False Pretense

The weeks had passed by a bit quicker than I was anticipating. I was to be moving into my dorm tomorrow. Tomorrow! I couldn't believe it. My life was finally going to be starting and I was the one who had control over it now. It was quite an uneasy feeling, to be honest.

I mean, sure, I was looking forward to being away from my neurotic and controlling mother. But, then, what else did I know? For the past nine months I had developed into this false persona and I didn't know where the fake Katryne ended and the real one started any longer. Well, I had nobody to impress and make happy anymore, so maybe I would fall back into my old character over time. Or did I have now a whole plethora of people to impress and make happy?

I sat down on the end of my bed, all this thinking was making my head spin. My cat, Sassy, purred her way into my lap and I was grateful she'd be the one familiar thing in my hectic new life.

"Are you finished packing?" My mother poked her head in my doorway, without knocking, as usual.

"Just about." I stood up from where I was sitting and started folding the clothes that were scattered on my bed. Sassy fell to my side and jumped up onto the window banister to soak in some sun.

"Good girl." And she was gone. Just like that.

~ ~ ~

Mike and I were doing shots at our booth at our other hang-out, 924 Gilman Street.

"Traci gets her new roomie tomorrow." Mike slurred, slamming his shot glass onto the recycled plastic tabletop. I shot my head back as I did another; two ahead of him.

"So? It's not like they're going to be best friends or some shit. Your girlfriend is kind of annoying, Mike, and if the girl has any sense at all, she'll see that." I shot my head back again and Mike rolled his eyes, pouring more tequila into his glass.

"You're such an asshole, Bill. What happened?" I rolled my eyes and smirked at my best friend.

"If I were so bad you wouldn't be hanging out with me." Mike rolled his eyes this time, shooting his head back as he devoured the alcohol. My head was spinning and I knew if I attempted to walk at this point I would fall over.

"I've known you since we were ten, Bill. I've seen all your stages of emotion but I gotta say, this anger stage is the worst. Stupid Ashley, if you two were still together..." He stopped talking once he saw the anger that was residing on my features.

"This has nothing to do with that bitch!" I hissed, grabbing the bottle of tequila instead of pouring it into my glass.

"You're unhappy, BJ." He smiled halfheartedly and took the tequila out of my grasp.

"Well no shit! Anybody can tell just by looking at me." I dropped my head into my hands and grabbed at my hair.

"What's up, bud? What's causing this?"

"I don't know! It's just a lot worse lately, because believe me, I've always known I was an asshole...but it's just so much worse lately." Mike laughed lightly as he poured me a shot and I looked up at him.

"It wasn't like this when you were with Ashley. I didn't see you two fight once." I grabbed the bottle again and took a swig.

"It has nothing to do with that two-timing bitch!" I yelled, standing up from the table.

"Bill, where are you going?" I steadied myself with the table and glared over at Mike.

"I'm leaving! I don't need your accusation shit every time we're together. Fuck this." I unsteadily made my way through the crowd of people as some horrible punk band performed.

~ ~ ~

I couldn't sleep that night. My mind was reeling with different possibilities of how tomorrow was going to go. I kind of hoped my new roommate would be social and just befriend me and I'd have to side-step the process of finding friends myself. God, I am pathetic.

Sassy jumped onto the couch, which is where I had to sleep since my bed was covered in boxes. She laid down on my stomach and I started petting her.

"You're excited, right Sassy?" She just purred as she snuggled into my stomach.

"Good, so am I."