Max yelled, laughing.
"WHAT?" Adie/alien asked.
"Yeah, immortal means you'll never die...don't you guys watch Doctor Who?" Max yelled back.
"Max, I don't think they have Doctor Who in space!" Mike informed.
"Well what about Harry Potter cuz that little fuzzy haired chick knows it all!" Max grinned.
"NOPE!" replied A/A.
"Can we get back on topic here.....hey, where's Tre?" Billie asked.
"I'm here, can't you see me....am I going invisible?" Tre asked. They turned and sure enough he was disappearing, half his body was gone.
"Holy crap! they all yell.
"HA MY DEFENCE MECHANISM, YOU'LL ALL DISINTEGRATE! MWAHAHAHAHAHA!"
"Not today bitch, you're going down......" Max yelled. "HEY DIESEL, GET YOUR ASS IN HERE NOW!"
"Ohhhh, yes sir!" Vin replied, giddily thinking he was getting some ass.
He drove in on a big JCB and dumped a bonfire of weed on the floor.
"Flame throwers units NOWWWWW!" Max yelled into a walkie talkie.
The people in every town and city set alight the bonfire "a" weed, just as Billie, Mike and Tre did.
"YOU'RE GASSING ME? FOOLISH MORTALS!" A/A yelled.
"Oh yeah, and about that immortal thing you think you've got going for you....I'm about to prove you wrong...DIE BITCH, DIE...MR WEED HAS COME ALIVE...AND HE'S FEELING REALLY HIGH!"
"WAAAAAAAAAAAA...OWWWWWWWWW. I'M CHOKING TO DEATH!"
There was a huge explosion as the alien blew up.
"ADIEEEEEEEEEEE!" Billie yelled as Tre dived on him to save him from a flying eye ball. When things had quieted down, Billie jumped up and ran through the smoke, closely followed by Mike.
"Adie? ADIE?" Billie yelled.
"B...Billie.. Billie, is that you?
She looked up to see a small man walk through the smoke all slow motion like Robin Hood after his camp is torched!
Billie turned to see a small feminine sexy and slime covered figure lying on the floor.
"Oh, Adrienne, you're alive!" Billie yelled, scooping her up into his arms.
Adie looked up at him and smiled, then slapped him across the face.
"Ow! What was that for?"
"That was for not noticing things sooner...like when I didn't want to have sex with you the night before all this happened because I said it was inappropriate!"
"That was because I thought you were being all womanly and feminine!"
"And this..." Adrienne said, kissing him... "Is for saving me!"
"Oh yeah, DAMN RIGHT!" Billie said, kissing her again.
"This is a weird fight!" Mike said. "Damn Armstrongs!" he tutted and walked off.
"Tre? Hey Tre, where are you?" Mike called out.
"Over here, dude!" A puny squeaky voice called out through the smoke.
Mike walked over and there was Tre and Max sitting in the path of the smoke from the bonfire doing "inhale deep" breathing exercises.
"Oh, I see you have your body back!" Mike said.
"Oh yeah, and it's still as good as it used to be, except I've got these really weird man boobs now!" Tre remarked, looking down his t-shirt.
"Tre...you always had those!" Mike replied in a whisper.
"Oh yeah, and do you spy on me when I'm in the shower?"
"No, they show through your t-shirt!" Mike retorted.
"Dude, I'm so gonna write 'The one and only way to kill a Love-Hating Alien!'"
"Well Max, at least it's not one thousand or you could have a problem!" Mike replied.
"Hey Vin!" Tre called out.
"Yes Tre," Vin replied.
"We don't need you anymore!" Tre replied.
"Yeah, piss off back to gays-ville!" Max sniggered.
Tre laughed, "Yeah he's....The only gay in the villaggee!" Tre joked with the mock gay voice and he and Max burst out laughing.
Billie walked through the smoke with Adrienne in his arms (you can't see his face so he looks all slow motion and mysterious).
"Dude is that? That's Tom Cruise, right?" Max wonders.
"Yeah, sexy Tom Cruise carrying his woman to safety!" Tre replied.
Billie trips and Adrienne goes flying...they land in a heap on the floor.
"Ah....maybe not!" Tre remarked and took another deep breath.
"No, I agree..." Max agreed and did the same.
"Well, I just got words the kids and the rest of the world are okay!" Mike said, holding the walkie talkie.
"Oh good, we can go home then!" Billie replied.
"Awwww, do we have to, can't we just hang out here?" Tre asked, breathing deeply.
"NO!" Mike and Billie said at the same time.
"Hey, what's that noise?"
"Ohhhhhh.... President Bush.... Ohhhh, you little Bush Kangaroooo.....Ohhhhh!"
"Sounds like Vin!"
TWO MONTHS LATER.
"Mmmmmm, Ohhhhhhh, Adie....haaa....haaa.....AHHHHHHHH!" Billie screamed with orgasmic joy.
"HMMMM, that felt good!" Adie replied,
"Yeah, thank the lord above for that!" Billie remarked.
"Ya know, I'm hungry!" Billie added.
"You're always hungry after sex!" Adie said, getting out of bed and pulling her dressing gown on.
"Hmmmm, what could I have... muffins... weiners... twinkies...corn dogs!"
"No no no, Billie, darling, those are bad for your teeth, best eat something with a little more nutritionist value, like baked alaska...bon appetite?"
"WHAT....THE...FUCK..?" Billie said in horror.
Adie began laughing, "Naaa just kidding, no aliens here today!" Billie laughed along with her and pulled her onto the bed. "It's not food I'm hungry for...it's YOU!" he screamed and Adie laughed.
MEANWHILE IN SPACE
"Where shall we go now?" Alien number one asks.
"We could go to the sun!" Alien two replies.
"Ha, yeah, let's go to the sun!" Alien Three, four, and five screamed.
"Yeah, I've always wanted to go to the sun!" Alien six cries.
"Capitano... Full speed toward the sun!" Alien one says.
"Right you are Ally boy, to the sun we're headed."
BILLIES BEDROOM
"Ahhhhhhhhh...sweet orgasms!" Billie relaxed as Adie rolled off him for the twentieth time.
"Aren't you tired yet cus I am!" she said.
"Yeah, let's sleep!"
The phone rings.....
"Hello? Oh hey Tre...what's that? Look out the window!"
They look out and see a large flamey explosion in the sun.
"Whatever that was, it shouldn't have gone so close to the sun!" Billie retorted, hanging up the phone and settling down with Adrienne in their majorly big and worn springs bed!
"Look Adie, I'm sorry!" Billie started.
"SHUT UP, SILLY MORTAL!" Adrienne/alien growled.
"What are you talking about? You're mortal, too!" Max yelled, laughing.
"WHAT?" Adie/alien asked.
"Yeah, immortal means you'll never die...don't you guys watch Doctor Who?" Max yelled back.
"Max, I don't think they have Doctor Who in space!" Mike informed.
"Well what about Harry Potter cuz that little fuzzy haired chick knows it all!" Max grinned.
"NOPE!" replied A/A.
"Can we get back on topic here.....hey, where's Tre?" Billie asked.
"I'm here, can't you see me....am I going invisible?" Tre asked. They turned and sure enough he was disappearing, half his body was gone.
"Holy crap! they all yell.
"HA MY DEFENCE MECHANISM, YOU'LL ALL DISINTEGRATE! MWAHAHAHAHAHA!"
"Not today bitch, you're going down......" Max yelled. "HEY DIESEL, GET YOUR ASS IN HERE NOW!"
"Ohhhh, yes sir!" Vin replied, giddily thinking he was getting some ass.
He drove in on a big JCB and dumped a bonfire of weed on the floor.
"Flame throwers units NOWWWWW!" Max yelled into a walkie talkie.
The people in every town and city set alight the bonfire "a" weed, just as Billie, Mike and Tre did.
"YOU'RE GASSING ME? FOOLISH MORTALS!" A/A yelled.
"Oh yeah, and about that immortal thing you think you've got going for you....I'm about to prove you wrong...DIE BITCH, DIE...MR WEED HAS COME ALIVE...AND HE'S FEELING REALLY HIGH!"
"WAAAAAAAAAAAA...OWWWWWWWWW. I'M CHOKING TO DEATH!"
There was a huge explosion as the alien blew up.
"ADIEEEEEEEEEEE!" Billie yelled as Tre dived on him to save him from a flying eye ball. When things had quieted down, Billie jumped up and ran through the smoke, closely followed by Mike.
"Adie? ADIE?" Billie yelled.
"B...Billie.. Billie, is that you?
She looked up to see a small man walk through the smoke all slow motion like Robin Hood after his camp is torched!
Billie turned to see a small feminine sexy and slime covered figure lying on the floor.
"Oh, Adrienne, you're alive!" Billie yelled, scooping her up into his arms.
Adie looked up at him and smiled, then slapped him across the face.
"Ow! What was that for?"
"That was for not noticing things sooner...like when I didn't want to have sex with you the night before all this happened because I said it was inappropriate!"
"That was because I thought you were being all womanly and feminine!"
"And this..." Adrienne said, kissing him... "Is for saving me!"
"Oh yeah, DAMN RIGHT!" Billie said, kissing her again.
"This is a weird fight!" Mike said. "Damn Armstrongs!" he tutted and walked off.
"Tre? Hey Tre, where are you?" Mike called out.
"Over here, dude!" A puny squeaky voice called out through the smoke.
Mike walked over and there was Tre and Max sitting in the path of the smoke from the bonfire doing "inhale deep" breathing exercises.
"Oh, I see you have your body back!" Mike said.
"Oh yeah, and it's still as good as it used to be, except I've got these really weird man boobs now!" Tre remarked, looking down his t-shirt.
"Tre...you always had those!" Mike replied in a whisper.
"Oh yeah, and do you spy on me when I'm in the shower?"
"No, they show through your t-shirt!" Mike retorted.
"Dude, I'm so gonna write 'The one and only way to kill a Love-Hating Alien!'"
"Well Max, at least it's not one thousand or you could have a problem!" Mike replied.
"Hey Vin!" Tre called out.
"Yes Tre," Vin replied.
"We don't need you anymore!" Tre replied.
"Yeah, piss off back to gays-ville!" Max sniggered.
Tre laughed, "Yeah he's....The only gay in the villaggee!" Tre joked with the mock gay voice and he and Max burst out laughing.
Billie walked through the smoke with Adrienne in his arms (you can't see his face so he looks all slow motion and mysterious).
"Dude is that? That's Tom Cruise, right?" Max wonders.
"Yeah, sexy Tom Cruise carrying his woman to safety!" Tre replied.
Billie trips and Adrienne goes flying...they land in a heap on the floor.
"Ah....maybe not!" Tre remarked and took another deep breath.
"No, I agree..." Max agreed and did the same.
"Well, I just got words the kids and the rest of the world are okay!" Mike said, holding the walkie talkie.
"Oh good, we can go home then!" Billie replied.
"Awwww, do we have to, can't we just hang out here?" Tre asked, breathing deeply.
"NO!" Mike and Billie said at the same time.
"Hey, what's that noise?"
"Ohhhhhh.... President Bush.... Ohhhh, you little Bush Kangaroooo.....Ohhhhh!"
"Sounds like Vin!"
TWO MONTHS LATER.
"Mmmmmm, Ohhhhhhh, Adie....haaa....haaa.....AHHHHHHHH!" Billie screamed with orgasmic joy.
"HMMMM, that felt good!" Adie replied,
"Yeah, thank the lord above for that!" Billie remarked.
"Ya know, I'm hungry!" Billie added.
"You're always hungry after sex!" Adie said, getting out of bed and pulling her dressing gown on.
"Hmmmm, what could I have... muffins... weiners... twinkies...corn dogs!"
"No no no, Billie, darling, those are bad for your teeth, best eat something with a little more nutritionist value, like baked alaska...bon appetite?"
"WHAT....THE...FUCK..?" Billie said in horror.
Adie began laughing, "Naaa just kidding, no aliens here today!" Billie laughed along with her and pulled her onto the bed. "It's not food I'm hungry for...it's YOU!" he screamed and Adie laughed.
MEANWHILE IN SPACE
"Where shall we go now?" Alien number one asks.
"We could go to the sun!" Alien two replies.
"Ha, yeah, let's go to the sun!" Alien Three, four, and five screamed.
"Yeah, I've always wanted to go to the sun!" Alien six cries.
"Capitano... Full speed toward the sun!" Alien one says.
"Right you are Ally boy, to the sun we're headed."
BILLIES BEDROOM
"Ahhhhhhhhh...sweet orgasms!" Billie relaxed as Adie rolled off him for the twentieth time.
"Aren't you tired yet cus I am!" she said.
"Yeah, let's sleep!"
The phone rings.....
"Hello? Oh hey Tre...what's that? Look out the window!"
They look out and see a large flamey explosion in the sun.
"Whatever that was, it shouldn't have gone so close to the sun!" Billie retorted, hanging up the phone and settling down with Adrienne in their majorly big and worn springs bed!