Remember the Time

FOUR
Michael
Who would have guessed that John Howard would play such an important part in my life? In November of 1988 I was free of appointments so daddy decided it was time for us to go on vacation he picked to go to Kenya and I agreed, I’ve been in so much places doing shoots, secretly trying to keep me busy and away from Michael. Because after my incident in the party he was if possible quieter, if he barely spoke to me, now he wouldn’t dare to look at me and I was embarrassed, because I missed the way his eyes bored into mine, I missed how my name slipped out of his mouth and sounded so beautiful, I missed him.
So the day we were leaving daddy said he had to do something first, and I waited him in the car, I put on my sun glasses and tried to get some sleep, since the picking of my clothes left me exhausted, I don’t remember quite well if dad came back to the car, the only thing I remember is someone tapping at my window, I opened my eyes and I was glad I had the glasses on otherwise Michael would have seen my eyes widening, I rolled down the window and greeted him, his shiny smile flashed across his face.
The tabloids have been saying that he was changing his face too much, I never cared, to me he still was the best looking man I’ve ever seen, the man who made my heart flutter and the only one who made me blush, no matter what might have happened I’ll never stop sighing dreamily at the sight of him, or the sound of his voice, he is my universe and I am glad I was once his.
“Your dad says you’ll be off to Africa” I nodded still speechless “I just wanted to wish you luck” he gave me thumbs up and straightened, in that moment I could not let him go like that I needed to tell him I was sorry.
“Michael, I am sorry” I said slowly and my voice was so low he barely heard me.
“No don’t worry Abbey I know you were only kidding” this took me by surprise, I was not kidding in anyway “It was all because of the alcohol” this time I took the glasses off and let the force of his eyes drown me before stating.
“I was not kidding” after that he gave a small smile and whispered.
“I thought so” and he just left, daddy came back and drove us to the airport, I felt angry because that meant he didn’t feel the same way, to him I was only little Abbey, the cute adopted daughter of his producer and friend Quincy Jones, or so I thought.
Holiday in Kenya was amazing I was thrilled because I could stroke a lion, hold a snake, and watch the beautiful sunsets in the other side of the world, one afternoon I got a call from john Howard he wanted me to be his date for a charity party one of his friends was throwing, I accepted not only because he was incredibly handsome but because I needed to move on and forget Michael it was not sane that I would wait for him to love me, it would take years.
So I apologized to dad when I told him I had to go back for the party, he was sad of course I could see it, but he told me to “have a good time” like if that was even possible, I had too many things in my head, maybe I just needed to relax with some friends.
So in a cute cocktail dress I went off to John’s place, he was wearing a tux, the party was not so bad it was very fancy and when I felt I would die of boredom circled by people talking about pollution I saw him, looking dashing in one of those outfits I loved too much, with thick black sun glasses, but I knew he saw me too, I left the circle of people I was in to approach him, it’s been nearly a month since I saw Michael but he was still gorgeous as ever his brilliant smile greeting me, and in that moment the party turned out to be the best event I’ve attended, because with he and his smile I felt in home.
We talked and even danced a little, of course my ungraceful movements were nothing compared to his. And right after being at ease he spoke about the topic the two of us feared too much.
“Abbey let’s forget what you said” he stated looking at the winter sky; there in the balcony out from everyone’s sight I could finally speak my mind.
“You can but I won’t get rid of the feelings” he smiled and shook his head but didn’t say anything else, we remained quiet for a long time, me trying to figure out what the problem was, why he couldn’t feel something for me, was I that ugly? “Is is the age?” I asked after the silence “Because if it is well I can’t help the fact you’re old” he then laughed, and I keep it till these days, the magical sound, pure music to my ears.
“No it’s not the problem, the problem is that I don’t want to hurt you” then he did felt something for me at least some sympathy “You need to date too many guys when I need to settle down” he explained and then it clicked, it was not pure sympathy, he did liked me in a way, probably less strong than the way I liked him. In that moment the flame of love grew inside me, my heart was full with butterflies and my heart was pounding so loud I thought it would come out of my chest, in that moment it all was perfect, maybe he wasn’t confessing his love for me, and Michael was confessing his feelings. From that moment being close to him was electrifying.
“It’s my problem if I want to get hurt, and I’ve dated enough gits to realize who is the keeper of my heart” the last was sort of a lie, because I’ve only dated one guy, Tom and he was so sweet it made me sick. Then John Howard said he was dropping me home, I nodded and looked at Michael who was still quiet “Good bye” I said, but I said this with a double meaning, I was not only saying a “See you later” I was truly saying good bye, my plans were Paris, London, Italy.
Thank god Michael realized what this meant, he took me by the arm and the electricity flowed, his touch was hard yet soft, and when our eyes met our paths that had been so distant became one again, because he finally was mine and I was his, like the two remaining pieces of a puzzle we clicked and then he said the words I will never forget.
“Don’t go Abbey” and I didn’t I accepted to be with him as long as he wanted me, as long as he loved me, john Howard left mumbling curses under his breath about me, but neither Michael or me cared, because the two of us wanted this moment to last forever.
But happily ever after is only true in fairy tales and for someone else but not for me, but right then staring into those chocolate brown eyes of the man I loved I didn’t believe it everything was perfect, just like in a fairy tale.